how would you know you are doing it right...
I use it mostly for my own educational purpose 
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To Find Freedom from **** Addiction: Recognize the Lies
You can't learn the truth about sex from pornography. It doesn't deal in truth. Pornography is not made to educate, but to sell. So, pornography will tell whatever lies attract and hold the audience. **** thrives on lies -- lies about sex, women, marriage and a lot of other things. Let's look at some of those lies and see just how badly they can mess up your life and attitudes.
Lie #1 - Women are less than human
The women in Playboy magazine are called "bunnies," making them cute little animals or "playmates," making them a toy. Penthouse magazine calls them "pets." **** often refers to women as animals, playthings, or body parts. Some pornography shows only the body or the genitals and doesn't show the face at all. The idea that women are real human beings with thoughts and emotions is played down.
Lie #2 - Women are a "sport"
Some sports magazines have a "swimsuit" issue. This suggests that women are just some kind of sport. **** views sex as a game and in a game, you have to "win," "conquer," or "score." Men who buy into this view like to talk about "scoring" with women. They start judging their manhood by how many "conquests" they can make. Each woman I "score" with is another trophy on my shelf, another "notch" in my belt to validate my masculinity.
Lie #3 - Women are property
We've all seen the pictures of the slick car with the sexy girl draped over it.
The unspoken message, "Buy one, and you get them both." Hard-core **** carries this even further. It displays women like merchandise in a catalog, exposing them as openly as possible for the customer to look at. It's not surprising that many young men think that if they have spent some money taking a girl out, they have a right to have sex with her. **** tells us that women can be bought.
Lie #4 - A woman's value depends on the attractiveness of her body
Less attractive women are ridiculed in ****. They are called dogs, whales, pigs or worse, simply because they don't fit into ****'s criteria of the "perfect" woman. **** doesn't care about a woman's mind or personality, only her body.
Lie #5 - Women like rape
"When she says no, she means yes" is a typical **** scenario. Women are shown being raped, fighting and kicking at first, and then starting to like it. **** teaches men to enjoying hurting and abusing women for entertainment.
Lie #6 - Women should be degraded
**** is often full of hate speech against women. Women are shown being tortured and humiliated in hundreds of sick ways and begging for more. Does this kind of treatment show any respect for women? Any love? Or is it hatred and contempt that **** is promoting toward women?
Lie #7 - Little kids should have sex
One of the biggest sellers in pornography is imitation "child" ****. The women are "made-up" to look like little girls by wearing pony tails, little girl shoes, holding a teddy bear. The message of the pictures and cartoons is that adults having sex with kids is normal. This sets the **** user up to see children in a sexual way.
Lie #8 - Illegal sex is fun
**** often has illegal or dangerous elements thrown in to make sex more "interesting." It suggests that you can't enjoy sex if it isn't weird, illegal or dangerous.
Lie #9 - Prostitution is glamorous
**** paints an exciting picture of prostitution. In reality, many of the women portrayed in pornographic material are runaway girls trapped in a life of slavery. Many having been sexually abused. Some of them are infected with incurable sexually transmitted diseases that are highly contagious and often die very young. Many take drugs just to cope.
Bottom Line of **** Addiction
Pornography makes a profit from the ruined lives of young women and entraps men who will spend lots of time AND money succumbing to their product.
We might think that the things we see and hear don't affect us. Yet we all admit that good music, good movies and good books add a lot to our lives. They can relax us, educate us, move us or inspire us. Just as uplifting media can benefit us, pornographic images can negatively affect us.
What are the effects of pornography on a man?
What kinds of ideas is **** putting into our heads? If the wrong things keep getting dumped in, your mental environment can get so polluted that your life is going to have problems. One of the most vital parts of mental environment is a healthy idea of who we are sexually. If these ideas are polluted, a critical part of who we are becomes twisted.
**** Addiction: The Pull of Pornography
Not everyone who sees **** will become addicted. Some will just come away with toxic ideas about women, sex, marriage, and children. However, some will have some kind of emotional opening that allows the addiction to really grab hold
. The **** companies don't mind at all if you become completely addicted to their product. It's great for business. Dr. Victor Cline has divided the progress of addiction into several stages; addiction, escalation, desensitization, and acting out. For **** addicts, I've found that there is another stage that comes first -- early exposure. Let's look at these stages:
EARLY EXPOSURE
Most guys who get addicted to **** start early. They see **** when they are very young and it gets its foot in the door.
**** ADDICTION
You keep coming back to ****. It becomes a regular part of your life. You're hooked and can't quit.
ESCALATION
You start to look for more graphic pornography. You start using **** that disgusted you earlier. Now, it excites you.
DESENSITIZATION
You start to become numb to the images you see. Even the most graphic **** doesn't excite you any more. You become desperate to feel the same thrill again, but you can't find it.
ACTING OUT SEXUALLY
This is the point where men make a crucial jump and start acting out the images they have seen. Some move from the paper and plastic images of **** into the real world, with real people, in destructive ways.
**** Addiction: Am I Addicted?
If you see any of these patterns in your life, you need to put the brakes on right now. Is **** becoming more and more in control of your life? Do you have trouble putting it down? Do you keep going back for more?
**** Addiction: What Can I Do?
The first thing you've got to do is admit that you struggle with pornography. Believe me, you are not strange or unusual if you do. Millions of men are at various stages in the struggle with ****. It's really not surprising. The **** industry has spent billions of dollars trying to snare you. Is it really shocking that they have succeeded? For some of you there may also be issues in your past, such as abuse or sexual exposure, that makes **** addiction even harder to shake. There is only so much you can do in fighting addiction without help.
You need someone to help you break this addiction. Overcoming the secrecy is absolutely vital. You probably can't escape addiction without it. That doesn't mean everyone has to know you're struggling. Pick someone you can trust who counsels men who are having problems with addiction -- a pastor, youth group leader or counselor. Someone you can completely trust, feel safe with and has experience in the area of addiction isn't going to be surprised.
The Most Important Relationship
In your search for intimacy and love, pornography is an empty substitute for real love.
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