Abu Zolfiqar
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Stupid and Funny from all over the world
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DO MEN REMEMBER ANNIVERSARIES?
A woman awakes during the night to find that her husband was not in
their bed.
She puts on her dressing gown and goes downstairs to look for him.
She finds him sitting at the kitchen table with a hot cup of coffee in
front of him. He appears to be in deep thought, just staring at the
wall.
She watches as he wipes a tear from his eye and takes a sip of his
coffee.
'What's the matter, dear?' she whispers as she steps into the room, 'Why
are you down here at this time of night?'
The husband looks up from his coffee, 'I am just remembering when we
first met 20 years ago and started dating. You were only 16. Do you
remember back then?' he says solemnly.
The wife is touched to tears thinking that her husband is so caring, so
sensitive.
'Yes, I do' she replies.
The husband pauses. The words were not coming easily.
'Do you remember when your father caught us in the back seat of my car?'
'Yes, I remember!' said the wife, lowering herself into a chair beside
him.
The husband continues. 'Do you remember when he shoved the shotgun in my
face and said, 'Either you marry my daughter, or I will send you to jail
for 20 years?'
'I remember that too' she replies softly.
He wipes another tear from his cheek and says...
'I would have been released today.'
A woman awakes during the night to find that her husband was not in
their bed.
She puts on her dressing gown and goes downstairs to look for him.
She finds him sitting at the kitchen table with a hot cup of coffee in
front of him. He appears to be in deep thought, just staring at the
wall.
She watches as he wipes a tear from his eye and takes a sip of his
coffee.
'What's the matter, dear?' she whispers as she steps into the room, 'Why
are you down here at this time of night?'
The husband looks up from his coffee, 'I am just remembering when we
first met 20 years ago and started dating. You were only 16. Do you
remember back then?' he says solemnly.
The wife is touched to tears thinking that her husband is so caring, so
sensitive.
'Yes, I do' she replies.
The husband pauses. The words were not coming easily.
'Do you remember when your father caught us in the back seat of my car?'
'Yes, I remember!' said the wife, lowering herself into a chair beside
him.
The husband continues. 'Do you remember when he shoved the shotgun in my
face and said, 'Either you marry my daughter, or I will send you to jail
for 20 years?'
'I remember that too' she replies softly.
He wipes another tear from his cheek and says...
'I would have been released today.'
Future Weapon
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Vajpayee, Musharraf, Madhuri Dixit and Margaret Thatcher are traveling in a train. The train suddenly goes through a tunnel and it gets completely dark. Suddenly there is a kissing sound and then a slap! The train comes out of the tunnel. Thatcher and Vajpayee are sitting there looking perplexed. Musharraf is bent over holding his face, which is red from an apparent slap. All of them remain diplomatic and nobody says anything.
Thatcher is thinking: "These Pakistanis are all crazy after Madhuri. Musharraf must have tried to kiss her in the tunnel. Very proper that she slapped him"
Madhuri is thinking: "Musharraf must have moved to kiss me, and kissed Margaret instead and got slapped."
Musharraf is thinking: "Damn! it, Vajpayee must have tried to kiss Madhuri, she thought it was me and slapped! me."
Vajpayee is thinking: "If this train goes through another tunnel, I could make another kissing sound and slap Musharraf again."
Thatcher is thinking: "These Pakistanis are all crazy after Madhuri. Musharraf must have tried to kiss her in the tunnel. Very proper that she slapped him"
Madhuri is thinking: "Musharraf must have moved to kiss me, and kissed Margaret instead and got slapped."
Musharraf is thinking: "Damn! it, Vajpayee must have tried to kiss Madhuri, she thought it was me and slapped! me."
Vajpayee is thinking: "If this train goes through another tunnel, I could make another kissing sound and slap Musharraf again."
Gentle Typhoon
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^ wrong thread mate, post here - http://www.defence.pk/forums/general-images-multimedia/797-joke-64.html
Water Car Engineer
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Water Car Engineer
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Water Car Engineer
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CHARGER
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silent hill
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^^
hhhhhhhhhahahhahaha nice one
hhhhhhhhhahahhahaha nice one
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Musharraf comes to Delhi for a meeting with Vajpayee. After dinner, Vajpayee says to Musharraf: "Well Parvez, I don't know what you think of the members of your Cabinet, but mine are all bright and brilliant." "How do you know?" asks Musharraf "Oh well, it's simple", says Atal. " They all have to take special tests before they can be a minister. Wait a second".
He calls Advani over and asks him "Tell me Advaniji, who is the child of your father and of your mother who is not your brother and is not your sister?" "Ah, that's simple", says Advani, "it is me!" "Well done Advani", says Vajpayee and Musharraf is very impressed. He returns to Islamabad and wonders about the intelligence of the members of his Cabinet.
He calls in his favourite member of cabinet and asks: "Tell me, who is the child of your father and of your mother who is not your brother and is not your sister? " He thinks and thinks and doesn't know the answer. "Can I think about it a bit further Sir? May I let you know tomorrow? ". "Of course", says Musharraf, "You've got 24 hours."
He goes away, thinks as hard as he can, calls in his Cabinet Secretary, Chief Secretaries and Joint Secretaries, but no-one knows the answer.Twenty hours later, the member of Musharraf's cabinet is very worried-still no answer and only 4 hours to go. Eventually he says to himself: "I'll ask Bill Clinton, he's clever, he'll know the answer." He calls Clinton. "Mr.President", he says, "Tell me who is the child of your father and of your mother who is not your brother and is not your sister?" "Very simple", says Clinton, "It's me!"
"Wonderful!" says the Cabinet member and hangs up. Jumping with joy realizing that he knows the answer, he rings Musharraf. "Sir, I've got the answer!".
"What is it?"
"It's Bill Clinton".
"No, you idiot", says Musharraf, "It's Advani".
He calls Advani over and asks him "Tell me Advaniji, who is the child of your father and of your mother who is not your brother and is not your sister?" "Ah, that's simple", says Advani, "it is me!" "Well done Advani", says Vajpayee and Musharraf is very impressed. He returns to Islamabad and wonders about the intelligence of the members of his Cabinet.
He calls in his favourite member of cabinet and asks: "Tell me, who is the child of your father and of your mother who is not your brother and is not your sister? " He thinks and thinks and doesn't know the answer. "Can I think about it a bit further Sir? May I let you know tomorrow? ". "Of course", says Musharraf, "You've got 24 hours."
He goes away, thinks as hard as he can, calls in his Cabinet Secretary, Chief Secretaries and Joint Secretaries, but no-one knows the answer.Twenty hours later, the member of Musharraf's cabinet is very worried-still no answer and only 4 hours to go. Eventually he says to himself: "I'll ask Bill Clinton, he's clever, he'll know the answer." He calls Clinton. "Mr.President", he says, "Tell me who is the child of your father and of your mother who is not your brother and is not your sister?" "Very simple", says Clinton, "It's me!"
"Wonderful!" says the Cabinet member and hangs up. Jumping with joy realizing that he knows the answer, he rings Musharraf. "Sir, I've got the answer!".
"What is it?"
"It's Bill Clinton".
"No, you idiot", says Musharraf, "It's Advani".
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