One liners :)

[Hang em High]

If God is watching us, the least we can do is be entertaining.

 

[prithwidw]

/\/\/\ and humane.

 

[Hang em High]

And I love this one about jobs: I thought I wanted a career, turns out I just wanted paychecks.

 

[Hang em High]

Laugh on!!!
A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing.

 

[Spring Onion]

Men's rules

"If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like nothing's wrong."

 

[saurabh]

"A group of psychologists say they have discovered twenty-three different body language indicators that show whether or not a person is lying. If you would like to see all twenty-three at the same time, they recommend taking a guided tour of the White House." -Conan O'Brien

 

[Spring Onion]

"A group of psychologists say they have discovered twenty-three different body language indicators that show whether or not a person is lying. If you would like to see all twenty-three at the same time, they recommend taking a guided tour of the White House." -Conan O'Brien

hahahahah that was very good one

 

[saurabh]

I'm very responsible, when ever something goes wrong they always say I'm responsible.

 

[saurabh]

Did you know that dolphins are so intelligent that within only a few weeks of captivity, they can train Americans to stand at the very edge of the pool and throw them fish.

 

[prithwidw]

The harder the life; the sweeter the song.

 

[jin]

If we have the right to use our reason, we certainly have the right to act in accordance with it, and no god can have the right to punish us for such action”

 

[jin]

A good character is the best tombstone. Those who loved you and were helped by you will remember you when forget-me-nots have withered. Carve your name on hearts, not on more posts.

 

[jin]

It's nice to be important, but it's more important to be nice.

 

[jin]

What this world needs is a new kind of army - the army of the kind.

 

[jin]

There is no greater loan than a sympathetic ear.