The situation is quite complicated and we have to look at how it came to be...Taliban and Al Qaeda are not the same and this is what Pakistan has always maintained...
The Taliban might be very harsh and totalitarian and i totally disagree with most of their interpretation of Islam...but there is a reason they spread so fast in Afghanistan and we need to examine that reason which is entirely local in its nature and cannot be entirely understood by the people in developed countries who have jobs, education, social security, good infrastructure and food to fill their bellies...
After the Afghan Jihad the Mujahideen, Warlords and the drug barons all started to fight each other in a civil war which caused unprecedented destruction.
It led to a situation whereby the ordinary Afghan could not travel a few kilometers without having to encounter different law of the land at the hands of a different lord of the land...due to the chaos and lawlessness the situation was unbearable and the people suffered a lot both physically and mentally.
When the Taliban came and promised to deliver the people of this misery they were supported by the locals in each area and that is the sole reason that lead Taliban to capture so many provinces at a record rate...mostly the local war lords had to bend their knees when they saw that the Taliban were supported by the people.
Taliban did ensure a single set of laws (no matter how crude the civilized world sees them) and a central government which offered a much more stable life (of course this has to be compared with the post Afghan Jihad instability and is relevant in Afghanistan only).
Now i hated many Taliban actions and atrocities during their war but i know that after they had controlled the area, a person could travel there without fear of harassment as long as the Taliban law was observed...a giant leap from the previous regime under which the entire set of rules changed every mile and there were
tax collectors lurking around every mountain...
The difference is that as opposed to a Somalia like chaos which was prevalent in Afghanistan, the Taliban ensured some order even if they are called very harsh enforcers.
I remember that the Saudis were very harsh as well but over a long period of time they have become much more mellow...they used to treat women harshly too but i have been there many times and it has changed tremendously now...in the long run the Taliban could have gone this way on their own as well...but this is my hypothesis...it could have been that they would have become highly unpopular and the people would have come out in the streets but even in this case they could have learnt their lesson and changed.
Anyways, in a post Taliban era the transition of thought could have occurred more smoothly since there was a central government in Afghanistan (barring the northern alliance area), stability is a prerequisite to nation building and compared to post Afghan Jihad era the Taliban gave stability...
They were not angels and certainly their interpretation of Shariah is very crude and impractical...however there was a chance that with passage of time and help from the world...there can be reconstruction in Afghanistan.
Come 9-11 the USA went after Al Qaeda but in doing so the Taliban and Al Qaeda were branded as the same, to me this was a huge mistake and has only resulted in making Al Qaeda stronger...Once the US landed in Afghanistan not just the Taliban but many Afghans saw this as a direct attack on Afghanistan and so the resistance of Taliban has been supported by many...
Yes the Taliban also displayed a lack of understanding and certainly a lack of diplomacy but then again i would like to emphasize that the US too opted to threaten Taliban into giving up Osama without any trial or face total war...knowing how proud Afghans are and having spent a good decade in this area, the US too could have opted to display more flexibility and understanding about how the things work here and how Osama was once part of the Mujahideen and how he had helped Taliban financially when they were desperate to manage the government...the Taliban needed to display some control even in handing over Osama to USA but this was denied even when they agreed to trial Osama in Afghanistan (was at least a big progress from the non commitment earlier)...the U.N. could have chosen to sit in the trial as well had this been given more serious thought...
The Taliban were certainly not graduates of Harvard and even many Muslims disagree with their interpretation of Islam but when they asked for evidence and offered to hold a trial for Osama in Afghanistan...most of the world and the media ridiculed them and the USA was absolutely unwilling to listen...
CNN.com - U.S. rejects Taliban offer to try bin Laden - October 7, 2001
so i have to say that not all efforts were exhausted before launching the attack...the Taliban were under extreme pressure and could have given in to this pressure...their offer to try Osama should have been taken seriously because they also knew the threat that the US posed and this stance was very different from the previous stance of Pashtun and Tribal honor which they cited as an inability to oust a guest from their country...in my view they were buckling under the pressure so the pressure should have been sustained but instead war was launched and it only helped Al Qaeda.
The crude Buddha statue stunt only signified that the Taliban desperately needed the money to run Afghanistan and resorted to such antics out of sheer desperation...there is no denying that Afghanistan was suffering tremendously due to lack of infrastructure, food, health facilities etc.
The post Afghan Jihad reconstruction never did happen so there was a constant decay in Afghanistan...however to sustain any reconstruction effort the Taliban at least offered a solution in terms of central government and authority...the fact that Osama was in Afghanistan and had cash only complicated the situation...however i still believe that Taliban and Osama were not same and despite the marriage of necessity, it was possible to separate the two.
I feel that in this regards there was no real sustained effort made and all avenues were not exhausted, this is my view especially when i see that in the end the Taliban were compromising on their stance in wake of the threat...
Now if the US wants to talk to them, it is a good thing...however in any such step Pakistan should play a key role as well since the stability in Afghanistan is not only critical to our well being but also the complications that have occurred have caused a great instability in Pakistan as well.
Pakistan has to be a peace broker so as to ensure that in the long run, even if US exits...Pakistan is not seen in a negative light by the Afghans...