I realize this article is supposed to be more on the comedy side of things - because if it's not, I'm seriously disturbed by the level of irresponsibility and misinformation in our newspapers. First of all,
This pseudo-liberal (the author) has no idea what she's talking about. Parroting the Western and Indian narrative while completely disregarding the reality of what 'Jihad fi sabillillah' means and what it signifies in this political conflict is a really irresponsible thing to do. All it does is reinforce the misunderstandings that make the 'Islamic' terrorist narrative so powerful, and that is not something anyone should do nowadays.
No such school exists in Pakistan. I have been to the top-level 'Elite' 'Westernized' schools in Pakistan and none of them prohibit Urdu. That is an exaggeration to say the least. Some prohibit provincial language (i.e Punjabi, Saraiki etc) slang and what they consider to be bad language but absolutely none prohibit speaking normal, decent Urdu. They even have Urdu lessons. A lot of Urdu lessons, actually.
Even more irresponsible idiocy. Instead of clarifying the reality about Islamic concepts like Jizya, she is spreading more of the same narrative that lets terrorists turn their politics into an ''Islam vs Everyone else'' scenario. And she's talking to a kid when she does this.
Refuting lies about Islam: Allegation that Islam expanded by forcing people to pay Jizyah
It's even worse because no one in Pakistan is legally required to pay any Jizya.
She is also apparently a PPP supporter - not surprising at all.
Hilariously referencing Christine Fair's book in her facile defamation of the PA.
What a laughable conclusion.
And now the mandatory reference to the inappropriate activities of some people (in that specific place) to add more to the insult of Pakistanis.
The reality is very different. This article ignores so many viewpoints, so many social and political realities, along with making so many factual errors that it is, laughable, as I believe and hope it was intended to be.
I'll just quote a comment from the original article (long but worth a read):