Joke
- Thread starter EagleEyes
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Janbaz
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Owais
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TWO SARDARS FOUNG TWO EXPLOSIVES BOMBS !!
1st SARDAR : Chal yaar Police ko de daite hain ...
2nd SARDAR : Agar bomb rastey mae phaat gya tou .. ?
1st SARDAR : Tou yaar jhoot bool dain ge ...
2nd SARDAR: kia ... ?
1st SARDAR : k hamein tou aik he mila tha ....
1st SARDAR : Chal yaar Police ko de daite hain ...
2nd SARDAR : Agar bomb rastey mae phaat gya tou .. ?
1st SARDAR : Tou yaar jhoot bool dain ge ...
2nd SARDAR: kia ... ?
1st SARDAR : k hamein tou aik he mila tha ....
Contrarian
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Two men dressed in Pilots' uniforms walk up the aisle of the plane.
Both are wearing dark glasses, one is using a guide dog, and the
other is tapping his way along the aisle with a cane.
Nervous laughter spreads through the cabin, but the men enter the
cockpit,the door closes, and the engines start up. The passengers begin
glancing nervously around, searching for some sign that this is just a
little practical joke. None is forthcoming. The plane moves faster and
faster down the runway and the people sitting in the window seats
realize
they're headed straight for the water at the edge of the airport.
As it begins to look as though the plane will plough into the
water,
panicked screams fill the cabin. At that moment, the plane lifts
smoothly
into the air. The passengers relax and laugh a little sheepishly, and
soon all retreat into their magazines, secure in the knowledge that the
plane is in good hands.
In the cockpit, one of the blind pilots turns to the other and
says,
.....
"You know, Bob, one of these days, they're gonna scream too late
and we're all gonna' die.
Both are wearing dark glasses, one is using a guide dog, and the
other is tapping his way along the aisle with a cane.
Nervous laughter spreads through the cabin, but the men enter the
cockpit,the door closes, and the engines start up. The passengers begin
glancing nervously around, searching for some sign that this is just a
little practical joke. None is forthcoming. The plane moves faster and
faster down the runway and the people sitting in the window seats
realize
they're headed straight for the water at the edge of the airport.
As it begins to look as though the plane will plough into the
water,
panicked screams fill the cabin. At that moment, the plane lifts
smoothly
into the air. The passengers relax and laugh a little sheepishly, and
soon all retreat into their magazines, secure in the knowledge that the
plane is in good hands.
In the cockpit, one of the blind pilots turns to the other and
says,
.....
"You know, Bob, one of these days, they're gonna scream too late
and we're all gonna' die.
Contrarian
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> > One for those of us that struggle with weight loss:
> >
> > A guy calls a company and orders their 5-day, 10 lb. weight loss
> > program.
> >
> > The next day, there's a knock on the door and there stands before him a
> > voluptuous, athletic, 19 year old babe dressed in nothing but a pair of
> > Nike
> > running shoes and a sign round her neck. She introduces herself as a
> > representative of the weight loss company.
> >
> > The sign reads: "If you can catch me, you can have me."
> >
> > Without a second thought, he takes off after her. A few miles later,
> > huffing
> > and puffing, he finally catches her and has his way with her. The same
> > girl
> > shows up for the next four days and the same thing happens.
> >
> > On the fifth day, he weighs himself and is delighted to find he has lost
> > 10lb. as promised.
> >
> > He then calls the company and orders their 5-day/20 pound program.
> >
> > The next day there's a knock at the door and there stands the most
> > stunning,
> > beautiful, sexy woman he has ever seen in his life. She is wearing
> > nothing
> > but Reebok running shoes and a sign around her neck that reads: "If you
> > catch me you can have me."
> >
> > Well, he's out the door after her like a shot! This girl is in excellent
> > shape and it takes him a while to catch her but when he does, it's
> > definitely worth every muscle cramp and wheeze, so for the next four
> > days,
> > the same routine happens.
> >
> > Much to his delight, on the fifth day he weighs himself only to discover
> > that he has lost another 20lb as promised.
> >
> > He decides to go for broke and calls the company to order the 7-day/50
> > pound
> > program. "Are you sure?" asks the representative on the phone "This is
> > our
> > most rigorous program."
> >
> > "Absolutely," he replies, "I haven't felt this good in years." The next
> > day
> > there's a knock at the door; when he opens it he finds this huge,
> > muscular,
> > 7ft black man standing there wearing nothing but pink running shoes and
> > a
> > sign around his neck that reads: "I'm Francis. If I catch you, you're
> > mine..."
> >
> > A guy calls a company and orders their 5-day, 10 lb. weight loss
> > program.
> >
> > The next day, there's a knock on the door and there stands before him a
> > voluptuous, athletic, 19 year old babe dressed in nothing but a pair of
> > Nike
> > running shoes and a sign round her neck. She introduces herself as a
> > representative of the weight loss company.
> >
> > The sign reads: "If you can catch me, you can have me."
> >
> > Without a second thought, he takes off after her. A few miles later,
> > huffing
> > and puffing, he finally catches her and has his way with her. The same
> > girl
> > shows up for the next four days and the same thing happens.
> >
> > On the fifth day, he weighs himself and is delighted to find he has lost
> > 10lb. as promised.
> >
> > He then calls the company and orders their 5-day/20 pound program.
> >
> > The next day there's a knock at the door and there stands the most
> > stunning,
> > beautiful, sexy woman he has ever seen in his life. She is wearing
> > nothing
> > but Reebok running shoes and a sign around her neck that reads: "If you
> > catch me you can have me."
> >
> > Well, he's out the door after her like a shot! This girl is in excellent
> > shape and it takes him a while to catch her but when he does, it's
> > definitely worth every muscle cramp and wheeze, so for the next four
> > days,
> > the same routine happens.
> >
> > Much to his delight, on the fifth day he weighs himself only to discover
> > that he has lost another 20lb as promised.
> >
> > He decides to go for broke and calls the company to order the 7-day/50
> > pound
> > program. "Are you sure?" asks the representative on the phone "This is
> > our
> > most rigorous program."
> >
> > "Absolutely," he replies, "I haven't felt this good in years." The next
> > day
> > there's a knock at the door; when he opens it he finds this huge,
> > muscular,
> > 7ft black man standing there wearing nothing but pink running shoes and
> > a
> > sign around his neck that reads: "I'm Francis. If I catch you, you're
> > mine..."
A.Rahman
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A priest offered a Nun a lift. She got in and crossed her legs, forcing her gown to reveal a leg. The priest nearly had an accident.
After controlling the car, he stealthily slid his hand up her leg. The nun said, "Father, remember Psalm 129?" The priest removed his hand.
But, changing gears, he let his hand slide up her leg again. The nun once again said, "Father, remember Psalm 129?" The priest apologized "Sorry sister but the flesh is weak."
Arriving at the convent, the nun went on her way.
On his arrival at the church, the priest rushed to look up Psalm 129. It said, "Go forth and seek, further up, you will find glory."
After controlling the car, he stealthily slid his hand up her leg. The nun said, "Father, remember Psalm 129?" The priest removed his hand.
But, changing gears, he let his hand slide up her leg again. The nun once again said, "Father, remember Psalm 129?" The priest apologized "Sorry sister but the flesh is weak."
Arriving at the convent, the nun went on her way.
On his arrival at the church, the priest rushed to look up Psalm 129. It said, "Go forth and seek, further up, you will find glory."
Bull
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A priest offered a Nun a lift. She got in and crossed her legs, forcing her gown to reveal a leg. The priest nearly had an accident.
After controlling the car, he stealthily slid his hand up her leg. The nun said, "Father, remember Psalm 129?" The priest removed his hand.
But, changing gears, he let his hand slide up her leg again. The nun once again said, "Father, remember Psalm 129?" The priest apologized "Sorry sister but the flesh is weak."
Arriving at the convent, the nun went on her way.
On his arrival at the church, the priest rushed to look up Psalm 129. It said, "Go forth and seek, further up, you will find glory."
Wow the best.
Contrarian
ELITE MEMBER
- Joined
- Oct 23, 2006
- Messages
- 11,571
- Reaction score
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A priest offered a Nun a lift. She got in and crossed her legs, forcing her gown to reveal a leg. The priest nearly had an accident.
After controlling the car, he stealthily slid his hand up her leg. The nun said, "Father, remember Psalm 129?" The priest removed his hand.
But, changing gears, he let his hand slide up her leg again. The nun once again said, "Father, remember Psalm 129?" The priest apologized "Sorry sister but the flesh is weak."
Arriving at the convent, the nun went on her way.
On his arrival at the church, the priest rushed to look up Psalm 129. It said, "Go forth and seek, further up, you will find glory."
ROFL! Nice 1 dude!!
Janbaz
SENIOR MEMBER
- Joined
- Aug 16, 2006
- Messages
- 1,305
- Reaction score
- 0
A priest offered a Nun a lift. She got in and crossed her legs, forcing her gown to reveal a leg. The priest nearly had an accident.
After controlling the car, he stealthily slid his hand up her leg. The nun said, "Father, remember Psalm 129?" The priest removed his hand.
But, changing gears, he let his hand slide up her leg again. The nun once again said, "Father, remember Psalm 129?" The priest apologized "Sorry sister but the flesh is weak."
Arriving at the convent, the nun went on her way.
On his arrival at the church, the priest rushed to look up Psalm 129. It said, "Go forth and seek, further up, you will find glory."
Classical, needs to be saved for reference!
