I am not the one who is making it look complicated and going all rigid about it. I have three of my own and I know what interests a child more in that age rather than his / her parents name. For me it is as simple as this adopt, raise and groom that child to be a better human and a devout Muslim, and when he is of age, mature and is independent let him / her know the whole story. In between I don't think I need any fatwas or interference of any Molvi sb in my personal affairs.
Need help regarding Child Adoption
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I am not the one who is making it look complicated and going all rigid about it. I have three of my own and I know what interests a child more in that age rather than his / her parents name. For me it is as simple as this adopt, raise and groom that child to be a better human and a devout Muslim, and when he is of age, mature and is independent let him / her know the whole story. In between I don't think I need any fatwas or interference of any Molvi sb in my personal affairs.
Water Car Engineer
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Big decision you've made, I obviously cant help you, but I've always thought people who adopt are rather selfless. Granted you treat the child properly.
Zain Ul Abideen Trimzy
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good actually things are simple read quran and sunnah and follow it and if you dont then its munafiqat or fisq if u are not even listning to what quran says and claim to be Muslim.No need to follow any molvi untill u dont understand/get confused about something in religious matters.for documentation its Must(if u know his father) as for calling him from his child hood with his fathers name its not must
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Genghis khan1
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I concur with @Raja.Pakistani .Adoption is a serious matter and you need to consult Islamic scholar about it. Mehrum/na-mehram plus you can't give your name to orphan child (i.e alter his lineage) . You have good intentions, but don't get in trouble for unknown things.Hi all,
I have a son who just turned 3 and is about to start going school in coming 6 months (hopefully), so its time to think about expanding the family.
After thinking about this, I've decided to adopt a child instead of going for our own child (2 kids in total are all I want). Luckily, my wife's always been the first one to support me in every tough decision, so here again she has understood my point of view and agreed. Honestly, I had bit of tough time convincing my dad but in the end all's perfectly fine as we all are agreed about all the responsibility and stuff that comes with a child adoption.
Why I decided to adopt a child, well I remember as a child that my mom always wanted to adopt an orphan cousin of mine but my father (due to some family conflicts and other issues) never agreed, and he had valid reasons. So I've always had it in me (thanks to my mom), always wanted to adopt a child and raise him as my own along with my own kids.
---
Now the problem is, after convincing my entire family I still have no idea about how to proceed with this plan. Not sure where should I consult or contact for child adoption. I know there are organizations like Edhi etc but I want suggestions about the legal process as well. Unfortunately, none of my close relatives or friends have adopted anyone so I'm unable to find valuable assistance hence here I am asking you guys.
Do let me know if there are any centers or organizations in Lahore (where I live) where I should contact, and how to proceed with the process. Like I've said, I want complete custody of the child as I want to raise him as my own. Boy or girl doesn't matter, cast / ethnicity - I don't buy these things. Ideally the child should be less than 1.5 years old so we can groom him as we want.
@Jzaib @Jango @Armstrong @jaibi @Tameem @WAJsal @Color_Less_Sky @Irfan Baloch @Bratva @Hyperion @Leader @Shamain @notorious_eagle
Quran is sufficient for me and is the most complete authentic source that can protect me from hear say.
Raja.Pakistani
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I think you are confusing procedure of legal adoption with taking care of orphans or taking the role of guardian to fulfill all the needs of orphans or any kids. They are two different things. These opinions of scholars explain it
If by adoption is meant that you take a poor child and look after his boarding, lodging and clothing, Islam has always stressed the importance of helping the poor and needy people. One can always give charity and fatherly love to the child.
It is reported in a Hadith that the one who assumes responsibility for the well-being of an orphan will be granted the nearness of Nabi (Sallallahu Alayhi Wasallam) in Jannat (Mishkaat). This is an extremely neglected Sunnat of our beloved Nabi (Sallallaahu Alayhi Wasallam) and we should definitely aspire in this direction; however, we must uphold the framework of the Shariah.
One cannot legally adopt; you cannot give your name to the child. Legal adoption like this is prohibited in Islam. If a person legally adopts a child there can be several complications. Firstly, the child will lose his identity. Secondly, suppose after adopting a child one has children of his own. It is natural that in such a situation you will show bias in favour of your own blood child. Thirdly, if the child born to you is of the opposite sex to the adopted child, they cannot freely stay in the same home because they aren't blood related to each other. When the adopted child, a girl, grows up, she has to make Purdah (Hijaab) with the adopted father as he is not her real father. If the boy becomes a man and marries, there will be Hijaab between the so called father and daughter-in-law.
If you adopt a child you will be depriving him/her of many rights. If a person dies, the property that he leaves behind has to be divided according to what is mentioned in the Qur'an. If the person has children and if he legally adopted a child, he will be depriving his own child of his legitimate inheritance. If a person has no children when he dies, then his wife will get 1/4 the estate. If there are children she gets 1/8. Again the adopted child will reduce the share of the mother should this child be considered legally legitimate.
To avoid all these complications, legal adoption is prohibited in Islam. However this should in no way dissuade us from earning tremendous reward by taking care of orphan children.
and Allah Ta'ala Knows Best
Mufti Ebrahim Desai
Adopting a child, bringing it up, seeing to its education and training and being kind and good towards him/her is very virtuous and a commendable act. If the child is an orphan and has no support, then the reward is much more.
In a Hadith recorded by Imam al-Bukhari in his Sahih, the Messenger of Allah (Allah bless him and give him peace) said: “I and the guardian of the orphan will be in Paradise like this”, and the Prophet (Allah bless him and give him peace) joined his index finger with his middle finger. Meaning that the one who looks after the orphan will be very close to the Prophet (Allah bless him and give him peace) in Paradise.
This is an extremely neglected Sunnah of our beloved Prophet (Allah bless him & give him peace) and we should definitely encourage ourselves and others towards this direction.
However, it should always be kept in mind that according to Shariah, the lineage of the adopted child does not become established with the adoptive parents. Adoption of a child has no legal effect in Shariah. The child should not be attributed except to the natural parents, and not to those who have adopted him/her.
This is a fundamental principle and ruling laid down by the Holy Qura’n. The people in the days of ignorance (Jahiliyya) used to treat an adopted child as the real one in all aspects. The Qura’n condemned this practice with the following verse:
“And He (Allah) did not make your adopted sons your sons. That is only your speech by your mouths. And Allah guides you to the right path. Call them by (the names of) their (real) fathers. It is more just in the sight of Allah”. (Surah al-Ahzab,v:4, 5)
The Messenger of Allah (Allah bless him and give him peace) adopted the Companion Zaid ibn Haritha (Allah be pleased with him) and the other companions (Allah be pleased with them) initially referred to him as “Zaid ibn Muhammad.” When the abovementioned verse of the Qura’n was revealed, they reverted to calling him “Zaid ibn Haritha.”
In view of this important principle of Shariah, the following points need to be taken in to consideration:
1) Legal adoption is not permissible. This means that one cannot change the lineage of an adopted child and substitute the names of his real parents with adoptive parents. The child should always be attributed to the real parents so that it becomes common knowledge amongst the people who the real parents are.
2)If the adoptive mother breastfeeds the adopted child, then it becomes their foster child. In this case the child will be similar to the real children with regards to the Nikah and Hijab rules, i.e. the child can not marry the foster parent, neither any of the foster parent’s children. However with regards to inheritance, it will not inherit from the family.
3)If the adoptive mother does not breastfeed the adopted child, then the relationship of fosterage will not be established and the child will be classed as other children with regards to Nikah and Hijab. An adopted child can marry it’s adoptive parents and their children. Also if a male child is adopted by a woman, she will observe Hijab from him after he reaches the age of puberty and visa versa. The adopted child will also (after puberty) observe Hijab with the adoptive parent’s children.
4)An adopted child will not inherit from his adoptive parents and to regard an adopted child as a real child in the matter of inheritance is incorrect. However, it should be remembered that although the child cannot inherit from the adoptive parents, it is permissible, rather advisable to make a bequest in its favor in ones life time. This will for the child can be made up to one third of ones wealth, provided the child is not already included in the list of inheritors.
5)It is necessary to allow the adopted child to meet it’s real parents. Preventing him/her from meeting them and creating any obstacles will be considered as oppression.
6)Good behavior and conduct should be displayed towards the adopted children, especially if they are orphans. If a person cannot look after the adopted child in a proper manner, then he should not adopt, otherwise he will earn punishment rather than reward.
7)The wealth of the adopted child who has not yet reached puberty, should be kept safe. If there is a need to spend the money on the child then one can utilize the child’s money upon him. However it should be spent with extreme care and there should be no extravagance. Loans cannot be taken from the child’s money, nor can it be given in charity.
Source: Ummah Forums
JonAsad
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Islam and adoption- so many confusions-
btw the age is too early for school- must be 4 or later-
btw the age is too early for school- must be 4 or later-
@Raja.Pakistani
Pakistani school age for children these days is two years. Three well no problem, 4 oh he is late.
- Nobody in Pakistan calls someone as "ibn e falan" or "bint e falan". Child is called by his own name; name of the parents is limited to the identification and school documents and NADRA database of families. And as soon as you marry a new family number is assigned to you with linkage to your father's family. So the question of stealing or hiding child's lineage is redundant here, but the continuous rhetoric that child needs to be reminded from day one that he is adopted, I don't agree with that, there is an age when you talk serious stuff with your children.
- For inheritance it is clearly mentioned in Surah Nisa verse 11 that "Will of the deceased" and debt settling take priority over all other claims and shares, so it is wise to write your will when you are breathing and have your senses working
- Mehram and Na Mehram you really want to discuss this? Come on look around you and then tell me if worrying about this concept is more important today or teaching and grooming that child in a way that he respects and acts like a gentleman is more important. If you are not preparing your children for how to save themselves from the Pakistani society then you are not a good parent. Rest I don't know about others but I have an adopted female in my extended family and none of us males have ever thought less then considering her as our own sister and daughter. For us Sooch ki Pakeezgi aur Nigah ki Haya is more important than thinking that she is not related to us a Non mehram.
Pakistani school age for children these days is two years. Three well no problem, 4 oh he is late.
Jazzbot
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Yar kids these days are way too sharp compared to what our lot used to be in our early years. Plus he's already taking very interest in studies, so that is why I think he should start going school in 6 - 8 months.
Dubious
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Hey Bro,Hi all,
I have a son who just turned 3 and is about to start going school in coming 6 months (hopefully), so its time to think about expanding the family.
After thinking about this, I've decided to adopt a child instead of going for our own child (2 kids in total are all I want). Luckily, my wife's always been the first one to support me in every tough decision, so here again she has understood my point of view and agreed. Honestly, I had bit of tough time convincing my dad but in the end all's perfectly fine as we all are agreed about all the responsibility and stuff that comes with a child adoption.
Why I decided to adopt a child, well I remember as a child that my mom always wanted to adopt an orphan cousin of mine but my father (due to some family conflicts and other issues) never agreed, and he had valid reasons. So I've always had it in me (thanks to my mom), always wanted to adopt a child and raise him as my own along with my own kids.
---
Now the problem is, after convincing my entire family I still have no idea about how to proceed with this plan. Not sure where should I consult or contact for child adoption. I know there are organizations like Edhi etc but I want suggestions about the legal process as well. Unfortunately, none of my close relatives or friends have adopted anyone so I'm unable to find valuable assistance hence here I am asking you guys.
Do let me know if there are any centers or organizations in Lahore (where I live) where I should contact, and how to proceed with the process. Like I've said, I want complete custody of the child as I want to raise him as my own. Boy or girl doesn't matter, cast / ethnicity - I don't buy these things. Ideally the child should be less than 1.5 years old so we can groom him as we want.
@Jzaib @Jango @Armstrong @jaibi @Tameem @WAJsal @Color_Less_Sky @Irfan Baloch @Bratva @Hyperion @Leader @Shamain @notorious_eagle
My chacha and chachi also wanted to adopt some years ago coz they only have sons and wanted a daughter ....but they were unsuccessful due to many reasons...
Well, adoption is a tough phenomena....
1 to look after an orphan and guard his/ her rights is tough hence the reward is also alot.
Many Asians ( like @Zarvan ) dont allow it coz of god knows what forsaken reasons ...and what they usually do is when they want a daughter they take the husband's niece and if they want a son they take the wife's nephew this way mahram ka problem nai hota.
In all types of charities, the orphan and the poor are mentioned as the prime eligible recipients for such help. In case of the rights of the orphan children, Allâh is very severe; for example, He says,
“Those who `swallow' the property of the orphans unjustly, are actually devouring fire into their bellies and they shall enter the burning fire.” (4:10)
Islam fully supports the concept of helping the orphan and poor, and taking them under your wings. If there is no one to take care of the orphan and poor children, then this responsibility falls upon the Islamic government. I won’t be wrong in saying that as far as the concept of adoption is concerned, there is no difference between Islam and the West.
However, when we come to the implications and legal consequences of adoption, we find some differences between Islam and the present system in the West.
In the Western system, adoption does not only mean that a child is given into the care of another person or persons; it also means that the adopted child will carry the family name of the adoptive parent. For example, if a child named John Stuart Mill is adopted by Mr. William Bourassa, he will become John W. Bourassa. If this adoption took place in infancy, then most probably the child will never come to know his real genealogy or his real family name.
It is this part of the adoption procedure that Islam does not accept. In pre-Islamic Arabia, the adoption system was similar to what we now see in the West: the child even takes the family name of the adoptive father. When Islam came, it categorically rejected this procedure.
“Nor has He (Allâh) made your adopted sons your sons. Such is (only) your (manner of) speech by your mouths. But God tells the truth, and He shows the way. Call them by (the names of) their fathers, that is better in the sight of God”. (33:5)
After the revelation of this verse, Zayd was again called Zayd bin Hâritha and not Zayd bin Muhammad. However, this change in name did not affect the relationship of the Prophet and Zayd. They were still like father and son.
As the Qur'ân says, calling adopted children by the names of their adoptive fathers is contrary to “the truth,” and therefore, they. must be called by the name of their real fathers
You have to take care of mahram, purda, and your will...However,
There is only one case of adoption where a sort of semi-familial relationship and mahramiyyat is created between the adopted child and the adoptive family: when the adopted child is below two years of age and is also breast-fed directly by the adoptive mother for at least a day and a night.
This creates a foster (rizâ`i) relationship, and the child is mahram to the new family—there is no need for hijâb,nor can the child marry the real children of the adoptive parents. However, in case of inheritance, even a rizâ`ichild has not right in the estate of the adoptive parents. But as mentioned above, the adoptive parents can write up to one-third of their estate for their adopted child.
Well since I was brought up outside Pakistan, adoption was very common and no one felt horny over their adopted child...So the kid never had to use hijab and was very much a mahram. If the father's name was unknown they would put ibn Abdullah - son of Slave of ALLAH
Adoption is certainly not prohibited. What is unlawful is to attribute one’s adopted child to oneself, as if there is a biological relationship. This is because Islam seeks to safeguard biological lineage and not confuse lineage.
Allah says in the Qur’ân about adopted children: “Call them by the names of their fathers: that is more just in the sight of Allah, but if you do not know their father’s names, (then they are) your brothers in faith, or your wards, but there is no blame on you if you make a mistake therein: (what counts is) the intention of your hearts.”
We can see from this verse that calling one’s adopted ward “son” or “daughter” out of affection without meaning it literally is allowed. The same can be said for an adopted child calling the people who adopted him “father” and “mother” out of love respect. This is perfectly alright.
It is lawful to bring up children in one’s house and to love them as one’s own children, but the attribution of those children should always be to their true, biological parents. If the identity of the child’s parents is unknown, then the child should be given a general attribution that originates with the child.
As Allah says in the Qur’ân: “...but if you do not know their father’s names, (then they are) your brothers in faith, or your wards.”
In Islamic Law, since adopted children retain their own family identity and do not assume that of their guardians, they may even marry from the families of their guardians. This is because the biological children of the guardians are not, in Islamic Law, the adopted child’s brothers and sisters, though they may have a close friendly relationship with each other.
Likewise, adopted children do not automatically inherit from their guardians who adopted them.
Because the adopted child does not receive a fixed portion of the guardians’ estate, the child’s guardians should make a bequest to their adopted ward. A person can bequeath up to one-third of the total estate to non-inheritors. Indeed, this means that, in many cases, an adopted child can receive more of the estate through a bequest than the biological children receive through their fixed and unalterable share of the inheritance.
The wisdom behind this might possibly be that an adopted ward may have less of a community support structure than a child who has a family. In any event, the amount of the estate that an adopted child may inherit as a bequest is left to the wisdom and discretion of those who adopt the child, up to one-third of the estate.
And Allah knows best.
http://en.islamtoday.net/quesshow-16-786.htm
mostly due to ignorance...I had a few friends who were adopted.....very sensitive topic indeed for them ...BUT since I was abroad alot of other things also didnt apply....the girls were treated as their own biological child....though the father's name was not changed but no parda and stuff was observed as the couple didnt have any child of their own the adopted was loved beyond reasons even married off and now she (one of my closest friends) is expecting her 2nd child....
Zarrar Alvi
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go to afghan refugee camp and give them 1 lakh and adopt a beautiful baby boy or a baby girl
Jazzbot
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Thanks for very detailed and informative post, cleared a lot of confusion that I had.
However, I don't get what's the issue with this Mehram stuff? I mean we don't impose strict Islamic rules on our normal lives when it comes to relations with cousins, they daily visit our homes and our female members just treat them as their brothers without any fuss. Same goes with uncles, aunts etc.
Why imposing strict rules just on adopted kids? One should either follow these Islamic rules on every way of life, or ignore them completely. Why this selective approach? Like my wife can meet her cousins, uncles but has to breast feed an adopted child to make him mehram. Similarly, my daughter can study in university alongside Na-Mehram boys and get frank with her cousins, but she has to stay away from his so called brother just because he was adopted.
Sorry but I'm not able to digest this. We're living in 21st century.
Zarvan
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Sorry adoption is strictly forbidden by Islam. You can't call someone else child your own. Breastfeeding can make you Razai parents but not real ones and it's better to call that child by his or her father's name. ALLAH and his RASOOL SAW knows best and that is why RASOOL SAW was stopped by ALLAH from calling Hazrat ZAID RA his son.@Akhelios
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