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Stupid and Funny from all over the world

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hey huda, yeh tumhare saath kon football khel raha hai?:rofl:
 
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Santa-Oye!what R U doing?

Banta-Recording this babys voice.

Santa-Why?

Banta- When he grows up, I shall ask him what he meant by this

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Gang of SARDARS broke a Bank.
Instead of cash they found Botles full of Chilled Red Wine,
Happily they drank & went away.
Next day Headline aai: Blood Bank lutya gya.

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Ek Sardar ne ek bachy se pucha k tum ko A,B,C Aaty hai to bachy ne keha k mujy 9 tak aty hia..
Sardar ne bachy se keha k oyee Ullu k pathy 9 A,b,c main nahe aata. yeh to Alif,, Be,,Main ata hai:


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Sardar Ne Jalte Hue Makan Se 6 Logo Ko Apni Jaan Pe Khelkar Bahar Nikala

Fir Bhi Usko Jail Ho Gayi

Kyun...

Kyun..Ki Vo Sab Firebrigade Wale The

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Santa ki ladai apne baap se ho gayi

To usne apne baap ki photo kabristan me 1 ped pe latka diya

Aur Niche Likha

"COMING SOON”

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SARDAR:- Yar iska matlab kya hota hai, "I AM GOING"?

FRIEND:- Main jaa raha hun.

SARDAR:- Saaley, aise kaise jayega, 20 aur bhi aise ja chuke hain....answer bata ke jaa..


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Santa went to temple & saw people puting coin in box & praying

Santa: Wow! How amazing. People are talking to God through coin phone without receiver


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Waiter gives bill to Sardar

Sardar: "Take my card."

Waiter: "But sir, this is Ration Card."

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SardarJi: Ghar mai Mera he Hukam chalta hai.
Mai Kehta hon, Garam paani le aao, woh le aati hai,

Dost: Garam pani Q?

Sardar: Garam pani se Bartan Achay Dhultay hain.

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A teacher asked her class for sentences using the word "beans"..
"My father grows beans," said one student.
"My father cooks beans," said another.

Then a Little Sardarji spoke up: "We are all human beans."

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Sardar k 12 bachon mein 1 alag dikhta tha:

Jab uski biwi marnay wali thi to Sardar ne poocha: Ab to bata do ye kis ka hai?

Sardarni: Sartaj, sirf yehi aapka hai.

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Sardar: Mery dada ny 1857 ke jang main dushman ki tangain kaat di thin.

Dost: Gardanien q nai katin?


Sardar: Wo pehly he kati hui thin...

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Sardar: Muje E-Mail bnana hy. Sardar, Sardarg, Sardar123, Sardarabc Koi bhi nhe mil rha.

Major Rohail: Tum "Akalmand_Sardar" try kro 100% mil jye ga.

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Computer Lesson:

Major Rohail: Plz turn ON your computer

Sardar: OK kar liya.

Major Rohail: Now Plz click on MY Computer.

Sardar: OK! Kaha hai "AAP" ka computer?

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Sardar to wife: rat ko mene 1 horror movie dekhi, 1 chudeil kabhi mere age kabhi piche aur kabhi sath chal rahi thi,
Wife: Kaun si movie thi?
Sardar: Apni shadi ki

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Sardar ki wife inspecter se!
Mera husband ek hafte pehle aaloo lene gaya tha abhi tak wapis nahi aaye

Inspector bhi sardar tha bola:- to behan kuch or paka lo:

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Judge: why did u shoot ur wife, instead of shooting her lover?
Sardar: Your honour, it's easier to shoot a woman once, than shooting one
man every week.

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ek sardar apne bete se: beta agar tum exams main fail ho gaye to mujhe papa mat kehna.

beta: OK...

after one month...

baap: beta result ka kya hua??

beta: deemag kharab mat kar "BABU LAL"..

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road par accident se bheed ho gai......

santa sardar ko koi aage aakar dekhne nahi de raha tha...

sardar chillaya: mera bapu.....

sab ne sardar ko aage kar diya.....

aur wahan par ek kutte ka accident hua tha.....

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. .
Santa's slam book:
Strength: My wife, Jeeto.
2. Weakness: Banta's wife, amreeto.
3. Opportunity : When Banta is on tour.
4. Threat: When I am on tour
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santa's Son - Papa jaldi-2 mera viya kra deo nahi ta main DAADI nal viya kra lavanga.
santa: Oye tu meri MAA nal viya krayenga.!
Son:- Kyon tussi meri MAA nal ni krayea..
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santa was travling in train,
A woman sat on his son's berth & didn't getup...
santa shouted:"THIS LADY IS NOT GIVING BIRTH TO MY CHILD…!"
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Santa: meri biwi mujhe chorr ke chali gayi.
Banta: tu uska khyal nahi rakhta hoga.
Santa arre yaar....sagi behan ki tarah rakhta tha usko!
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2 Sardars were watching a beautiful girl.
1st santa – Kya maal hai yaar..!
2nd santa – Arey haan. Maal se yaad aya “Bhabi ji kaisi hai. . ..?
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Santa Singh sends sms to all his friends...
"My cell no. has changed.. Earlier it was Nokia 1100. Now, it is Nokia 6600."
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NASA ne 3 santa chaand pe bheje. Rocket uda, magar aadhe raste se vapas aa gaye!
Jab sardaro ko pucha gaya , toh unhone kaha: 'AAJ AMAWAS HAI, CHAAND TO HOGA HI NAHI NA'!!

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Santa – Yaar maine apni girl friend ko gift dena hai, kya dun ?
Banta – Gold ring de de
Santa – Koi badi cheez bata
Banta – M.R.F ka tyre de de. .
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Santa: Oye tera Biah ho gaya?
Banta: Haan.
Santa: Kuri naal?
Banta: Oye munde naal BHI hunda hai kya?
Santa: Haan, meri behen da hoya si....!
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santa – Beta ye kaisi machis lay kar aaye ho ek bhi nahi jal rahi
SON – Kya baat kartay ho pappa sub check kar ke laya hoooon
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Gurdware waleyan ne e elan kita hai k gurdware Vich 5,10,20,50,100,500,de note nahi chadae jaange. . .
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KyonKi
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GANDHI de sir te rumal nahi hai.
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santa : Darling, years ago u had a figure like Coke bottle.
Jeeto: Yes darling I still do. Only differnece is earlier it was 300ml now it's 1.5 ltr.
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Teacher: Make a sentence in which 1 word repeated 4 times
santa : Lara Dutta marries Brian Lara and she becomes Lara Lara.
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Santa went to Mysore palace.
Tourist guide – Santa ji, plz dont sit there, its Tipu Sultan's chair
Santa - Oye dont worry yaar. I'll get up when he comes.!!

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Teacher: A for?
santa : Apple
Teacher: Jor se bolo?
santa : Jai mata di.
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santa orders pizza.
Waiter: Sir, shud i cut it into 4 pieces or into 8 pieces?
santa : 4 hi karde yaar, 8 khaye nahi jayenge.
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Banta: Truck dekhkar tum kaampte kyon ho?
Santa: Ek truck driver meri biwi lekar bhaag gaya tha, har baar lagta hai jaise usko vapas karne aya hai.
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santa sitting on the top of the mountain and studying.
When a person asked what he was doing?
He replied, Oye! higher studies yaar.
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2 sardars were fighting after exam.
Sir: Y r u fighting?
1st santa : This fool left the answer sheet blank,
Sir: So what?
1st santa : Even I did the same thing.. Now, the examiner will think that we both copied.
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santa learning english introduces his family in the party:

Hi! I am santa ,
This is my Sardarni,
He is my Kid &
She is my kidney.
 
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