Need help regarding Child Adoption

[Jazzbot]

Very noble idea mate but Islamic concept of mahrum or namharum and Islamic rules of inheritance make this adoption process bit complicated especially when these adopted children become young adult. To sponsor the orphans and to fulfil all their needs or to raise them with the same care as if they are your own son/daughter is less complicated matter

Yes, I came to know about these complications, so I guess the best way forward is become a guardian of the adopted child and keep his original identity in documents instead of declaring yourself as his / her parent.

MASHALLAH, May ALLAH bless you, a noble deed and a great act ......................... Galy milo bahi I have three and my wife and I have planned that as soon as the youngest gets 4 years old we are going to adopt the fourth one preferably a female infant child, as I have two sons and one daughter only, may ALLAH make that happen Ameen.

I have a Malaysian colleague she adopted all three of her children two Pakistani girls and one Indonesian boy. One of the girls is Kashmiri or Pushtoon and the younger is Urdu Speaking . She told me that it was a difficult process for her to adopt those girls and finally she met Bilquis Edhi personally and convinced her that she will take good care of the girls, and she has done a splendid job may ALLAH bless her.

I have the same questions and I think if we go for adoption from an orphanage they must have the proper documentation for registering the child but legally in documents we can be the guardians and not parents of the child (I think), I am not sure keep me updated with how it went, the process of adoption. JazakALLAH

Yup, like I've said above the best thing to do is become a guardian instead of parent (in legal documents). One of my uncle is a gyni doctor and he told me that they sometimes face some cases when people tell them that they don't want to keep the new born and leave it with them for adoption. Or sometimes they find infants outside their center. They check if someone wants to adopt the child, else they send them to Edhi etc. So I'm going to try and get a child directly from them & have the legal things set up. Will also keep looking at these child adoption centers. Lets see how things turn out, will keep you posted.

 

[Leader]

Yar I know all these things, and have witnessed a couple of cases personally where thing went terribly wrong. But there are exceptions, its best to take the child in confidence and tell him about his identity when he's capable of handling such things, it all comes down at how you brought him up and how you've groomed him.

And about society & relatives and all that, I wouldn't have decided such a thing had I cared for the society or relatives. If we start to care about society and relatives, then believe me they won't even allow you to breath.

Anyways, most of the cases with adopted kids go wrong when a couple adopts a kid because they are not having their own. But after few years of adoption, when God bless them with their own kids, they start discriminating between their own child and the adopted one. In my case, I have my own son who's already 3 years old, so I am not adopting a child just because I don't have any kids.

There are a couple of examples I know where people adopted kids and raised them as their own, perfectly. We need to just keep our acts right and trust on our intentions, rest is not in our hands. What tomorrow is going to bring for us, is not known. So better leave it at God's will and just focus on what steps we are taking today.

Anyways, I appreciate your critical suggestion. Only a true friend shows you the other side of the picture.

We should sit and talk about it.. lets meet up this weekend?

 

[WAJsal]

Good luck @Jazzbot , very brave of you. I hope you follow this plan.

 

[Jazzbot]

We should sit and talk about it.. lets meet up this weekend?

Would love to, lets plan. You have my cell number, right?

 

[pak-marine]

Hi all,

I have a son who just turned 3 and is about to start going school in coming 6 months (hopefully), so its time to think about expanding the family.

After thinking about this, I've decided to adopt a child instead of going for our own child (2 kids in total are all I want). Luckily, my wife's always been the first one to support me in every tough decision, so here again she has understood my point of view and agreed. Honestly, I had bit of tough time convincing my dad but in the end all's perfectly fine as we all are agreed about all the responsibility and stuff that comes with a child adoption.

Why I decided to adopt a child, well I remember as a child that my mom always wanted to adopt an orphan cousin of mine but my father (due to some family conflicts and other issues) never agreed, and he had valid reasons. So I've always had it in me (thanks to my mom), always wanted to adopt a child and raise him as my own along with my own kids.

---

Now the problem is, after convincing my entire family I still have no idea about how to proceed with this plan. Not sure where should I consult or contact for child adoption. I know there are organizations like Edhi etc but I want suggestions about the legal process as well. Unfortunately, none of my close relatives or friends have adopted anyone so I'm unable to find valuable assistance hence here I am asking you guys.

Do let me know if there are any centers or organizations in Lahore (where I live) where I should contact, and how to proceed with the process. Like I've said, I want complete custody of the child as I want to raise him as my own. Boy or girl doesn't matter, cast / ethnicity - I don't buy these things. Ideally the child should be less than 1.5 years old so we can groom him as we want.




@Jzaib @Jango @Armstrong @jaibi @Tameem @WAJsal @Color_Less_Sky @Irfan Baloch @Bratva @Hyperion @Leader @Shamain @notorious_eagle

Very Noble but think it through a 1000 times .. think about the adopted child , your wife and most importantly your son

 

[Rafael]

Very noble idea my man! I have no words to describe my pleasure.

Please keep us posted about the procedures. May Allah give us all enough strength to follow what you are doing.

 

[Leader]

Would love to, lets plan. You have my cell number, right?

I should have.. I will contact you otherwise through here, I think the number you have is off, as I switched to ufone.

 

[PurpleButcher]

Greetings,

Excellent gesture on your part. Few things that immediately come to my mind

1> In Holy Quran, when mentioning the story of Hazrat Zaid Bin Haris (who was previously called Zaid Bin Muhammad), it has been made clear that when you adopt a child, the parentage cannot be changed. You can act as a "Father", be a legal guardian but you cannot legally and religiously claim the adopted kid to be your offspring and this fact must be evident to the child as well.

2> If you already have a son, and you adopt a baby girl, then you will have to be mindful of the fact that though you may raise them as siblings, but they will not be "Mehram". So you will have to keep this thing in mind while raising them up as well.

3> If you do not write a "Will", as per my understanding of Pakistan's legal system, the adopted child cannot inherit a single penny. If you want to raise the adopted child as if your own and give him/her the same privileges as your own offspring, you will have to clearly transfer some property (movable as well as immovable) to the adopted child otherwise he/she might get nothing.

4>Best of luck and I hope one day I will be able to do the same.

PS:- @Akheilos and @Zarvan might be able to present a much better Islamic perspective

 

[I.R.A]

Why people are so much worried about Islamic perspective? Come on I mean please if anyone is planning to adopt a child obviously he will be treating that child as one of his own, encourage him and stop bringing this religion into it. I think a female abandoned infant adopted by an educated nice family with their male children is lot better than left for ALLAH knows what ........................... Yeh sab Islami hujatain achai kay kam may he q yad ati hain humay?

@Jazzbot go a head buddy, if you think good, good it will be. I will do the same within 2 years max INSHALLAH and I will adopt a female infant child and I know how I will groom my sons to respect and protect that child as their real younger sister.

 

[Zarvan]

Hi all,

I have a son who just turned 3 and is about to start going school in coming 6 months (hopefully), so its time to think about expanding the family.

After thinking about this, I've decided to adopt a child instead of going for our own child (2 kids in total are all I want). Luckily, my wife's always been the first one to support me in every tough decision, so here again she has understood my point of view and agreed. Honestly, I had bit of tough time convincing my dad but in the end all's perfectly fine as we all are agreed about all the responsibility and stuff that comes with a child adoption.

Why I decided to adopt a child, well I remember as a child that my mom always wanted to adopt an orphan cousin of mine but my father (due to some family conflicts and other issues) never agreed, and he had valid reasons. So I've always had it in me (thanks to my mom), always wanted to adopt a child and raise him as my own along with my own kids.

---

Now the problem is, after convincing my entire family I still have no idea about how to proceed with this plan. Not sure where should I consult or contact for child adoption. I know there are organizations like Edhi etc but I want suggestions about the legal process as well. Unfortunately, none of my close relatives or friends have adopted anyone so I'm unable to find valuable assistance hence here I am asking you guys.

Do let me know if there are any centers or organizations in Lahore (where I live) where I should contact, and how to proceed with the process. Like I've said, I want complete custody of the child as I want to raise him as my own. Boy or girl doesn't matter, cast / ethnicity - I don't buy these things. Ideally the child should be less than 1.5 years old so we can groom him as we want.




@Jzaib @Jango @Armstrong @jaibi @Tameem @WAJsal @Color_Less_Sky @Irfan Baloch @Bratva @Hyperion @Leader @Shamain @notorious_eagle

In Islam their is no such thing as adoption. Even if you take a infant and your wife breast feeds her yes you would be child's Razai parents but you would have to call the child by her fathers name along with child's name. You can't give that child your name. It's better to have your kid and with that take care of some orphan.
@Jazzbot @Akheilos

 

[Devil Soul]

@Jazzbot i hope you fulfil this responsibility of raising an orphan, good luck

 

[Jzaib]

I dnt know much much about child adoption. But I want to wish you best of luck

 

[Zain Ul Abideen Trimzy]

Why people are so much worried about Islamic perspective? Come on I mean please if anyone is planning to adopt a child obviously he will be treating that child as one of his own, encourage him and stop bringing this religion into it. I think a female abandoned infant adopted by an educated nice family with their male children is lot better than left for ALLAH knows what ........................... Yeh sab Islami hujatain achai kay kam may he q yad ati hain humay?

@Jazzbot go a head buddy, if you think good, good it will be. I will do the same within 2 years max INSHALLAH and I will adopt a female infant child and I know how I will groom my sons to respect and protect that child as their real younger sister.

actually Islamic law is very easy u can easily make him ur mahram by breast feeding from ur wife or ur wives sisters no need to worry and btw ap ko kis nay kaha k burai k waqt he islam yad ata hay research a bit aisi koi baat nai hy agar ham islam ko apna religion yani way of life mantay hain to guidence b banti hay warna ham munafiq huay na hay k nai

 

[Leviza]

MashAllah, You are doing the right thing mate..

Adoption and taking care of a orphan have one of the biggest rewards in Islam. As you are going to adopt a child without parents, there is no issues with that as there are nothing you are going to get in this world and giving a child everything starting from love ...

 

[livingdead]

Thats very brave and noble of you, but you should think about it a bit longer .. and a bit more. You got a lot of time as you are young.