TruthTheOnlyDefense
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http://www.heraldsun.com.au/news/op...e/news-story/7fa9e93a5962da9f6818c305e790e303
BILL Bryson once pointed out that Australia has more things that can kill you than anywhere else. Safely reading Down Under from a small Scottish town a mere 16,850km away, I didn’t fully appreciate this fact.
Which brings me to life in Australia. And not just life in Australia — life in the world’s most liveable city.
Somehow I’d managed to convince myself, that venomous creatures did not lurk in this beautiful city which boasts great coffee and culture, art, laneways and amazing food and wine.
But there are lethal redback spiders basking in the garden, snakes in the shed, foxes trotting across the road at level crossings and kangaroos which look like heavyweight boxing champions guarding vineyards.
Welcome to Melbourne.
Most deadly: Redback spider v brown snake
Man has legs amputated after being bitten by spider
Don’t go in the water. Ever. Picture: File image
Trevor Hopkins opened his shed door to find a dead snake trapped in a spider web on his Murrawee farm in north-western Victoria. Picture: Supplied
A redback spider took on a poisonous snake at Neale Postlethwaite property north of Melbourne.
Don’t get me wrong, I love this place. Melbourne is a great city — and it’s home. But nowhere is perfect. And we do need to talk about the number of things that can kill you.
My colleagues chortled at a video of a venomous snake fighting a mammoth spider in a shed in country Victoria while I tried (and failed) not to look aghast and, frankly, more than a little bit freaked out.
I did try to rationalise that this was in the country and surely — surely — things must be different in the city. Apparently not. It turns out that tiger snakes, one of the world’s most lethal snakes, are extremely common in Melbourne city and the suburbs.
Now I know some people will say that tiger snakes will slide off at the vibrations from footsteps. I beg to differ, having seen a very angry tiger snake attacking a minibus.
And what’s worse, working at the Herald Sun means these sightings come with pictures, graphics, video and handy digital interactives outlining how likely you are to die if you’re bitten.
Live spiders, deadly snakes mailed in shoebox
This tiger snake was found in Werribee by snake catcher Adam Sapiano.
This Eastern Brown snake was found in Werribee by snake catcher Adam Sapiano. Yes, it can kill you.
For someone born and raised half a world away and who is completely unaccustomed to dangerous, venomous beasties, it is scary as hell to be living in a place which has more things that can kill you than anywhere else in the whole world. Which seems to be hilarious to Australians who take such pride in the country’s killer wildlife.
Did you know that a single tiger snake can give birth to 30 young during the summer months? Which is now incidentally — we are smack bang in the middle of summer.
Talking about this in the office, another colleague pipes up: “Don’t forget about sea lice.” Shudder.
Sea lice. Yuck. Picture: Supplied
Then there are days when you can’t go outside because it’s so disgustingly hot, and you can’t — or shouldn’t — go cool down in the water because of blue-ringed octopuses, sea lice and sharks.
Full on, white pointer, “we’re going to need a bigger boat,” Jaws-esque sharks are regularly spotted on the Victorian coast.
Then we get to the fact that snakes can swim. Venomous snakes in Victoria include the copperhead, brown and red-bellied black snake. And they can bloody well swim.
The Travel Victoria website tries to be reassuring by stating that snakes are “typically shy creatures”. Not helping. STAY OUT OF THE WATER.
Luckily we don’t have salt water crocodiles here and the hipster population is safely under control. But that isn’t enough to help me deal with necrotising fasciitis (I still have a scar) or the time a bearded dragon made its way into the living room.
Tiger snakes can swim. Picture: Richard Jupe
A blue ringed octopus. Yes it’s pretty, but it can still kill you. Picture: Supplied
This is normally where there’s a cry of “toughen up princess”.
I should say that I’ve almost been kidnapped twice — once in Kosovo, once in Papua New Guinea. There was a bomb in Kosovo, an earthquake in Christchurch and a major bushfire in Margaret River.
My patient and understanding parents are used to the phone calls saying: “You’ve not to worry, but…”
I say this not so you think I’m a hard ***, or even a stupid backpacker with terrible karma, but so you understand that I’m not a complete wimp.
To be fair, I knowingly moved to a country historically populated by convicts to live in a city where gangs run rampant and apparently bikies aren’t relegated to 80s TV shows.
I can deal with that. Snakes and spiders, not so much.
http://www.heraldsun.com.au/news/op...e/news-story/7fa9e93a5962da9f6818c305e790e303
BILL Bryson once pointed out that Australia has more things that can kill you than anywhere else. Safely reading Down Under from a small Scottish town a mere 16,850km away, I didn’t fully appreciate this fact.
Which brings me to life in Australia. And not just life in Australia — life in the world’s most liveable city.
Somehow I’d managed to convince myself, that venomous creatures did not lurk in this beautiful city which boasts great coffee and culture, art, laneways and amazing food and wine.
But there are lethal redback spiders basking in the garden, snakes in the shed, foxes trotting across the road at level crossings and kangaroos which look like heavyweight boxing champions guarding vineyards.
Welcome to Melbourne.
Most deadly: Redback spider v brown snake
Man has legs amputated after being bitten by spider
Don’t go in the water. Ever. Picture: File image
Trevor Hopkins opened his shed door to find a dead snake trapped in a spider web on his Murrawee farm in north-western Victoria. Picture: Supplied
A redback spider took on a poisonous snake at Neale Postlethwaite property north of Melbourne.
Don’t get me wrong, I love this place. Melbourne is a great city — and it’s home. But nowhere is perfect. And we do need to talk about the number of things that can kill you.
My colleagues chortled at a video of a venomous snake fighting a mammoth spider in a shed in country Victoria while I tried (and failed) not to look aghast and, frankly, more than a little bit freaked out.
I did try to rationalise that this was in the country and surely — surely — things must be different in the city. Apparently not. It turns out that tiger snakes, one of the world’s most lethal snakes, are extremely common in Melbourne city and the suburbs.
Now I know some people will say that tiger snakes will slide off at the vibrations from footsteps. I beg to differ, having seen a very angry tiger snake attacking a minibus.
And what’s worse, working at the Herald Sun means these sightings come with pictures, graphics, video and handy digital interactives outlining how likely you are to die if you’re bitten.
Live spiders, deadly snakes mailed in shoebox
This tiger snake was found in Werribee by snake catcher Adam Sapiano.
This Eastern Brown snake was found in Werribee by snake catcher Adam Sapiano. Yes, it can kill you.
For someone born and raised half a world away and who is completely unaccustomed to dangerous, venomous beasties, it is scary as hell to be living in a place which has more things that can kill you than anywhere else in the whole world. Which seems to be hilarious to Australians who take such pride in the country’s killer wildlife.
Did you know that a single tiger snake can give birth to 30 young during the summer months? Which is now incidentally — we are smack bang in the middle of summer.
Talking about this in the office, another colleague pipes up: “Don’t forget about sea lice.” Shudder.
Sea lice. Yuck. Picture: Supplied
Then there are days when you can’t go outside because it’s so disgustingly hot, and you can’t — or shouldn’t — go cool down in the water because of blue-ringed octopuses, sea lice and sharks.
Full on, white pointer, “we’re going to need a bigger boat,” Jaws-esque sharks are regularly spotted on the Victorian coast.
Then we get to the fact that snakes can swim. Venomous snakes in Victoria include the copperhead, brown and red-bellied black snake. And they can bloody well swim.
The Travel Victoria website tries to be reassuring by stating that snakes are “typically shy creatures”. Not helping. STAY OUT OF THE WATER.
Luckily we don’t have salt water crocodiles here and the hipster population is safely under control. But that isn’t enough to help me deal with necrotising fasciitis (I still have a scar) or the time a bearded dragon made its way into the living room.
Tiger snakes can swim. Picture: Richard Jupe
A blue ringed octopus. Yes it’s pretty, but it can still kill you. Picture: Supplied
This is normally where there’s a cry of “toughen up princess”.
I should say that I’ve almost been kidnapped twice — once in Kosovo, once in Papua New Guinea. There was a bomb in Kosovo, an earthquake in Christchurch and a major bushfire in Margaret River.
My patient and understanding parents are used to the phone calls saying: “You’ve not to worry, but…”
I say this not so you think I’m a hard ***, or even a stupid backpacker with terrible karma, but so you understand that I’m not a complete wimp.
To be fair, I knowingly moved to a country historically populated by convicts to live in a city where gangs run rampant and apparently bikies aren’t relegated to 80s TV shows.
I can deal with that. Snakes and spiders, not so much.
http://www.heraldsun.com.au/news/op...e/news-story/7fa9e93a5962da9f6818c305e790e303
.
, i might cancel my flight.
