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Meet the Bin Laughin of comedy!

RabzonKhan

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Meet the Bin Laughin of comedy!

October 14, 2008
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Azhar Usman, a US-Chicago-born Muslim comedian, worked as a lawyer for not too long. But he decided his calling was standup comedy and he had followed the acts of several good standup comics when he was studying law.

Apart from his standup comedy, which is now in its seventh year, and which takes him to not only a number of cities in America and Canada [Images] but also to Egypt [Images], Australia [Images] and the United Kingdom, he also works for a community organisation in Chicago.

But standup comedy is his mainstay. Some people have called him the Bin Laughin of comedy, thanks to the luxuriant beard he sports. He says his sole goal, through comedy, is to promote better understanding of Islam and Muslims.

Born of immigrant parents from Bihar, he has also performed with a number of desi comedians. He holds a Bachelor of Arts degree in communication from the University of Illinois at Chicago and a Juris Doctorate from the University of Minnesota Law School.

His concert film, Allah Made Me Funny, is showing in many American cities. It has good amount of praise though some critics have felt the comedy -- which features his two partners -- is a little tame.

This is how he describes his act to Arthur J Pais:

Also Read: Allah Made Me Funny: Next cult hit?

You have watched a lot of Bollywood films and you say you watched the comedians Johnny Walker and Johnny Lever. There was also a comedian called Johnny Whisky. What could be next, Johnny Kebab?


Johnny McCain, I guess. On second thought, I hope not.


Your comedy group is called Allah Made Me Funny and now you have the film Allah Made Me Funny in Concert. Why did you choose this name?


Allah is the sweetest name for any Muslim but it is vilified in America and much of the Western world because of the work of a few crazy fanatics and the sensational media. We want to reclaim the word Allah. We want to celebrate something that is beautiful. Some are surprised at the title; they could not connect God with humour.


You have called your comedy halal comedy. Unlike most stand-up comedy, your comedy is not raunchy or degrading to ethnic groups or to women.


I just cannot do that kind of comedy. At Allah Made Me Funny concerts and in the film, there is no vulgarity or humour that hurts. I have been greatly inspired by the comedy of Jerry Seinfeld [Images], which is clean comedy. There is nothing mean about it. And there is certainly no vulgarity.

But you also admire the comedy of Richard Pryor. Now, Pryor was well known for his broad humour and his jokes were filled with sex and had raw language.


Seinfeld has said standup comedy is a journey into the self. A comedian cannot connect himself with the audiences unless the jokes have an authenticity and honesty. They should come from somewhere within your own self.
Pryor came from a very different background than my own. He lived as a boy in a whore house. He lived a very rough life. His comedy reflects his upbringing. I did not have anything like that happen in my life.


There are quite a few Muslim comedians now who deal with Islam in their comedy, in America and in the United Kingdom. How do you describe this phenomenon?


I call it the Kebab Circuit. Like the Jews in New York area had their comedy acts, first in the Catskills in New York state. That came to be known as Borscht Belt. The African Americans who were not accepted in the mainstream had their own comedy clubs and, later, they came to be accepted in the mainstream. Ditto for the Jewish comics.


And as for us, we get quite a few non-Muslims if the promoter does a good job and advertises our performances in the mainstream publications and radio. In Australia and the United Kingdom where we have performed, we have had many, many white people attending our shows. You travel a lot performing and often you fly to cities far away from Chicago. (Chuckles) The other passengers are always very nice to me after the plane has landed.


What is it like performing abroad?


I just got back from telling jokes overseas, and it's a totally different vibe over there than it is over here. In America, where I'm from, I get dirty looks for being a Muslim. So sometimes it's kind of nice to be hated just for being an American.


When I joke about this, it works because it is a flip on the idea that 'Muslims are the most hated people on earth,' since, actually, many people on earth are fed up with American elitism as well. And it's funny because it basically makes me universally hated, which is sort of the pinnacle of self-deprecation, I suppose.


What is your Obama joke?


The media always picks on Obama by exaggerating news stories. Remember several months ago: 'Barack Obama [Images], when he was a child in Indonesia, attended a madrasa.' Ooooooh. Turns out 'madrasa' is just the Arabic word for 'school.' The media was upset because Barack Obama went to school? Proving once again that many Americans prefer their politicians uneducated.


Do you have a joke that pertains particularly to the South Asian Muslim community?


Never make the mistake I once made: asking a Pakistani if he is from India. Oops. I am a survivor. I was like, 'You are from India, right?' He screamed: 'NO!!!! PA-KIS-TAN.' And then a group of Pakistanis jumped out of the bushes and yelled 'ZINDABAD.' I was like, 'Why are you guys hiding in the bushes?'


What was the reaction of your parents and your wife when you decided to go into full-time comedy shows and community activities?


My family has been overwhelmingly supportive. They've been thrilled by all of the success that we've already had, and they are always hoping and praying for our continued success.


What does your wife do?


My wife is much smarter than me! She is a graduate of the University of Chicago Law School, where she was actually a student of Barack Obama several years ago. She worked as a litigator briefly after law school, but decided to be a stay-at-home mom after we had our first son in 2002. She quit her legal practice then and has been raising our three children as more than a full-time job since that time.


Did you start your comedy tours with two partners?


Preacher Moss is the founder of the 'Allah Made Me Funny--Official Muslim Comedy Tour.' He had been working on getting the project off the ground for nearly a year before he heard about me and my comedy. He then reached out in early 2004 and we hit it off immediately. I agreed to join him as the co-founder of the tour.


How did Amer join you?


When we began to travel extensively, we thought it would be a good idea to have a third man with us. We brought Mohammed Amer on the team [in 2006] and we've been touring strong ever since. We heard about Mo around the community and knew that he had been a local rising star on the Houston comedy scene.


Would you tell us about the collaboration work you have done with comedians who are not Muslims?


I am involved with two multi-faith shows. One is with Rabbi Bob Alper, which we call the 'Laugh in Peace Tour, featuring Comedy's Odd Couple,' which is obviously a Jewish-Muslim comedy show. That one is a lot of fun, and it gives me a chance to perform with him on many college campuses, as well as at synagogues, and other interfaith venues.


I am also one of the creators of 'MAKE CHAI NOT WAR: Hilarity through Solidarity,' an all-South Asian standup comedy show that I host.


What was the thinking behind MAKE CHAI NOT WAR?


My principal collaborators are now fellow Indian comedians Rajiv Satyal [who is Hindu] and Paul Varghese [who is Christian]. It's really a very funny, very strong show as all of us are basically co-headliners. We have great hopes for that show as well, and we believe the potential to bring diverse desi audiences together with MCNW is fantastic. We would really love to bring that show to the Indian subcontinent as well.


What was the shrillest protest or criticism you faced five years ago from, as you say, a very small number of people who did not understand what you were doing?


Basically, a few people over the years have felt that my material has the negative effect of perpetuating negative stereotypes about Muslims because they felt that making fun of stereotypes is too often mistaken by audiences as validation and substantiation of stereotypes.


While it may be true that some audience members may misunderstand the intent or purpose behind my comedy material, I think it is absurd to suggest that this would be the predominant result. So I just take their critiques under advisement and I keep working on my act. At the end of the day, standup comedy is art -- and like all art, it is reasonably susceptible to numerous, valid interpretations.


Surely some of the people who opposed your work a few years ago could have changed their mind?


Many have. Now we get invited to perform at events that are raising money for a new mosque or expanding the existing one or some fund-raisers related to charities.


What are you planning for the next year?


A LOT more live touring (we hope!), the DVD release of the concert film, and further development of other media projects I have been working on (including a possible television show, a humour book project, and another film that I am involved with as a producer).


Share with our readers the excitement you feel about going to India for the first time and performing there for the first time, too


I am absolutely thrilled by this possibility. I have not been back to India since 1996, over 12 years ago. I know a lot has changed since then, both in my own life as well as with India. I am excited by the prospect of opening up a whole new market for our comedy -- one of the largest, and most important markets in the world.


Would you be meeting Bollywood producers?


Given the rising global importance and impact of Bollywood film and pop culture, I would love the chance to network with executives and producers from the industry as well. And finally, to be able to bring back some desi-American spirit for my brothers and sisters in the motherland would be an honour and a privilege.
 
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thanks rabzon - ive seen this guy on tv - he is hilarious!!!
 
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POSTCARD USA: Comedy, Muslim style

Khalid Hasan
January 04, 2009

With the exception of cigarettes, which bring no benefit of any kind to anyone, there is nothing under the sun that does not produce some good.

Take 9/11.

Of course it put everyone living in the West with a Muslim name and what are euphemistically called “Middle Eastern looks” under suspicion as possibly being a distant cousin of the uncle of the man who had a brother-in-law, whose wife’s sister’s husband’s maternal uncle once shook hands with Osama bin Laden’s driver when OBL was living in Peshawar under the CIA’s benign care back in the Mujahideen’s heroic jihad against the infidel Russkies.

That was the bad news.

So here is the good news.

In brisk business and in a good deal of demand is an outcropping of Muslim comedians in the United States, Canada and England. Some time ago, three of them went on an Axis of Evil tour of Europe and were a sell-out.

Even the staid Public Broadcasting Service (PBS) has run a documentary featuring Muslim comedians and some of their acts. Not all the faithful think what these people are doing is funny. Some of them consider these fellows — and there are a couple of very funny girls too — traitors to the faith, never missing a chance to rile against them, accusing them of denigrating Islam and making fun of their own people. One bearded gentleman, who spotted one of these comedians boarding a flight, shouted after him, “You are going to hell. That is where you’re going.” The man ended up in London, which, despite its wet summers and double-decker buses, is not quite the site of that great bonfire in the sky.

The American Muslim stand-up comedians — which means guys and gals who stand out there and make jokes, just as our own Omar Sharif does — who have become famous — or infamous as some of the brothers would have it — are: Ahmed Ahmed, Azhar Usman, Dean Obeidallah, Maysoon Zayid, and Tissa Hami. The PBS documentary pointed out that “many of these comedians do jokes about misconceptions of Islam and Middle Eastern and South Asian groups, using their humour as activism for their races and faith.”

Racial profiling and the going over given to Muslims at American airports is the staple of most of their jokes. Maysoon and Tissa, the two women, joke about their experiences as Muslim women. One of them wears a headscarf while she performs, which also serves as a prop for some of her jokes.

Azhar Usman, who is of South Asian origin, takes the stage and greets his audience with a resounding Assalam Alekum, then asks if they know what that means. “It means,” he goes on, “that I am gonna kill you.” His show, billed Allah Made Me Funny, has toured major US and Canadian cities, as well as Europe. There have been invitations from several Arab countries.

One popular stand-up woman comedian is Shazia Mirza, whose family is from Pakistan, though she grew up in England. She jokes about 9/11, sex-hungry Muslim men and the fact that she remains a certified virgin. Some of Shazia’s jokes run like this: “The women in my family all use the same passport.” “I said, Oh, come on, Germany, join the war, it’s not the same without you.” “My name is Shazia Mirza — at least that’s what it says on my pilot’s licence.”

She has received many death threats from “pious God-fearing Muslims”. One of her routines, “The Last Temptation of Shazia”, has her performing in front of a board plastered with printouts of the hate mail she receives some of which she pulls down and reads from. She says in her travels through Europe, she has been mistaken for everything ranging from suicide bomber to a character in a Harry Potter book.

In an interview with Priya Jain for Solan.com, Shazia said, “I stand up onstage for an hour and a half and make people laugh and tell them mostly the truth — most of the stuff is true, it happened to me — and then I go home and pray. I don’t smoke, I don’t drink, I don’t take drugs, I don’t eat pork, and I’m a good Muslim. I don’t understand why people say I can’t be a comedian. I don’t relate the two at all.”

In one of her shows in Texas, Shazia said, “If nuns are all married to God, then God must be a polygamist.” It did not go down very well with the very Christian crowd.

The three Axis of Evil comedians — Dean Obeidallah, a Palestinian-Italian American, Ahmed Ahmed, a Muslim Egyptian American actor who couldn’t land “terrorist” roles because of his excellent English, Aron Kader, a Palestinian-Mormon American actor and Maz Jobrani, an Iranian-American who bunked a PhD programme — spoke to Wajahat Ali of Altmuslim.com.

Obaidullah told Ali, “I’m surprised Fox News doesn’t give hurricanes Muslim names at this point just to screw with us even more. Why not? Just pretend. Just blame us for a tornado, ‘Today they say it’s due to hot and cold air, but I think it’s due to Al Qaeda’.”

On a serious note, he said, “I hope it encourages and inspires more Middle Easterners, Arabs, and Muslims to get involved in the entertainment field, and all forms of the media. So often we sit and complain how we are demonised and portrayed horribly, the only ones who will ever clear our name is us. The burden is on us. No one is going to do us a favour.”

Khalid Hasan is Daily Times’ US-based correspondent. His e-mail is khasan2@cox.net
 
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Lord of flog

by Nadeem F. Paracha
04 23rd, 2009

Nadeem Farooq Paracha imagines how a journalistic interview might go…

Salaam, Jamat Bin Jihad Bhai
Walaikumaslam!
How are you today?
Why do you want to know?
Just asking, sir.
You ask too many questions.
But I’m here to interview you!
No, I will speak and you will listen.
But …
Shut up, damn fool man!
But …
Quiet, or I’ll have you beheaded!
Gulp!
What?
I gulped.
Gulped what?
Err … air perhaps?
I thought I told you no questions!
But …
Keep quiet, you kaali chapati!
Kaali chapati?
Yes, that’s what you insects eat in Karachi, don’t you?
Do we? And what do you guys eat?
Is that a question?
Gulp!
You gulped again.
Yes.
Are you drunk?
No!
I think you are. I’ll have you flogged.
But …
Shut up, infidel! 80 lashes for you!
That’s not fair!
Okay, 75.
But …
Keep quiet. Now tell me, why did your newspaper send you here?
We want to know why your people have been flogging young girls?
Stupid question.
How come?
That’s now two stupid questions. Back to 80 lashes!
But, sir, why are you always lashing and flogging and beheading?
Stupid question number three. 101 lashes!
So be it!
Really?
Yes.
Okay, 79 lashes.
But why?
Because we are Muslims!
So are we in Karachi.
Nonsense! You all are pagans and women!
Women? That’s a gender.
How dare you! 109 lashes!
Huh?
Is that a question?
No, I mean …
Shut up, damn fool man! There is only one gender. Male!
How can you say that? God made women too.
1,000 lashes!
But why?
For committing sacralige.
But I didn’t!
You said God made women too.
But he did!
Quiet! 1,070 lashes!
Huh?
Another stupid question.
No it’s not.
Is so.
Is not.
Is so.
Is not.
Is so.
Is not.
Is so.
Okay, is so.
What?
I said, is so. I agree with you.
It’s a sin to let an infidel agree with you! 3,000 lashes!
But it’s your sin!
I am sinless!
But you kill, destroy, spread mayhem, behead, lash and flog!Thank you.
You’re actually proud of this?
Just booking my place in paradise. You should too.
Really? How?
Here.
That’s a suicide jacket.
Yes. It’s cold up here. Wear it.
But I already have a jacket on.
Yes, but it doesn’t have the heavenly warmth of dynamite.
But I’ll die if the dynamite explodes.
Sure, and so would many other people around you.
But why should I kill them?
Because you are a true believer.
Oh, for heaven’s sake!
Exactly.
Can we get back to the girl’s flogging issue?
Wait a minute. Here, you see this goat?
Yes.
This is an educated goat.
Excuse me?
We are replacing girls’ schools with schools for goats.
But goats are animals!
So are women.
Oh, for heaven’s sake!
Exactly.
But why are you educating goats and not girls?
Because goats don’t talk back and aren’t immoral.
But men can be immoral too.
They can?
Of course.
I think you are trying to distract me with secular philosophy.
Tell me, what’s an educated goat like?
Like this one, here.
Yes, but it’s like any other goat.
So what should a goat look like, a dog?
I mean, how is she educated?
Educated goats eat less grass.
That’s crazy.
That’s a scientific fact.
Since when are you into science?
Oh, I know all about science. A djinn taught me.
A djinn taught you science?
Yes.
Can I see him?
He’s gone to Karachi. He does a TV show there.
A TV show?
Yes. He knows all about the conspiracies being hatched against the Muslims.
Really?
Yes, for example, recently he proved how the rays coming from the pyramid-eye on the dollar bill are creating earthquakes and the energy crises in Pakistan.
And you believe that?
Of course. Don’t you?
No.
Infidel! 19,000 lashes!
But I thought you were against watching TV.
I am.
Then what is your djinn doing on TV?
Educating goats.
Oh, for heaven’s sake.
Exactly.
 
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Smokers' Corner: Fluxing with the enemy

By Nadeem F. Paracha
Sunday, 21 Jun, 2009

Here’s an ‘enlightening’ exchange between a news TV anchor and correspondents in Swat and Lahore:
… yes, Khalid, what can you tell us about the situation in Swat?


Well, Sameena, the situation in Swat is pretty bad, people are dying, children are starving and women are wailing!
Khalid, our viewers are well aware of the tragedy, but can you tell us any specific details about the army operation there?

Well, Sameena, the army today claimed to have entered the area of Malam Jabba and fired missiles … but what can I say, Sameena, people are dying, children are starving and women are wailing …'

Okay, so tell us a bit more about the army operation today …

This is a conspiracy, Sameena, a big conspiracy to destabilise and destroy and dismantle and demolish Pakistan! People are dying, children are starving and women are wailing …


Take it easy, Khalid. Please calm down. Give us some news on the IDPs.

Sameena, what can I say. Today our cameraman, Shakir, and I visited a refugee camp in Mardan and all I saw was sorrow, grief, pain and utter anger!

Anger against the Taliban?


Of course not, Sameena. Anger against the government, the army, the Americans, the Indians, and the El Salvadorians!

El Salvadorians?


Yes, and Tutsi and Hutu clans of Rwanda as well.

What are you talking about, Khalid?


What else can one talk about these days, Sameena? People are dying, children are starving and women are wailing …”

Khalid, please remember you are a journalist, so please try to remain calm and objective.

Calm? Calm ki ##$@##$%$#! I am a Muslim first, a proud Arab and …

Arab? But you are a Pakistani, Khalid.

Yes, but my ancestors were Arabs.


Right. Of course. Aren’t we all? Anyway, now, let’s stick to the topic. Tell us what kind of aid has so far reached the refugee camps?

Not aid, Sameena, Aids!

Aids?

Yes, what else can you expect from the infidel West!

But the West has donated millions of dollars …

Yes, only so it can use these refugee camps as human labs to create deadlier strains of the Aids virus with which it wants to wipe out all of Pakistan’s Muslim population!


Khalid, for heavens sake, you are on TV and we are a respectable TV channel! Just give us the basic details about the situation in the refugee camps. Tell us how is the government coping with the refugee influx.

The influx is not because of the Taliban, Sameena. It is because of the pre-marital fluxing going on in Karachi and Lahore!

Khalid, stop talking rubbish!

I am telling you, Sameena. Like the 2005 earthquake, this too is a curse, the wrath of God due to our sins! Repent, repent!
Okay, Khalid, please tell our viewers about the interviews you did with some of the displaced people. How are they adjusting to the tragedy?


We met this old woman, who had come on foot from Swat.

Okay, so what did she tell you about her ordeal?

She was abusing and cursing the government, the army, the Americans, the Zionists, the Indians and the Buddhists of Ceylon for her ordeal!


She was?

Yes, she was.

Did she know any Urdu?

No, she spoke Pashto.

So you know Pashto?

No, I don’t.

Then someone translated what she was saying to you?

No.

Then how did you know what she was saying?

It was obvious, Sameena. This is what every Pakistani is saying: Crush America, crush India, crush Uganda!
No, Khalid, most Pakistanis now want to crush the Taliban …


Lies! Western propaganda! The Swat people love the Taliban, they are our Muslim brothers!

But not sisters?

Huh?

Never mind. But what lies? The Taliban are committing cold-blooded murders, bombing mosques, shrines of sufi saints, chopping off heads, flogging women …

Lies, Sameena! They are really nice guys, standing up to the Americans, the Indians, the Zionists and the Mongols!

Mongols?


Yes, Sameena, Mongols.

What are you talking about, Khalid?

No, what are you talking about?

Excuse me?

No, excuse me!

Khalid?

Sameena?

Khlaid, we are on national television.

Television? Television is haraam! A western conspiracy to brainwash and corrupt young Muslim minds!

But you work for a TV channel!

I do?


Yes!

Oh.

So, now can we have some real news from you then? Can you tell us if the government is planning an operation in Waziristan as well?

Damn them! Why didn’t you tell me?

Err … you’re the reporter, Khalid.

Right. Of course. But, damn them, nonetheless! This is not our war. A well thought-out plan to destroy Pakistan! I can’t take it anymore…

Khalid, what are you doing? Why are you tearing off your shirt?
This is an outrage, Salma.

My name’s Sameena.

Yes, Sakeena.

Sameena!

Right, Parveen! I just want to tell the viewers, I can’t take this injustice anymore! Crush America! Crush India! Crush Iran!
But Iran is a Muslim country, Khalid.

It is?

Yes.

Then crush Nepal! Enough is enough, God is great! Death to the infidels! Boom!


Khalid? Khalid, are you there? We seem to have lost contact with our Swat correspondent. Anyway, let’s move on to the sports news. Let’s talk to our correspondent, Bashir Ahmed, reporting from the Pakistan cricket team’s training camp at the Gaddafi Stadium, Lahore. Yes, Bashir.

Yes, Baajee.

You can call me Sameena. How is the training camp going?

Pretty bad, Sameena. People are dying, children are starving and women are wailing!

My God! Was there a bomb blast there?

No Sameena. But Shoaib Akhtar pulled his left calf muscle while bowling in the nets.

So?

So, I tell you, Sameena, this is a conspiracy by the Elders of Zion funding Godless multinationals and pharmaceutical companies against Pakistani cricket! This is an outrage. I can’t take it anymore...
 
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I actually don't like it when ethnic comedians involve their race or religion in their routine.

I prefer the humor of Arj Barker or Danny Bhoy over that of Russel Peters or Azhar Usman.

I think the best way to get people to accept you as 'normal' is to act 'normal' and not wear a chip on your shoulder.proclaiming your ethnicity or religion. This applies to all non-white comedians -- South Asian, Arab, Chinese, Latino, Black, Carribean, etc.
 
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