Sharia in New Jersey: Muslim husband rapes wife, judge sees no sexual assault ...

[zagahaga]

A man has no ways of forceing himself upon a women iam surprised at how members are justifying his acts out of anger? What he did was WRONG and him justifying his acts based on islamic laws? That basterd probly dosent even pray 5 times a day nor reads quran . He only did it beacuse of saveing his ARSE pakistani members should know this. And tell me if you come home and you want to have intercorce with your wife and shes dosent you you force upon her this? Ill wouldent i have a wife iam married if iam tired and i want SEX but my wife dosent Ill go jerk off heck i wouldent gore my self upon her ! Maybe you guys arnt married yet or still are virgins ( i h ope)Maybe you guys dont know yet what it mean forceing yourself upon a women then jutifying it with religon . Disgusting

 

[mehru]

Stay single

Avoid personal attack or you will get the same. Maybe it's a funny matter for you but you have no idea that this is a serious matter. The reason that there are more rape cases in west is because they also consider it an act of rape and rightly so.

 

[mehru]

^ ego boy







man. u. have. left. me. for. no. words.
best. response. ever.

personal attack is not the best response. Someone resorts to it when he has nothing left to say.

 

[whocares]

by definition of 7th century arabian marital ethics, forced sex inside marriage isn't rape. some people like to live by those ethics. fair enough.

 

[RescueRanger]

There is a law against it in western countries as some American member pointed it out. There is no harm in considering it a crime. Abuse is an abuse. You can't justify it.

Spot on. There is no justification for a man treating a woman like a plaything to be used and discarded at will. Just because you sign a Nikahnama does not give you the right to treat your wife as a Rikhail.

Remember you are her chadur and she is yours. Learn to love, respect and cherish her. She is well within her rights to refuse if she is not willing.

Free will is Free will!

 

[DaRk WaVe]

The hadith at which you people are exploding is indeed a haidth in Sahi Bokhari

Sahi Bokhari 7:121 Muhammad said "If a man invites his wife to sleep with him and she refuses to come to him, then the angels send their curses on her till morning."

 

[shaka_shaka]

^ with_pilot_avatar

I apologize if I have caused you emotional damage. I did not mean to cause *you* emotional damage, I was merely mocking along, forgive my indecency as I am unwise and young. I was under the impression that you would not be bothered by such sentiments.

Still, I accept my mistake.

so, to begin with, i have searched the internet and i have found something interesting.

According to this website (or the aalim who runs it) I am going to quote below, Islam does not accept the right of a woman to refuse her husbands call for intimacy.

Husband forcing his wife to have intercourse
Is it permissible for a man to force his wife or slave to have intercourse if she refuses?.

Praise be to Allaah.

The woman does not have the right to refuse her husband, rather she must respond to his request every time he calls her, so long as that will not harm her or keep her from doing an obligatory duty.

Al-Bukhaari (3237) and Muslim (1436) narrated that Abu Hurayrah (may Allaah be pleased with him) said: The Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “If a man calls his wife to his bed and she refuses, and he spends the night angry with her, the angels curse her until morning.”

If she refuses with no excuse, she is disobeying and is being defiant (nushooz), and he is no longer obliged to spend on her and clothe her.

The husband should admonish her and remind her of the punishment of Allaah, and forsake her in her bed. He also has the right to hit her, in a manner that does not cause injury. Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):

“As to those women on whose part you see ill-conduct, admonish them (first), (next) refuse to share their beds, (and last) beat them (lightly, if it is useful); but if they return to obedience, seek not against them means (of annoyance). Surely, Allaah is Ever Most High, Most Great”

[al-Nisa’ 4:34]

Shaykh al-Islam Ibn Taymiyah (may Allaah have mercy on him) was asked what a husband should do if his wife refuses him when he asks for intimacy.

He replied:

It is not permissible for her to rebel against him or to withhold herself from him, rather if she refuses him and persists in doing so, he may hit her in a manner that does not cause injury, and she is not entitled to spending or a share of his time [in the case of plural marriage].” Majmoo’ al-Fataawa, 32/279.

And he was asked about a man who has a wife who is rebellious and refuses intimacy – does she forfeit the right to maintenance and clothing, and what should she do?

He replied:

She forfeits her right to maintenance and clothing if she does not let him be intimate with her. He has the right to hit her if she persists in being defiant. It is not permissible for her to refuse intimacy if he asks for that, rather she is disobeying Allaah and His Messenger (by refusing). In al-Saheeh it says: “If a man calls his wife to his bed and she refuses, the One Who is in heaven will be angry with her until morning comes.”

From Majmoo’ al-Fataawa, 32/278. The hadeeth was narrated by Muslim, 1736.

So the wife should be admonished first, and warned against defiance (nushooz) and of the anger of Allaah and the curse of the angels. If she does not respond, then the husband should forsake her in her bed, and if she does not respond to that, then he may hit her in a manner that does not cause injury. If none of these steps are effective, then he may stop spending on her maintenance and clothing, and he has the right to divorce her or to allow her to separate from him by khula’ in return for some financial settlement, such as giving up the mahr.

Similarly a slave woman does not have the right to refuse her master’s requests unless she has a valid excuse. If she does that she is being disobedient and he has the right to discipline her in whatever manner he thinks is appropriate and is allowed in sharee’ah.

And Allaah knows best.

link : Islam Question and Answer - Husband forcing his wife to have intercourse

i am also looking for other opinions by other scholars too, lets see if i find a different opinion.

 

[graphican]

Islamic view of this aspect - (As far a I know)

As far as I know, (and I could be wrong as not being a subject specialist, but still recalling from the matters I am aware of), it is obligatory for wife to satisfy her husband whenever he wants and refusing that would mean sevear gunnah. Having said that, it is unlawful for a husband to have sex with his own wife if she is not willing to and if he does so, he will earn gunnah. He cannot force her for that in anyway But in either case, that is not prosecutable crime but matter of azab-o-sawab.

Second, if a wife is not satisfied from her husband, in whatever means, she can take Talaq from him and merry somebody she likes. So it is not a compulsion for her to keep baring whatever her husband is doing to her. If she is unsatisfied from him, even for emotional reasons, she can take Talaq. So everybody is secure and everything is in balance by law.

 

[EgO Boy]

personal attack is not the best response. Someone resorts to it when he has nothing left to say.

I have a lot to say madam, but i dont want to turn this thread into a war zone between socalled librals and socalled islamist's.

So iam taking it lightly, sorry if i offended you.

 

[shaka_shaka]

exactly! darkwave has hit the nail in the head.

the word is "invite" , in that case the women knew that the husband wanted intimacy and she is refusing.

when a man feels like being intimate, and is denied, this causes severe degrees of depression and damage. im sure many men here would second my opinion.

anyways, i have been able to come up with a different opinion, well not different rather from another angle as compared the one i posted above.

its rather long. i hope the mods dont delete it. and it explains a lot of things.

“If a man calls his wife to bed and she refuses, and then he sleeps angry, the angels shall curse her until he awakens.” [an unquestionably authentic hadith, related by both Bukhari and Muslims, as well as numerous others]



Islam is an religion of peace, and honours women. There are many hadith about the good treatment of women.



Unfortunately some igonarant muslim men think they can force their wives to have sex with them. They argue that ‘since it is obligatory for a women to respond to her husbands call to have sex , they can force their wives to have sex with them if they refuse their request’



This is wrong and this sort of behaviour has no place in Islam!



Refuting their weak argument (and explaining the hadith in question):



If something is obligatory to do for a muslim, does this mean we are allowed to force a muslim to do so, if he/she doesnt perform the obligated things in Islam.



Like for example, it is obligatory for a muslim to pray 5 times a day, does this mean we can force and abuse/ torture a muslim to peform his prayer?



If someone doesnt fast during Ramadan, are we muslims allowed to force him to do? Of course not. The prophet (swa) never forced anyone to do something.



We know it is obligatory for a person to follow the religion of Islam if he/she wants to get to Jannah, so can we (even out of love or mercy) force non-muslims into islam?



2:256 There is no compulsion in religion, for the right way is clearly from the wrong way. Whoever therefore rejects the forces of evil and believes in God, he has taken hold of a support most unfailing, which shall never give way, for God is All Hearing and Knowing.



So Allah swt makes clear that we cannot force others to our religion. So if we can’t force non-muslims to islam (to save them from hell) then how can it be allowed to force our own brothers and sisters in islam to do certain religious dutys? Off course we must warn them for committing a sin, and we are obligated to help them and to forbid them what is wrong, but every person in islam is responsible for his own deeds, at the end it’s a persons own choice to decide which thing to do, as muslims brothers and sisters we have to do all we can to save them from sins or evil deeds, but we can’t force them. It’s their own choice which thing to do at the end. Allah swt will judge us on our intentions, a persons real intention comes only out when there is free-will and free-choice in religion. Thats why Allah swt allowed free-will and free-choice in Islam (Allah swt knows best)



So when the prophet said: "If a man invites his wife to sleep with him and she refuses, then the angels send their curses on her till morning “

Does this mean the husband can force his wive into sex/marital rape ? Noooooooo!



The wife clearly knows that she is wrong, when she rejects her husband request (she should fullfil his sexuel needs). But the husband can’t compulse or force his wife into sex/marital rape. The husband has the right to insist that she should fullfil his right, and the husband has the right to be angry at her for this (in a proper way), even the husband has the right to divorce her when she repeatedly refuses his request, however he still hasn’t the right in Islam to force her into sex/marital rape !, if he had the right to do, then certainly the prophet would mention it, but the prophet didn’t. The reason for this is that forcing someone doesn’t belong and doesn’t fit in the peacefull teachings of Islam.





Islam is clear about rules and punishment. For major sins like fornication , rape, murder and theft , there are physical punishments. However when it comes to issues like ‘not performing the 5 daily prayers’ or ‘not fasting during ramadan’ or ‘not fullfilling the sexual needs of one’s spouse’ etc. then a person will be held responsible for his own deeds on the day of judgement. Allah swt will judge a person by his own deeds, all the sins committed by the person during his earthly life will count in his judgement by Allah swt, based on this Allah swt (and not the husband !) will decide which reward and/or which punishment a person will get.





Further the hadith in question clearly states at the end: “If a husband calls his wife to his bed (i.e. to have sexual relation) and she refuses and causes him to sleep in anger, the angels will curse her till the morning.”



So no where in the hadith, is the husband giving any right to force his wife into sex, instead the hadith clearly mentions, that when the husband spends the night in anger (this is another proof that makes clear that a husband can’t force his wife to have sex, because how can a husband spend the night in anger sexually depressed, if he had the right and could force his wive to fullfill his sexuel needs?? This cleary poofs that a muslim husband doesn’t have the right to force his wife into sex with him) , the angels will curse his wife (with curse is ment: Allah swt wont hear or answer her prayer till the morning) , so the punishment for the wife’s sin is clearly mentioned in the hadith, the angels will curse her ( her prayer won’t be heard by Allah swt) , no where does the hadith gives any idea of forcing or physical punishment.





Secondly:



It is well know that forcing someone to sex in almost all cases goes together with bringing physcial and/or emotional harm to a person, if a husband beats/scares his wife to force her to have sex, then he clearly abuses his wife physical and emotional. In this case the husband will commit a major sin, he’s violating the sunnah of the prophet swa and the law of Allah swt in the Quran:



There shall be no infliction of harm on oneself or others". (Related by Al-Daraqutni, Ibn Majah and Ahmad.)

O ye who believe! Ye are forbidden to inherit women against their will. Nor should ye treat them with harshness, that ye may take away part of the dower [money given by the husband to the wife for the marriage contract] ye have given them, except where they have been guilty of open lewdness; on the contrary live with them on a footing of kindness and equity. If ye take a dislike to them it may be that ye dislike a thing, and God brings about through it a great deal of good (Qu’ran An-nisa 19)

* A muslim husband is forbidden to harm or abuse his wife! He has to act kindly towards his wife:



Abu Huraira (Allah be pleased with him) reported Allah's Apostle (may peace be upon him) as saying: "He who believes in Allah and the Hereafter, if he witnesses any matter he should talk in good terms about it or keep quiet. Act kindly towards woman, for woman is created from a rib, and the most crooked part of the rib is its top. If you attempt to straighten it, you will break it, and if you leave it, its crookedness will remain there. So act kindly towards women. (Translation of Sahih Muslim, The Book of Marriage (Kitab Al-Nikah), Book 008, Number 3468)"



As we explained before, it is well known that forcing someone into sex in almost all cases goes together with physical and/or emotional harm, which is stricty forbidden in Islam.





* A muslim husband should control his anger at his wife. Forcing someone into sex/martial rape is using anger! A husband should never act this way !



Narrated Abu Huraira: "A man said to the Prophet , 'Advise me! 'The Prophet said, 'Do not become angry and furious.' The man asked (the same) again and again, and the Prophet said in each case, 'Do not become angry and furious.' (Translation of Sahih Bukhari, Good Manners and Form (Al-Adab), Volume 8, Book 73, Number 137)"

Narrated Abu Huraira: "Allah's Apostle said, 'The strong is not the one who overcomes the people by his strength, but the strong is the one who controls himself while in anger. (Translation of Sahih Bukhari, Good Manners and Form (Al-Adab), Volume 8, Book 73, Number 135)"



* In almost all cases (especially when it comes to sex) forcing someone into sex/marital rape goes together with: ‘cursing, or using bad words’

A Muslim would neither abuse nor speak bad words to, nor curse others.’ (Sahih Muslim)



* the Prophet directed husbands how they should approach their wifes, He said: “None of you should fall upon his wife like an animal; but let there first be a messenger between you.” The Companions exclaimed, “What is that messenger?” The Prophet replied, “Kisses and (romantic) words!” (Reported by Al-Daylami)



It is impossible for a husband who forces his wife to have sex with him (marital rape) to approach her in this way. How can an angry forcing husband bring romance (romantic words ,kissing) and love to his wife by forcing her into sex ? It’s obvious that a husband who forces his wife to have sex with him more resembles a wild animal then a romantic lover, the prophet clearly directed to the husbands: ‘None of you should fall upon his wife like an animal’

Also:



Imam Ibn al-Qayyim (Allah have mercy on him) reports in his famous “Tibb al-Nabawi” that the Messenger of Allah (Allah bless him & give him peace) forbade from engaging in sexual intercourse before foreplay. (See: al-Tibb al-Nabawi, 183, from Jabir ibn Abd Allah)



Sexual Rights of the Wife

Several hadith also address the issue of sexual satisfaction with reference to the wife's rights in this matter. The Prophet advised Abdullah bin Amr bin Al-As (who spent all day fasting and all night in prayer) to fast sometimes and not at other times; to pray at night and to sleep at night. "Your body has a right over you, your eyes have a right over you and your wife has a right over you." (Bukhari, Vol.7, No. 127) The wife's rights include a right to companionship from her husband and fulfillment of her sexual needs.



Rights of the Husband

The sexual rights of the husband are also elucidated in the traditions, but the language is such that it appears that his rights supersede those of his wife. For example, in Bukhari, AbuHuraira reports that the Prophet said, "If a man invites his wife to sleep with him and she refuses, then the angels send their curses on her till morning." (Vol. 7, No. 121-2; in Muslim, the text reads that God is displeased with her until the husband is pleased with her Nos. 3366-68).

Since the husband's urges are so strong, and to prevent him from acting out on them illicitly, a wife's duty therefore is to submit (but cannot be forced) in order to preserve the marriage. Yet, human beings are endowed with self control not seen in any other species, such that we do not act on every instinctual impulse because of some uncontrollable force. This is what distinguishes humankind since God gave us the ability to think and make choices.

Therefore, there is no justification for forcing women to have sex against their will, even in marriage. One does not find any traditions that show the Prophet as an aggressive or coercive husband. Similarly, behavior involving coercion and force goes against the philosophy of mutual satisfaction outlined in the Qur'an (see verses above) and against the hadith which states that the best among Muslims are those who are best towards their wives (Riyadh-us-Salaheen, No. 278). Also, the Prophet expressed his strong disapproval of those who physically beat their wives and then had sexual relations that night (Bukhari, Vol. 7, No. 132, Vol.9, 81-82; see also Riyadh us-Salaheen, No. 274).



Since we have proven that a husband can’t force his wife into sex ( he has to right to insist or demand, but cannot force his wife, if his wife refuses, her prayer wont be heard by allah, if a wife repeatedly refuses her husbands request to join him in bed , then the husband has the right to divorce his wife instead of forcing his wife to sex , forcing a wife will only bring damage to a marriage relationship between spouses)



I also wanne point out that Islam is a religion of free will and free choice, forcing someone contradicts the concept of free-will and free-choice in Islam



surat Al-Isra', (Verse 15), , "Whoever goes right, then he goes right only for the benefit of his ownself. And whoever goes astray, then he goes astray to his own loss. No one laden with burdens can bear another’s burden…"



urat Fussilat, (Verse 46), what can be translated as, "Whosoever does righteous good deed it is for (the benefit of) his ownself, and whosoever does evil, it is against his ownself, and your Lord is not at all unjust to (His) slaves."





Finally i like to point out that Allah swt in the Quran commands ‘just behaviour’ and a husband should live with his wife ‘on a footing of kindness and equity’ , forcing a wife into sex /martial rape is clearly a sin and breaks Allah’s command ‘ live with them on a footing of kindness and equity’ , Allah swt will punsih the wrongdoers and injust people!



{O ye who believe! Ye are forbidden to inherit women against their will. Nor should ye treat them with harshness, that ye may take away part of the dower [money given by the husband to the wife for the marriage contract] ye have given them, except where they have been guilty of open lewdness; on the contrary live with them on a footing of kindness and equity. If ye take a dislike to them it may be that ye dislike a thing, and God brings about through it a great deal of good.} ( Qu’ran An-nisa 19)



Allah swt does not stop at warning against corruption; he also points out the right way. He instructs the Prophet Say: ‘My Lord has commanded you to be just’ (Quran 7:29), meaning to be fair and moderate in all matters without going into either extreme



Allah swt commands in the Qur'an: "O ye who believe! Stand out firmly for Allah, as witnesses to fair dealing, and let not the hatred of others to you make you swerve to wrong and depart from justice. Be just: that is next to Piety: and fear Allah. For Allah is well-acquainted with all that ye do." [Quran ,Al-Maidah 5:8]

here is the link.
'
No Muslim man can force his wife into sex!

 

[EgO Boy]

The hadith at which you people are exploding is indeed a haidth in Sahi Bokhari

Sahi Bokhari 7:121 Muhammad said "If a man invites his wife to sleep with him and she refuses to come to him, then the angels send their curses on her till morning."

thanks for ur royal confarmation, ur holy highness's.
but pls inlight us on the subject of this thread, thanks.

 

[graphican]

by definition of 7th century arabian marital ethics, forced sex inside marriage isn't rape. some people like to live by those ethics. fair enough.

If they are laws of Sharia, those are meant to exist for a trillion years as foundations doesn't change, even after 700 years as you are putting it. Fundamental elements of mathematics are still the same, even after 12000 years, do you want to have new numbers added to someday? or have a new form of "truth"? Fundamentals doesn't, they always stay as useful as they were at the time of formation.

 

[SiegHeil]

shut thr fcuk up, do you want me to start bashing Hinduim? Dont make comments on Hadiths, understand me now or dont cry later

Go ahead bash hinduism .
Brother I dont have knowledge about hadiths but if their teachings go against humanity you must question them too.

 

[DaRk WaVe]

thanks for ur royal confarmation, ur holy highness's.
but pls inlight us on the subject of this thread, thanks.

Forcing in any case is wrong

People use religion to justify many things

 

[desiman]

simple thing - If a women does not want it, its means no. No religion no excuse, the more we politicize every aspect of our lifes the more complicated things will get. If she does not want it, it wont be a fun experience anyways, if you so desperate go jack of in front of a computer or something. Women are something to cherish not use. Stop pushing religion into everything.