High rates of Divorce in Pak society and esp in Military class

[Lincoln]

As I said before, Our culture have almost nothing to do with Islam , We are far away from Islam , Islam does not allow domestic violence ,,,,,,, Islam tell us to take good care of women , children and elders , but we have problems in our culture …… If you fallow cases you will find out in 95% cases women are main culprits (as mother-in-law , Daughter-in-law , nannad , jathani , darani , tai , you name it)..
In OP post madam clearly mentioned educated , middle class or higher middle class , not poor or common illiterate people...…. Domestic violence is last thing in middle class and upper class families , in those classes problem is Ego , Feminism , Not ready for adjustment attitude , lake of patience and as I said Lack of Knowledge (Islam).
In lower middle class or in common (poor) families one of main reason is domestic violence , Here also lack of knowledge involve (if husband knows what he will face for beating his wife he will never do it) and dear sir, In 95 out of 100 divorces women or somehow involve(in domestic violence) .

I remember asking a friend why she is always watching drama serials, all they have is women on the receiving end, be it domestic violence, forced constraints, abuses, and yet she is expected to be patient and sacrificial all the time. She said, well they are famous because they show reality. In even educated families, domestic violence is rampant. I have seen it first hand. What dictates this is not the level of education but culture. Education doesn't give a person manners, that's just how the education system is around the world, it's a bit stupid.

You quote 95%. You better have a source. How are the women responsible?

 

[CHACHA"G"]

Ohhhhhh


No you're just a retard.

If your family female were to go around in short clothes and obviously, as I can tell, u would not like it at all, would you kill her to protect your tiny honor?

Yep I am retard according to you …… And that honor post is so knowledgeable from you .. Complete show of hormonal imbalance ..
@AZ1 , @Maarkhoor ..

 

[Lincoln]

Yep I am retard according to you …… And that honor post is so knowledgeable from you .. Complete show of hormonal imbalance ..
@AZ1 , @Maarkhoor ..

He asked about my family, so I gave him a good answer.

In case you missed it, he asked if I would be okay if a female from my family were to start wearing short clothes.

I know where the dumbass is going with this.

Which is why I asked him what would he do if one of his family females were to wear short clothes.

 

[CHACHA"G"]

You quote 95%. You better have a source. How are the women responsible?

I think you missed the part in one of my post where I mentioned female/women as/with different relationship (names) ,
There are 2 mother-in-laws , then so many sister-in-laws , then Tai , chachi , phophi , mami , and you name them ..
Who start fighting because of lack of Jahaiz ? who start fighting because of "she is not doing enough" ? Be honest ..
For example : Mr , Z is out side of his home earning Rozi - Roti , at 8:00 pm he came home and first thing he come across his mother (women / mother-in/law) complaining about his wife , then he go to his room there his wife start complaining against his mother …….. What do you think what will happen ? and what will you say about people(women) involve ??

Edit : I am editing my post for one more example , I usually don't quote personal example but in this case I will .
My eldest brother got married in late 80s , on day of Barrat we suddenly find out our eldest Tai(woman) is missing (not arrived) , My father start phoning here and there , then we find out she is angry and she is at her home , My father and I took the road and reached her house , now just read the crazy reason of her anger , she was angry because we did not send car to pick her daughter and her son-in-law .. Her daughter was there(in Barrat at our place) , then my father said sorry , took her and on our way back we also picked her son-in-law , this isn't the end , this is only start , First Barrat was late 2 hours , then at bride place she said so many bad things about us to bride family , one of them was "No one in our family was ready to give his/her daughter to Groom , that is why they married him outside of family" , this was start of painful life for my brother , he face so many difficulties in his In-Laws …… Now tell me who to blame here ? My Brother ? who have nothing to do with that woman(our tai)..
And before you say my tai is/was illiterate , she done her matric in 1950 and she was in 2nd year of her F.A when she got married ..

 

[AZ1]

If your family female were to go around in short clothes and obviously, as I can tell, u would not like it at all, would you kill her to protect your tiny honor?

There is no IF as we know what been taught in Islam.and boundaries.
Now will you let your female family go wearing short cloths and let be risk of ( ALLAH na karay) victim of rape in the society?

 

[fitpOsitive]

Hi Everyone @Oscar @Horus @Windjammer @Everyone else

I have recently seen four marriages dissolving and family going into disarray with destruction of family and children. This is all what i have seen in last one year. All have come from our military class and not the high officers class but from relatively decently educated middle grade young officers class. The divorce rates are already astonishingly high in civilian classes and that is all due to the 'faminine revolution' and rules being drafted in legislature giving females unprecedented rights in name of female liberty. Most certainly these females living with young officers are not oppressed, they come from good origins, have good education. They are not like the poor unducated class. This is bizzare and i was distressed with that. In one case, the female not only destroyed the life of the young man but also took away the children and now he has to present himself to court every month to meet his children. In this case, the female's father is a former brigadere and he has concieved several bogus charges against him in addition to divorce ( i say they are bogus, because i know the family for 25 years atleast).

This is all happened when we have embarked on dajjals feminist revolution and started drafting all kind of pro-female legalities and rules changing the balance between male and female as ordained by Allah SWT. I feel shattered to see this. We need to kickstart a campaign to stop this fanatic course of destruction.

When men and women are not ready to tolerate each other. When men and women and their families lie before marriages, this happens.

Men and women should understand and should keep in mind that humans are not perfect and marriages can only survive when both the partners keep their desires under tight control. Otherwise caboom....

 

[Valar.]

Lack of compatibility mostly mental and sometimes physical are cause of divorces.

Mental compatibility consists of spouses having:
- Different personalities (introvert/extrovert)
- Different social classes i.e. rich poor
- Different religious inclination - one being more religious than other
- Different societal views i.e., one being more liberal or conservative than the other
- Different education/professional background could also play a role in differences
- Different family views i.e., one believes in joint family system while other does not
- Different future ambitions i.e. one being too ambitious while other way too content
- Different personality disorders play a role too like OCD, depression, bipolar disorder etc
- Different financial spending habits like one being too shopaholic while other being too miser
- Age difference

Physical compatibility consists of:
- Spouses having polar opposite sexual drive or needs (sorry, but it's a topic for mature people so please allow it)
- Different height of spouses
- Different weight of spouses
- Different level of physical attraction or preferences which can happen either due to arrange marriage or due to having love marriage based on good mental compatibility but lacking in physical attraction for 1 spouse.

All in all, there is no 1 simple answer or reason for divorces.

 

[Lincoln]

There is no IF as we know what been taught in Islam.and boundaries.
Now will you let your female family go wearing short cloths and let be risk of ( ALLAH na karay) victim of rape in the society?

What you are asking is a also a question of if.

Now, let me ask you to show your dumb hypocrisy and also expose you.

"Now would you let your female family go wearing short clothes, or will you rather kill her to protect her and more importantly your honour."

 

[313ghazi]

The only thing that has changed is that women have more education, are more equipped to live independently and therefore don't tolerate as much BS.

If you treat your wives as baby making maids who are there to fulfil your and your families need 24/7 don't be surprised if they leave you.

They are people too, the have opinions, they get tired, they need your time and emotional support.

Pakistani society is in decay, the form of femenism in our society is an example of this decay. Its focused on being anti man more than being pro woman. This will have negative connotations on young minds, but is not the main reason for divorce.

Similarly our expectations are different. Physical attraction is an absolute must in any marriage but today its given priority over character; its only surpassed by wealth. When you marry looking at bank accounts, don't be surprised when these people don't always have value of human beings.

 

[OldenWisdom...قول بزرگ]

A hollow society is taking to the fore... one devoid of any morals, deep thinking, family values and respect. Once family disintegrates the society at large wouldn't take long... everything you see from showing skin to seek attention, to etiquettes of behavior in and with your neighborhood changes... people used to have opinions about those without mores in their neighborhood, they could care less today. All of this devolves into to lack of personal relations, barricading oneself from society to disrespecting or altogether cutting familial ties.
This has more to do with the kind of education or lack their of the next generation is getting. Which is not only disconnecting up coming generation from cultural connaissance and more importantly their faith.

 

[Lincoln]

Lack of compatibility mostly mental and sometimes physical are cause of divorces.

Mental compatibility consists of spouses having:
- Different personalities (introvert/extrovert)
- Different social classes i.e. rich poor
- Different religious inclination - one being more religious than other
- Different societal views i.e., one being more liberal or conservative than the other
- Different education/professional background could also play a role in differences
- Different family views i.e., one believes in joint family system while other does not
- Different future ambitions i.e. one being too ambitious while other way too content
- Different personality disorders play a role too like OCD, depression, bipolar disorder etc
- Different financial spending habits like one being too shopaholic while other being too miser
- Age difference

Physical compatibility consists of:
- Spouses having polar opposite sexual drive or needs (sorry, but it's a topic for mature people so please allow it)
- Different height of spouses
- Different weight of spouses
- Different level of physical attraction or preferences which can happen either due to arrange marriage or due to having love marriage based on good mental compatibility but lacking in physical attraction for 1 spouse.

All in all, there is no 1 simple answer or reason for divorces.

No, sir, feminism is to blame, and maybe dajjal as well. No need to ask divorcees or explore logical reasoning.

A hollow society is taking to the fore... one devoid of any morals, deep thinking, family values and respect. Once family disintegrates the society at large wouldn't take long... everything you see from showing skin to seek attention, to etiquettes of behavior in and with your neighborhood changes... people used to have opinions about those without mores in their neighborhood, they could care less today. All of this devolves into to lack of personal relations, barricading oneself from society to disrespecting or altogether cutting familial ties.
This has more to do with the kind of education or lack their of the next generation is getting. Which is not only disconnecting up coming generation from cultural connaissance and more importantly their faith.

What good is a family if the two people feel forced to live with each other while not wanting the other, or one is constrained, or one is abused, or there is violence.

You tell me.

 

[Pakistani Fighter]

If you treat your wives as baby making maids who are there to fulfil your and your families need 24/7 don't be surprised if they leave you.

Bhai bache sirf Mard nahi maangta

 

[Lincoln]

The only thing that has changed is that women have more education, are more equipped to live independently and therefore don't tolerate as much BS.

If you treat your wives as baby making maids who are there to fulfil your and your families need 24/7 don't be surprised if they leave you.

They are people too, the have opinions, they get tired, they need your time and emotional support.

Pakistani society is in decay, the form of femenism in our society is an example of this decay. Its focused on being anti man more than being pro woman. This will have negative connotations on young minds, but is not the main reason for divorce.

Similarly our expectations are different. Physical attraction is an absolute must in any marriage but today its given priority over character; its only surpassed by wealth. When you marry looking at bank accounts, don't be surprised when these people don't always have value of human beings.

100%.

 

[Pakistani Fighter]

This will have negative connotations on young minds, but is not the main reason for divorce.

Not now but unfortunately soon just like we see in West

 

[Lincoln]

Bhai bache sirf Mard nahi maangta

True but his point is that men in our society don't look at women as beyond anything other than baby making machines.

Not now but unfortunately soon just like we see in West

You know what else has negative connotations on young minds, when the child sees his father abusing his mother.

We must stop comparing to west. They have rights there. Women in Pakistan don't have rights. What feminism is trying to achieve in west is different from what it is trying to achieve in Pakistan.