The disease of ogling at every passing woman

[On the Edge]

I recently visited Pakistan after a decade. I was overwhelmed by the unmatchable hospitality I received by my extended family. I visited beautiful monuments, masjid, museums, colourful bazaars and wonderful parks in the capital Islamabad and it's hustling bustling neighbouring city of Rawalpindi. During my time in Pakistan I couldn't help but notice a very uncomfortable and almost intimidating experience of men randomly staring/gazing at women anywhere and everywhere given the opportunity. Places such as the famous monument in Islamabad during a hot humid mid afternoon. Groups of men would huddle and ogle at any female that passed by even if she was with her family. This occurred to my very own female relatives who were dressed modestly and in full Islamic attire. As I witnessed this I decided to confront one of the perpetrators as i felt it to be a form of harassment. The young man hurried away with his companions to avoid any confrontation or escalation in tension. No matter where I went I witnessed the same disease of men holting in their daily lives to look..... and I mean to look/stare/ogle at any female passing by. There seems to be some serious sexual frustration in Pakistan where some men are unable to control thier gaze. Clearly needs addressing!

.

these are mostly Pathans and Abbasis, otherwise most ppl from Lahore Isloo Karachi wont stare much, one look look could be acceptable but staring right till the end is pathetic
lahore in this regrad is very thand type of city, their ppl are quiet cool in this regard

but isloo is swarmed by pathans and abbasis, they are deprived ppl especially pathans, they have fun but they never accept their women going out without Ninja Burqa, hence they havent seen many girls in their lives,

 

[ziaulislam]

The issue is teenagers having free time with nothing better to do. If there were proper sports centers, entertainment facilities and technical centers with part-time jobs then I think we could overcome this culture of 'puundi'. Also there needs to be some control from the parents over their children, right now parents are too busy with their jobs that they often neglect what their young ones are doing. I don't ask for 100% monitoring but its the responsibility of parents to make their children do something worthwhile like sports, fitness, learning some technical skill in free time.

No the issue is culture and lack of courtesy
Parents teach children how to swear & abusive language rather than general common behavior traits

 

[Dubious]

these are mostly Pathans and Abbasis, otherwise most ppl from Lahore Isloo Karachi wont stare much, one look look could be acceptable but staring right till the end is pathetic
lahore in this regrad is very thand type of city, their ppl are quiet cool in this regard

but isloo is swarmed by pathans and abbasis, they are deprived ppl especially pathans, they have fun but they never accept their women going out without Ninja Burqa, hence they havent seen many girls in their lives,

I wouldnt reduce it to 2 only...In Punjab and even ISB, it is common- getting less but still very common!

 

[Crusher]

It is all the influence of "perverted bollywood" culture propagated by indian movies that have been widely popular in Pakistan for many many decades, in our indigenous local cultures we never had any concept of "staring" or "teasing" of women in our local village cultures, for example in our villages women and men used to work together on the fields before this perverted sh1tty bollywood culture of india chime in our society. Just look at the movies of the bollywood over the decades, they are all about staring, teasing or other perverted social acts around girls/women characters.

 

[Ahmet Pasha]

Problem ranges from Constant bombardment of dancing nangi Indian women in movies, to increasingly controversial tv serials, to readily available p**n videos, to lack of jobs, to difficulty in islamic nikkah/doing things the halal way due to fact that the demands of suitors (rishta aunties too) of both genders have reached the sky etc etc. These and more problems are leading to the sexual frustration in men AND women in Pakistani society.

I assure you that there are desperate women too in Pakistan doing some real messed up shit out of their frustration bcz they are rejected by society either they are past their prime, are "talaqyafta", have been widowed or labeled as "used goods".

But OP is too damn right about desperate, diseased Pakistani men. I could be one of them but I feel I have a strong desire to do things the halal way and not to lose the battle to shaytan. So I pray that may Allah help me and all men and women like me. Ameen.

This really is a disease as OP said and desi parents of today should wake up and start turning towards the halal path that Allah has made for us.

 

[Crusher]

Indian Bollywood was exporting this sh1t to Pakistan even in 90s, I remember these two songs that were so creepy and promoting ogling, teasing, staring of girls and women. This is just the tip of the iceberg, there are other countless scenes, songs from Bollywood movies that always promoted this sick perverted mindset.

This is from 1993 when I was in high school and saw my self how the boys used to tease girls by playing this song on streets, in public transport etc.

This is from 1997, again promoting the same BS,

And those who have "sex deprivation with opposite sex" always had the option of "hand practice", so that is a rubbish excuse anyway.

 

[Meengla]

the same Pakistani girl can sit in main quad of American university with hundreds of young men passing by. Less people will be ogling at her because most of the ones would have spent the previous night ****ing the brains of some coed. you can ignore real world evidence at your own peril.

Nailed it.
It is ultimately the sexual frustration. Of course there are other causes--low upbringing/lack of manners for which there should be some media campaign: Please don't ogle!!

But ANY man who is regularly 'getting it' doesn't pay as much attention to ladies as he would otherwise. There are physiological reasons for that.

PS. On a very personal note, just to underscore the point--my American wife makes sure I am happy before I go away on longer trips...

 

[SQ8]

It's across borders, the only difference is that in more lawful societies the #metoo movements and prior to them sexual harassment lawsuits have brought these practices to heel.

The result is a pretty healthy environment not just in the street but also in work and sports.

People still “check each other out” but it's much more subtle, polite and “inoffensive”.

 

[waz]

I'm all for it!!!

With three mother in laws?

A few of my mates are married to two women, jealousy, time management, stress all comes with it. Yes there are perks i.e. the intimate stuff but serious the negatives are quite a few.

I recently visited Pakistan after a decade. I was overwhelmed by the unmatchable hospitality I received by my extended family. I visited beautiful monuments, masjid, museums, colourful bazaars and wonderful parks in the capital Islamabad and it's hustling bustling neighbouring city of Rawalpindi. During my time in Pakistan I couldn't help but notice a very uncomfortable and almost intimidating experience of men randomly staring/gazing at women anywhere and everywhere given the opportunity. Places such as the famous monument in Islamabad during a hot humid mid afternoon. Groups of men would huddle and ogle at any female that passed by even if she was with her family. This occurred to my very own female relatives who were dressed modestly and in full Islamic attire. As I witnessed this I decided to confront one of the perpetrators as i felt it to be a form of harassment. The young man hurried away with his companions to avoid any confrontation or escalation in tension. No matter where I went I witnessed the same disease of men holting in their daily lives to look..... and I mean to look/stare/ogle at any female passing by. There seems to be some serious sexual frustration in Pakistan where some men are unable to control thier gaze. Clearly needs addressing!

.

Happens a lot, hopefully if society talks more about it, it should be reduced or become more subtle.

People raise harami, that's why.

I live in the UK and don't doubt for a second that men will check out beautiful women, but people are discrete, nobody stares, oggles or hoots. Only total harami will and its relatively rare.

Bro cat calling in London and other major cities is rife. It's common as muck.

 

[Asian.Century]

Pathetic from Pakistani men and boys. some action should be brought up.

 

[fisher1]

So, even women in Hijab get stared , as you just said. All these men, whether they ogle at a women in Burka or without are total scums, you cant say guys who stare at a woman in Burka is total scum and guy who stare at woman in regular clothes in half scum, lol, Burka itself is not the solution. Unless someone wants to wear Burka/Hijab , thats their choice, but it shouldnt be enforced as means to hide from these scums.


Thats not the standard we should be proud of. Just look at the video, the type of people who are harassing the woman is the type who hang out on streets, retired/jobless , latinos, blacks, immigrants (a major chunk of NYC population). Just because this happens in NYC doesnt mean we should be happy it happens in Pak. Does such a thing happen to woman in Netherlands, Singapore, Japan , etc?

I don't care about enforcing. What i stated was my experiences which is that Burka/Hijab reduces staring to rarity. Seen it in university, streets etc. And yes only scum would stare at Burka/Hijab because there's nothing to stare at.

Our biology is made to stare. You don't want that attention, don't draw it to yourself. Islam has told you the solution, follow it or not up to ya.

You can't dress with attention seeking attire then chastise men for being men. That's hypocrisy.

It's wrong but what are you going to do? Fine people for staring?

 

[Khafee]

No the issue is culture and lack of courtesy
Parents teach children how to swear & abusive language rather than general common behavior traits

Say what............!

 

[Indus Pakistan]

More to the point is bad manners. It's all about manners. I look as much now as I did in my 20s but suddenly a self serving control kicks in because I do not want to be creep as I am aware that is how I will come across and make others uncomfortable. Meaning you need to learn to get a grip on nature.

@nahtanbob

 

[Pakhtoon yum]

People need to be taught that staring is wrong.

They need to me taught alot more then that. I blame the 12 year war for this culture chaos and the mess the society is in.

 

[Kabira]

There is a reason Centaurus Mall banned single males. And if you go to any park in Islamabad, majority of public is consisted of males and they will stare at females like they have never seen one before.

I used to say that policy of Centaurus mall was discriminatory but once you actually go to Islamabad and experience public places with female relatives then you will be thankful for Centaurus mall banning single males. At least there is one place in Islamabad where you don't have to worry about that stuff.