Joke

[Respect4Respect01]

its hilarious, even spelling mistakes made me laugh.

 

[S.U.R.B.]

I thought this was halarous

Some years back that blonde was going to California, as pointed by our veteran Muradk....

BTW where is Muradk? ,never seen him around for a long time.I hope he's doing well.

 

[BlackenTheSky]

Govtt.- Jinke 5 Bachhe hain Sarkar unko Ghar Degi,
Santa k 3 the, Usne Wife se Kaha,-Padosan k 2 mere hain unko lata hoon,

(Lane k baad)- Apne 3 kaha gaye????

Wife- Jinke the wo le gaye,,

 

[Sugarcane]

I went fishing this morning but after a short time I ran out of worms. Then I saw a cottonmouth with a frog in his mouth. Frogs are good bass bait.

Knowing the snake couldn't bite me with the frog in his mouth I grabbed him right behind the head, took the frog, and put it in my bait bucket.

Now the dilemma was how to release the snake without getting bit. So, I grabbed my bottle of Jack Daniels and poured a little whiskey in its mouth. His eyes rolled back, he went limp.

I released him into the lake without incident and carried on fishing using the frog.

A little later, I felt a nudge on my foot. It was that snake, with two more frogs.

 

[Sugarcane]

A farmer drove to a neighbor's farmhouse and knocked at the door.
A boy, about 9, opened the door
"Is your dad or mom home?" said the farmer.
"No, they went to town."
"How about your brother, Howard? Is he here?"
"No, he went with Mom and Dad."
The farmer stood there for a few minutes, shifting from one foot to the other,and mumbling
to himself.
"I know where all the tools are, if you want to borrow one, or I can give Dad a message."
"Well," said the farmer uncomfortably, "I really wanted to talk to your Dad. It's about your
brother Howard getting my daughter Suzy pregnant".
The boy thought for a moment...

"You would have to talk to Dad about that. I know he charges $500 for the bull and $50 for
the pig, but I don't know how much he charges for Howard."

 

[Sugarcane]

Two women were playing golf. One teed off and watched in horror as her ball headed directly toward a foursome of men playing the next hole.

The ball hit one of the men. He immediately clasped his hands together at his groin, fell to the ground and proceeded to roll around in agony.

The woman rushed down to the man, and immediately began to apologize. 'Please allow me to help. I'm a Physiotherapist and I know I could relieve your pain if you'd only allow me,' she told him.

'Oh, no, I'll be all right. I'll be fine in a few minutes,' the man replied. He was in obvious agony, lying in the fetal position, still clasping his hands there at his groin.

At her persistence, however, he finally allowed her to help. She gently took his hands away and laid them to the side, loosened his trousers and put her hands slowly and carefully inside. She then administered a tender and skillful massage for several long moments and softly asked, 'How does that feel'?

Feels wonderful, he replied; but I still think my thumb's broken!

 

[Fireaxe888]

A guy is waiting for a green light in his car. Suddenly, someone raps on his window and pokes his head in.

"I'm sorry, but we need your help. A terrorist group have kidnapped the Prime Minister and say they will burn him alive with petrol unless they have a million dollars in a week.", he says.

"How much have you got so far?", the driver asks.

"Around 20 litres".

 

[Sugarcane]

A man was sitting reading his papers when his wife hit him round the head with a frying pan.
'What was that for?' the man asked.
The wife replied 'That was for the piece of paper with the name Jenny on it that I found in your pants pocket'..
The man then said 'When I was at the races last week Jenny was the name of the horse I bet on' the wife apologized and went on with the housework..
Three days later the man is watching TV when his wife bashes him on the head with an even bigger frying pan, knocking him unconscious.
Upon re-gaining consciousness the man asked why she had hit again.
Wife replied.. 'Your horse phoned'

 

[Developereo]

A woman is in the house when her husband walks in with a duck under his arm.

The man says, "this is the pig I have been screwing for the last ten years."
"That's a duck", says the woman.
"I was talking to the duck", says the man.

 

[Sugarcane]

A Methodist preacher said, "Anyone with 'special needs' who wants to be prayed over, please come forward to the front by the altar."

With that, Tyrone got in line. When it was his turn, the Preacher asked, "Tyrone, what do you want me to pray about for you?"

Tyrone replied, "Preacher, I need you to pray for help with my hearing." The preacher put one finger of one hand in Tyrone's ear, placed his other hand on top of Tyrone's head, and then prayed and prayed and prayed. He prayed a "blue streak" for Tyrone, and the whole congregation joined in with great enthusiasm.

After a few minutes, the preacher removed his hands, stood back and asked, "Tyrone, how is your hearing now?"

Tyrone answered, "I don't know, Man. It ain't 'til next week."

 

[lem34]

ARABIC GUYS GET SCARED OF A SNAKE - YouTube

 

[Last Hope]

ARABIC GUYS GET SCARED OF A SNAKE - YouTube

Tash Ma Tash.

I recommend everyone to watch this TV serial, and it is enjoyable even if you don't understand Arabic

 

[Respect4Respect01]

LOL even im scared of snaked, only snakes.

 

[Zulkarneyn]

Main difference between girls and boys

 

[S.M.R]

Especially for Lala Pukhtoon:

A pathan goes for job interview.

interviewer asked, "kitnay saloon ka experience hai".

Pathan said: "3 saloon ka"

Waisay to 2 saaliaan bhi hain, but i am not interested in them.