Love that transcends borders

[ahojunk]

An unlikely love story between an American teacher and Chinese farmer captures netizens' hearts
BY ALEX LINDER IN NEWS ON DEC 14, 2016 2:50 PM

The tale of how an American woman named Tiffany and a Chinese man named Cai Xiaohua met, fell in love, and got hitched, despite differences in background, class and language has recently gone viral on the Chinese internet.

A reporter from Tianzhong Evening News recently visited the couple at their home in Zhengzhou, the capital of Henan province, and asked them how they managed to find each other starting from different sides of the globe.

Nine years ago, Tiffany was a recent university graduate from New Jersey who was working as an English teacher at an international school in Guangzhou. Meanwhile, Cai Xiaohua was a friendly security guard at the school who was always ready with a warm smile.

"After graduating from college in America, I came to China alone. When I saw someone smile at me, I thought he must be really friendly," Tiffany said.

Cai grew up dirt poor in rural Henan province. When he was only 10 years old, his mother abandoned the family, leaving Cai's father to handle all the work on the family farm. To help his father with the crops, Cai dropped out of school after graduating from middle school. After working a variety odd jobs, he ended up in Guangzhou where he met Tiffany.

Tiffany learned about Cai's life through short conversations when she would see him around school. While Cai didn't know any English, she knew some Chinese, so the two were able to communicate.

Soon, the two fell in love and decided to get hitched.

They got married in Cai's home village in central Henan. Cai's father was relieved. He wasn't sure if his son would ever find someone to marry. "Since he was a little boy, my son has been kind and thoughtful. Good people always get rewarded in life," he said.

After their wedding, the two decided to quit their jobs in Guangzhou and move to Zhengzhou to be closer to Cai's family. Tiffany got a job as an English teacher at a local university, while Cai went home frequently to help out with the family farm.

The couple confessed that because of the language gap, there are still times when they can't understand each other and must resort to charades to get their point across. They say that they still learn from each other every day.

The lovebirds have also flown back to the United States to see Tiffany's family. Her mom and dad both said that they supported their daughter's decision to follow her heart, and also admit an interest in Chinese culture.

Now, Cai, 44, and Tiffany, 35, have a six-year-old daughter. Chinese social media can't get over how cute she is.

Interracial marriages in China are becoming more and more commonplace. Still, when a particularly cute story pops up, that cross-cultural couple becomes a topic of discussion on the Chinese internet. Just last month, photos from a traditional Chinese marriage in Anhui between a local man and his Ukrainian bride went viral online.


********

This Chinese dude struck gold!
.

 

[Beast]

1 in a billion case.

But all the best to this family.

 

[shadows888]

1 in a billion case.

But all the best to this family.

Russian x Chinese more common. Americans tend to stick to their expat areas.

 

[SBUS-CXK]

Forgive my jealousy, they are happy...But...

The body wearing a white T-shirt guy took my goddess.

 

[ahojunk]

I saw the previous TV show. You can also find it on youtube.
And yes, the Indian lady is gorgeous and charming. The Chinese dude is another lucky man!

========
Finnish woman, Chinese man’s holiday ‘romance’ captures internet users’ imagination

Spotlight cast on cross-cultural pair after woman visits Chengdu hometown of her new friend following chance meeting in the Middle East

PUBLISHED : Friday, 16 December, 2016, 1:34pm
UPDATED : Friday, 16 December, 2016, 2:17pm

The friends take a selfie while Margaret was visiting Zou Yifei in China. Photo: Handout

Following recent reports of the marriage of an American teacher and a Chinese farmer that went viral online, Chinese media have turned the spotlight on a budding relationship between a Chinese man and a Finnish woman.

Zou Yifei, who works at a power supply company in the southwestern city of Chengdu, met a Finnish woman who grew up in Jerusalem, identified only by her first name Margaret, while he was visiting the Dead Sea in February, the Chengdu Commercial Daily reported.

Zou showed Margaret photos he had taken of his home country on his camera, and explained to her what China was like. “I showed her where Chengdu was on a map,” Zou was quoted as saying.

Margaret poses beside Lugu Lake during her month-long visit to China. Photo: Handout

She also invited him to a family gathering and showed him around nearby scenic spots during his stay, after which he invited her to visit his hometown of Chengdu.

To Zou’s surprise, Margaret sent him a screenshot of her air ticket to China six months after they first met and told him she was going to stay in Chengdu for a month.

Zou arranged a room for her to stay at his house in Chengdu and returned her hospitality by taking her to the city’s scenic sites. On the day of her departure, he presented her with a surprise present – a handmade wooden ring.

Zou Yifei works for a power supply company in Chengdu. Photo: Handout

However, when asked if they are in a romantic relationship, the pair said they would “go with the flow” and not push things.

“Many people are wondering if we are together now, but to me, the feeling we have now is quite enough. Why do we have to be together or not?” Zou was quoted as saying.

Their story was first shared by the company Zou works for on its official WeChat account, after which their friendship gained media attention and the tale went viral on the internet.

Reports of farmers or other working-class people marrying foreigners are popular themes in Chinese media, as such intercultural marriages are seen as a novelty.


*******

Another story.
When you have such a large population, you will have inter-racial marriage.
What is more important is the person's character and personality, not the person's race.
.

 

[xunzi]

I have to say our gene produce very cute baby with white women. Congrats to that American lady with a cute baby. LOL

 

[ahojunk]

Anhui man brings Ukrainian bride back home to China for a traditional wedding
BY ALEX LINDER IN NEWS ON NOV 8, 2016 2:00 PM

Photos from a traditional marriage ceremony that took place recently in Jieshou city, Anhui province have caught the attention of the Chinese internet thanks to the non-traditional nationality of the bride-to-be.

The groom, 28-year-old Gao Tianyu, is an Anhui-native who moved to the Ukraine to study after graduating from high school. When he was done with school there, he stayed on to begin a business, NetEase reports.

On the streets of Kiev, one day four years ago, Gao spotted a local girl that made his heart skip a beat. He summoned up all his courage and started a conversation with her. Now, that girl has become his bride, a 22-year-old identified as "Alina."

For four years, the couple had worked and lived together in the Ukraine. However, Gao was constantly homesick. This year, he and Alina finally decided to travel back to China to get married. They also decided to stay there afterward to begin their new life together.

The pair even opted for a very traditional Chinese wedding ceremony. You can check out some pictures below:

"There really are a lot of beautiful women in the Ukraine," one netizen commented after viewing the pictures.

 

[ahojunk]

Ukrainian proposes to Chinese boyfriend in panda costume
BY KATIE NELSON IN NEWS ON FEB 16, 2015 10:00 AM

The story of a Ukrainian woman who made a surprise proposal to her boyfriend while dressed in a panda costume in Chengdu, Sichuan province has been lighting up the web.

The 26-year-old woman, identified as Sasha, put on her best panda costume and danced to the popular song "Xiao Pingguo" at a pavilion of a scenic spot in Dujiangyan as her boyfriend was visiting there the morning of February 14. When the song ended, she pulled off her panda head (the romance) and knelt down on one knee to propose to her 26-year-old beau, Dabin.

The woman travelled to Dujiangyan around a year ago and had hoped to find her "Prince Charming". On her train ride back to Chengdu after a trip, she met Dabin and the two hit it off, according to a friend.

Sasha had lived in Chengdu for three years and started studying her Chinese more intensely as soon as she began dating Dabin. He got to work on learning English as well.

Sasha said she'd been planning a surprise proposal for a while and settled on the panda theme because he often affectionately called her his "panda".

Dabin has already been to Ukraine to meet Sasha's parents, and she's met his family several times when they traveled home for the holidays.


********

Nowadays, it is perfectly okay for a girl to propose and ask her boyfriend to get married.
Why? Some boys are not brave enough to propose. They need a little prodding to get married.
.

 

[shadows888]

Ukrainian proposes to Chinese boyfriend in panda costume
BY KATIE NELSON IN NEWS ON FEB 16, 2015 10:00 AM

View attachment 363350

The story of a Ukrainian woman who made a surprise proposal to her boyfriend while dressed in a panda costume in Chengdu, Sichuan province has been lighting up the web.

The 26-year-old woman, identified as Sasha, put on her best panda costume and danced to the popular song "Xiao Pingguo" at a pavilion of a scenic spot in Dujiangyan as her boyfriend was visiting there the morning of February 14. When the song ended, she pulled off her panda head (the romance) and knelt down on one knee to propose to her 26-year-old beau, Dabin.

View attachment 363351

The woman travelled to Dujiangyan around a year ago and had hoped to find her "Prince Charming". On her train ride back to Chengdu after a trip, she met Dabin and the two hit it off, according to a friend.

Sasha had lived in Chengdu for three years and started studying her Chinese more intensely as soon as she began dating Dabin. He got to work on learning English as well.

View attachment 363352

View attachment 363353

Sasha said she'd been planning a surprise proposal for a while and settled on the panda theme because he often affectionately called her his "panda".

View attachment 363354

View attachment 363355

Dabin has already been to Ukraine to meet Sasha's parents, and she's met his family several times when they traveled home for the holidays.


********

Nowadays, it is perfectly okay for a girl to propose and ask her boyfriend to get married.
Why? Some boys are not brave enough to propose. They need a little prodding to get married.
.

whats up with so many Ukrainians?

 

[ahojunk]

whats up with so many Ukrainians?

.
Nothing wrong if they are compatible and love each other.

I am pro marriages where the couple love each other and get along well regardless of their race. The character and personality of the person is more important.

For example, one of my cousin married a lady who is the same race as him. His wife is sh*t. Our extended family don't like her.

Another of my cousin married a lady of another race. His wife is a great lady. Our entire extended family like her very much. In fact, we celebrated Christmas at their place last night. Also, their 3 children are very good looking and intelligent. Their daughter just got a first class honors from Melbourne University. (I teased my cousin that his children's intelligence is from their mum, not from him. He reluctantly agreed.)

 

[oprih]

Ukrainian proposes to Chinese boyfriend in panda costume
BY KATIE NELSON IN NEWS ON FEB 16, 2015 10:00 AM

View attachment 363350

The story of a Ukrainian woman who made a surprise proposal to her boyfriend while dressed in a panda costume in Chengdu, Sichuan province has been lighting up the web.

The 26-year-old woman, identified as Sasha, put on her best panda costume and danced to the popular song "Xiao Pingguo" at a pavilion of a scenic spot in Dujiangyan as her boyfriend was visiting there the morning of February 14. When the song ended, she pulled off her panda head (the romance) and knelt down on one knee to propose to her 26-year-old beau, Dabin.

View attachment 363351

The woman travelled to Dujiangyan around a year ago and had hoped to find her "Prince Charming". On her train ride back to Chengdu after a trip, she met Dabin and the two hit it off, according to a friend.

Sasha had lived in Chengdu for three years and started studying her Chinese more intensely as soon as she began dating Dabin. He got to work on learning English as well.

View attachment 363352

View attachment 363353

Sasha said she'd been planning a surprise proposal for a while and settled on the panda theme because he often affectionately called her his "panda".

View attachment 363354

View attachment 363355

Dabin has already been to Ukraine to meet Sasha's parents, and she's met his family several times when they traveled home for the holidays.


********

Nowadays, it is perfectly okay for a girl to propose and ask her boyfriend to get married.
Why? Some boys are not brave enough to propose. They need a little prodding to get married.
.

So cute!

 

[ahojunk]

The diary of a foreign daughter-in-law during Spring Festival in South China
2017-02-06 16:57 chinadaily.com.cn Editor:Xu Shanshan

Jessica and her husband Ming Jie spend Spring Festival at Ming's hometown in Zhanjiang city, South China's Guangdong province. (Photo provided by Jessica to chinadaily.com.cn)

"Jia Mu-eh!" my husband's mother shouts loudly from the outdoor kitchen. "Jia Mu-eh" means having dinner in the dialect of my husband's hometown in Zhanjiang city, South China's Guangdong province. This is the only phrase I know. Thankfully though, most of his relatives can speak Mandarin, so communicating with them is not a big issue. The only ones who cannot understand me are his little cousins. They won't start studying Mandarin until they enter kindergarten. My husband's English is better than my Chinese, so he's my personal translator when I can't speak what I want to say.

This is my fourth time visiting his hometown and the first time as his wife. We got our marriage license last year, a day before we went back to Beijing so there wasn't much time for celebration besides a shot of baijiu and congratulations all around.

Typically, my husband and I will take the "slow" train from Beijing, where we live, to Zhanjiang. A 37-hour trip in a sleeper car. Due to work this year, we had to travel separately, him leaving a week before me. He, once again, rode the train and I, for the first time, flew there. For me, four hours was much more tolerable than 37. Landing on the tiny runway at the airport in Zhanjiang was the start of my holiday.

Jessica helps with the hens at her husband's home in Zhanjiang city, South China's Guangdong province, earlier this month. (Photo provided by Jessica to chinadaily.com.cn)

Getting off the plane and feeling that warm and breezy fresh air hit my face was enough to make me want to stay for a few months. I was so run down and tired of Beijing's cold and dry weather. What a difference four hours can make! My husband greeted me at the airport and while we waited at the bus stop, we had a few black taxis come over and ask if we wanted a ride. This was after my husband told them I was his wife. "WA!" followed by a long rambling of local dialect was the response. A small bus, about half of the size of a bus in Beijing, pulled up and we got on.

We have to spend one hour traveling to a place called Dong Hai Dao. This is where his parents live. It's a small fishing village about one hour outside of Zhanjiang. The road is full of twists, turns, bumps, and tall buildings under construction. Signs pointing to nearby villages line the road. Our bus has to slow down in order to let the cow cross the road. After battling a bout of motion sickness, we arrive. Situated next to a small convenient store, their two story home looks shabby next to a fairly new apartment complex. The current house is about 17 years old and was built by hand by my husband's father and grandfather. A proud accomplishment that not many can claim. Later this year though, the house will be torn down and rebuilt.

As we walk in, we are greeted by my husband's brother, sister, and older cousin. Later, followed by his aunts and uncles. Many extended family members live in this place. I'd say more than 10 of his relatives live in the building. His mother and father were busy farming shrimp on the island they rent offshore. I would not see them until the following day. The house itself is quite lively. In Spring Festival tradition, everyone is reunited, back home safe and sound. There are no decorations or ornaments adorning the walls or door that would indicate it's Spring Festival however. The only thing you would notice is that there is a lot more incense burning in the living room.

Since it's my fourth year here, I'm quite familiar with the traditions of my husband's family and what should be done. Most days though, we stayed at home. I am in no way shape or form a good cook, but I'll do my best to help his sister or mom prepare some dishes for lunch or dinner. After eating, I was able to help my husband set off some firecrackers outside the house in order to keep the bad luck away. The house is in poor condition, but the happiness and love that fills the house can repair every crack and break in the foundation.

Jessica washes shrimps at her husband's home in Zhanjiang city, South China's Guangdong province, during Spring Festival. (Photo provided by Jessica to chinadaily.com.cn)

Now, this is a fishing village so every meal we eat typically consists of crab, oysters/clams, fish, or shrimp. I'm originally from a small town in the mid-west so I never grew up on seafood. I still can't get used to it. Everything is freshly caught off the island they farm. Most people would probably call me crazy for not eating as much as I could. Some of it I like, some I don't. Unfortunately, if I eat too much of it, I end up getting sick. My husband, on the other hand, is like a bottomless pit.

Over the next few days, we'll be quite busy. Each time we're home, we spend a lot of time on the island that the family farms. This island is known as "nan ping dao." It's about 10 kilometers round and uninhabited by people. The only people who go there are the farmers to fish or farm their shrimp pools. The island is full of wild goats, cows, chickens, and cats as well. There are a few shanties strewn across the island, used by farmers who work at night or need to have a rest and cook a meal.

Jessica and her husband, first from left, peel shrimp with family members at their home in Zhanjiang city, South China's Guangdong province. (Photo provided by Jessica to chinadaily.com.cn)

My husband and I will go there with his brother and sister to barbecue chicken and walk around, enjoying the fresh air and scenery. Strangely enough, you wouldn't believe how many shoes I've found walking along the beach. As we walk along the beach, my husband will take a shovel and net along with him so we can dig for sand crabs and oysters or clams. In the evening, we take our haul back to his parent's house and that's what we call dinner. Watching the sunset from the beach on that island, is a little tradition my husband and I share.

For family traditions on the eve of Spring Festival, my husband will set off firecrackers at midnight and the living room light must be left on all night. From Lunar New Year's Day to the Lantern Festival, my husband must burn incense in the living room and make offerings of rice and oranges.

Jessica shows off oysters caught at her husband's hometown in Zhanjiang city, South China's Guangdong province. (Photo provided by Jessica to chinadaily.com.cn)

The first day of the new year, my husband and I will go to his hometown's local temple to pray for a prosperous new year. Next, we'll travel to his ancestor's old home to pray again as well, followed by hanging the red scrolls across the top of the door and on the sides. Throughout the week, there will be large reunion dinners at different relatives' houses such as his maternal grandmother's house and cousin's home. Also, a large dinner is held here as well. More than 40 people attend every year. My husband comes from a big family. Fortunately, because of all the children in the family, we aren't pressured by any of the family to have kids.

As another Spring Festival comes to an end, we'll return to Beijing and get back to the daily grind. Before we left, we took some family photos. One photo involved my husband's grandparents, parents, brother and sister. As I stood off to the side and looked on, my husband extended his hand and said, "You're in the photo too." I said, "It's supposed to be just your family." He looked at me and said, "You are my family. We're a family." So, with that, my heart melted and I stood next to him as he held my waist for the photo.

Jessica and her husband trim vegetables at their home in Zhanjiang city, South China's Guangdong province. (Photo provided by Jessica to chinadaily.com.cn)

So, another Spring Festival has come and gone. I've grown closer with his family and truly am starting to feel that I can call his family, MY family and his home, MY home. I can't express how grateful I am for the hospitality his family has shown me over the past four years. I really feel like their daughter. I've lived in China for over six years now and I can say, without a doubt, Spring Festival is one of my favorite times of the year.

What affects me I guess is how poor everyone is yet they can still be happy. They don't care about the complicated trivial things outside of the village. Just care about living. We care so much about what's happening in the world and politics but those people they aren't even aware of what's going on or they don't care.

New Year's Eve dinner at Jessica and her husband's home in Zhanjiang city, South China's Guangdong province. (Photo provided by Jessica to chinadaily.com.cn)

Jessica joins in a family photo. (Photo provided by Jessica to chinadaily.com.cn)

 

[ahojunk]

Western women share how they find and maintain the romance with their Chinese partners
By Yin Lu | Source: Global Times | Published: 2017/2/13 17:18:39

Expat women in a relationship with Chinese men say Chinese men are romantic, just in a different, less showy way. Photos: IC.

Hungarian Viktoria Varadi has been married to her Chinese husband for four years. This Valentine's Day, the couple is having a second wedding in Las Vegas.

"It was his idea," said Varadi, 30. "He had traveled to the US and said it was so much fun that we should go as a couple, which I think is really romantic."

Having lived in China for the past seven years, Varadi, who is currently traveling across the US with her husband, has heard talk that Chinese men are comparatively less romantic than Westerners. But for her, it could not be farther from the truth.

"Before I met my husband, my friends used to tell me about this," she said. "But my husband is not the shy type."

According to Varadi, Chinese men can be romantic, just in a very practical, down-to-earth way that conforms with Chinese culture. Her experience is mirrored in other cross-cultural relationships where a foreign woman is dating or is married to a Chinese man.

This Valentine's Day, Metropolitan invited some Western women who date or are married to Chinese men to talk about the view of Chinese men in the romance department and how their partners keep the spark alive.

Practical romance

For Varadi, her husband makes her feel that he is constantly thinking about her. He is always attentive to her needs, even when she is not aware of it, and this is quite romantic.

She cited an instance where she was lying on the couch video-chatting with her parents and he brought a pillow and put it under her neck for proper support. He also cooks her favorite dishes, reminds her to drink water and takes excellent care of her when she is ill.

"I think he is a quite practical person. Sometimes we go out to dine at a nice restaurant, or he would buy me flowers, but I can feel that it's not exactly his style," Varadi said.

"He does a lot of things that I consider very important and meaningful. Anyone could buy you flowers, but he is the only one who always thinks about what he can do for you. I can feel that he loves and values me."

For Doris Nilsson (pseudonym), 26, who comes from Switzerland, it's also her Chinese man's "practical romance" that charms her. She has been with her Chinese boyfriend for two years.

Conceding that her boyfriend is not very romantic on commercial festive days like Valentine's Day, Christmas or New Year's Day, Nilsson said he is nonetheless quite good at making her feel cherished.

"He can be romantic just out of nothing on any other day by just inviting me to a special restaurant, cooking breakfast for me, or by simply saying I love you," she said.

Nilsson and her boyfriend initially had very different ideas about romance, but over the past two years, her mind has been changing.

"I always connected being romantic with getting red roses, being invited for a candlelit dinner in a secluded area and getting a flower bouquet with a card delivered to work - the typical 'Hollywood romance,'" she said.

"[But now] the small things and surprises, such as spontaneous weekend trips and cooking for your partner are worth much more to me."

Open-mindedness, excellent communication, and an understanding of your partner's culture background are key to having a rewarding relationship with your Chinese boyfriend or husband, according to women interviewed by Metropolitan. Photos: IC


It's not about the glitter

For Charlotte Edwards, 33, an American who lives with her Chinese husband in Cangzhou, Hebei Province, romance does not have to be showy or expensive.

The couple prefers to spend time together more than anything else, and Edwards' husband buys her flowers and writes a love note every Valentine's Day.

She recalled how early on in their relationship her husband did not know about the holiday, and funds were tight, so she planned a scavenger hunt that ended with a nice dinner and chocolates at home.

"The notes mean a lot to me since I can keep them much longer than flowers," Edwards said.

"What we do for the holiday pales in comparison to what others do, but it's what makes us happy. I value being together more than gifts and dinners, so I'm OK with our quiet nights together."

While the romance was always there, Edwards said her husband has improved as he became more exposed to other ways of expressing affection. "Over the years, he's read news about how spend-crazy Americans go for Valentine's Day," Edwards said.

Showing affection isn't common in Chinese culture, she explained, citing how he initially found it odd that she would tell their baby "I love you" every day.

"When we're out, he'll hold my hand or put an arm around me. That's something I don't see much of where we live," she said.

"He watches a lot of American TV shows and films. I think younger guys may have a different perception of romance [because] they've grown up with access to Western media."


'Typical' Chinese men

On top of being not romantic enough, it seems there are also some other stereotypes of Asian men in the West.

For example, they might be considered shy, introverted, geeky, and good at video games and math, but not sexy or attractive enough, according to Western standards. Nilsson said although such descriptions match some of the Chinese men she has come across, it does not represent all of them.

"It is just an outdated statement on the Web," she said.

"There are also very attractive Chinese men on the streets. In my opinion, you can find the good video players, the shy and introverted young men, and the math geniuses in the Western world as well."

Varadi has heard about the stereotypes, too. She conceded that one could say that generally many Chinese men are shy about expressing their affection, but said everybody is different.

One good thing she noticed after dating and marrying a Chinese man is that it seems the couple is better connected in the Chinese context.

For example, she and her husband now share food from each other's plate, which makes her feel a sense of oneness with him.

"I am not sure if this is very Chinese. But it makes me feel that when we are together, we really are a team. There's no me or him. It's us, our things, our plans, our problems and our accomplishments," she said.

"In the West, even if you are a couple, you are independent in a lot of things, and they would value personal space more."


A Western girl's guide

For cross-cultural couples to have a relationship that is fulfilling for both parties, Nilsson said being honest with oneself while trying to be open-minded, especially in the beginning, is very important.

"For me, it was super weird that my boyfriend always switched sides with me when walking next to me on the street. So, one day, I asked him why he did it and the answer was, 'in case a car comes I can protect you. It will hit me first before you,'" she said. "I first thought he was crazy. But then it is just sweet."

She added that good communication is the foundation of any good, rewarding relationship.

After their first five months together, Nilsson and her boyfriend were separated in different countries and time zones due to work. She said they made it work with a lot of WeChat video calls.

"Due to the daily calls we had, which were obviously only based on our communication, we got to know each other even more," she said.

Edwards stressed the importance of understanding your partner's cultural background and where he comes from as well as compromise, especially on things that aren't crucial.

For example, her mother-in-law was insistent that her children not wear diapers, and although Edwards had her opinion on it, it wasn't important, so she compromised.

Nilsson's advice is that couples should "respect each other's cultural background and be open-minded to learn something new."

"[Being open-minded and willing to learn new things] for me, is definitely learning how to make homemade dumplings and learning the language to be able to communicate with his parents, which is currently the biggest challenge," she said.


********

Marrying someone from another race/culture - be prepared for lots of adjustments and compromises.
Otherwise, the marriage won't work.
Regardless, always treat your wife with respect. Lose the battle but win the war.
.