Stupid and funny from all over the world - II
- Thread starter Elmo
- Start date
- Status
KRAIT
ELITE MEMBER
- Joined
- Jan 14, 2012
- Messages
- 16,971
- Reaction score
- -27
- Country
- Location
Paarkhi nazar.
Thats why I study physics. Its a physical phenomena to describe logically the RESONANCE of .
NP-complete
BANNED
- Joined
- Dec 10, 2010
- Messages
- 502
- Reaction score
- 1
- Country
- Location
Satire apparently....
Rape Only Hurts If You Fight It by John Petroski
Most people today would claim that rape is a terrible crime almost akin to murder, but I strongly disagree. Far from a vile act, rape is a magical experience that benifits society as a whole. I realize many of you will disagree with this thesis, but lend me your ears and Im sure Ill sway you towards a darkened alley.
If it werent for rape, Western Civilization might not exist as we know it today. When the Romans were faced with a disproportionate ratio of women to men in the early kingdom, they had to do something, lest their flidgling society die for lack of sons. To solve their little dilemma, they did what any reasonable man would do: they threw a festival for their Sabine neighbors, and then stole and raped their women. Its quite logical; in fact I dont understand why the settlers at Plymoth didnt do the same to the local Indiansit certainly would have saved on shipping costs.
Obviously, in the case of the Rape of the Sabines, rape was a tremendous help to society. The Sabine women, for their part, didnt seem to mind so much, as they threw themselves between their brutish old Sabine husbands and their charming new Roman ones to prevent bloodshed when the Sabine men came to reclaim their wives. Yet even when society was totally against a rape, the raunchy act has benifited society too. Where would the Romans be, after all, if it werent for the Rape of the Lucretia infuriating the people to the point of overthrowing their last king, Lucius Tarpuinius Superbus? If it werent for that event, the world might have never had the Roman Republic for a pristine example of a flawless government.
Rapes glorious advantages are not, however, exclusively found from 2,000 year old examples. In actuality rape advantages can very much be seen today. Take ugly women for example. If it werent for rape, how would they ever know the joys of intercourse with a man who isnt drunk? In a society as plastic-conscious as our own, are we really to believe that some man would ever sleep with a girl resembling a wildebeest if he didnt have a few schnapps in him? Of course he wouldntat least no self-respecting man wouldbut there in lies the beauty of rape. No self respecting man would rape in the first place, so ugly women are guaranteed a romp with not only a sober man, but a bad boy too; and we all know how much ladies like the bad boy.
Ugly women are not, however, the only people who benefit from rapeprisoners enjoy as many perks too. What, after all, could be possibly be more boring than spending years of your life confined to some tiny cell 23 hours a day? The answer, of course, is spending years of your life confined to some tiny cell 23 hours a day and never getting some hot action. With rape, prisoners never have to worry about that. Instead, they merely need worry about treating their rapist with enough love and respect to earn a quick reach-around.
But if there is one bread and butter reason for why rape should not only be accepted, but even endorsed, it is because our news editors are in dire need of interesting stories for our front page. Bookstore stories? Fossils? One dollar coins? Please. Now, some saucy circle-jerk rape action? Yeah, thats the ticket.
Rape Only Hurts If You Fight It by John Petroski
Most people today would claim that rape is a terrible crime almost akin to murder, but I strongly disagree. Far from a vile act, rape is a magical experience that benifits society as a whole. I realize many of you will disagree with this thesis, but lend me your ears and Im sure Ill sway you towards a darkened alley.
If it werent for rape, Western Civilization might not exist as we know it today. When the Romans were faced with a disproportionate ratio of women to men in the early kingdom, they had to do something, lest their flidgling society die for lack of sons. To solve their little dilemma, they did what any reasonable man would do: they threw a festival for their Sabine neighbors, and then stole and raped their women. Its quite logical; in fact I dont understand why the settlers at Plymoth didnt do the same to the local Indiansit certainly would have saved on shipping costs.
Obviously, in the case of the Rape of the Sabines, rape was a tremendous help to society. The Sabine women, for their part, didnt seem to mind so much, as they threw themselves between their brutish old Sabine husbands and their charming new Roman ones to prevent bloodshed when the Sabine men came to reclaim their wives. Yet even when society was totally against a rape, the raunchy act has benifited society too. Where would the Romans be, after all, if it werent for the Rape of the Lucretia infuriating the people to the point of overthrowing their last king, Lucius Tarpuinius Superbus? If it werent for that event, the world might have never had the Roman Republic for a pristine example of a flawless government.
Rapes glorious advantages are not, however, exclusively found from 2,000 year old examples. In actuality rape advantages can very much be seen today. Take ugly women for example. If it werent for rape, how would they ever know the joys of intercourse with a man who isnt drunk? In a society as plastic-conscious as our own, are we really to believe that some man would ever sleep with a girl resembling a wildebeest if he didnt have a few schnapps in him? Of course he wouldntat least no self-respecting man wouldbut there in lies the beauty of rape. No self respecting man would rape in the first place, so ugly women are guaranteed a romp with not only a sober man, but a bad boy too; and we all know how much ladies like the bad boy.
Ugly women are not, however, the only people who benefit from rapeprisoners enjoy as many perks too. What, after all, could be possibly be more boring than spending years of your life confined to some tiny cell 23 hours a day? The answer, of course, is spending years of your life confined to some tiny cell 23 hours a day and never getting some hot action. With rape, prisoners never have to worry about that. Instead, they merely need worry about treating their rapist with enough love and respect to earn a quick reach-around.
But if there is one bread and butter reason for why rape should not only be accepted, but even endorsed, it is because our news editors are in dire need of interesting stories for our front page. Bookstore stories? Fossils? One dollar coins? Please. Now, some saucy circle-jerk rape action? Yeah, thats the ticket.
Amolthebest
FULL MEMBER
- Joined
- Jan 10, 2012
- Messages
- 1,648
- Reaction score
- 0
Amolthebest
FULL MEMBER
- Joined
- Jan 10, 2012
- Messages
- 1,648
- Reaction score
- 0
Amolthebest
FULL MEMBER
- Joined
- Jan 10, 2012
- Messages
- 1,648
- Reaction score
- 0
hunter_hunted
SENIOR MEMBER
- Joined
- Dec 2, 2010
- Messages
- 4,082
- Reaction score
- -2
- Country
- Location
agar aisi teacher ho to attendance 100% ho ge kia khayal hai
Maen Kamzori mehsoos kar raha hun
laiqs@mi
FULL MEMBER
- Joined
- Sep 10, 2009
- Messages
- 1,571
- Reaction score
- 0
Marshmallow
SENIOR MEMBER
- Joined
- Nov 24, 2012
- Messages
- 4,469
- Reaction score
- 5
- Country
- Location
- Status
Similar threads
