Fact is most Indians have never been to Kashmir and most Kashmiris have never been to rest of India. Since the rest of India is united - even the Maoists talk of overthrowing the government - not of balkanizing India - we don't have any empathy with the Kashmiris.
However, I do have Kashmiri Muslim friends. When I heard some stories of how the Army behaves with the local population - I can see why people are angry. I too would be if my brother was kidnapped and beaten black and blue simply because some security guy liked his watch and he refused to hand it over.
On the flip side, the same guy now resides in Bombay and he wonders what the fuss is all about - everyone here seems to get along and he is shocked at seeing Muslims drink, inter-marry people of other faiths etc. It was like a culture shock for him.
And let's be honest - anyone who has studied history can tell you that while the Treaty of Accession was signed - only communication and foreign affairs were to be handled by India and Kashmir would have its own Prime Minister. We also know that even in 1965 - it was the local Kashmiris who told India about the Pakistani invasion.
But then you have the circumvention of democracy by trying to completely integrate Kashmir as an Indian state. I can see Kashmir becoming a semi-independent state like Scotland is in UK - own flag, own anthem, own parliament, own sports team etc. As an Indian, I would even be fine with it. Integration with Pakistan?? LOL - talk about moving the people from the frying pan to the fire. It's not going to happen.
Complete independence - that is a crazy pipe dream. It would mean Kashmir would be landlocked nation and 3 big countries would have to cede their lands to make an independent Kashmir - India, Pakistan and China. They are not exactly the giving types. Also, given the sizeable Hindu and Buddhist populations - if it goes the Pakistan way and becomes a theocratic Muslim state with blasphemy laws and people signing documents insulting the Ahmaddiyas - then current Indian citizens of Hindu and Buddhist faiths automatically become secondary citizens. I am unsure of the religious demographics of China occupied Kashmir but that too could be a roadblock.