Joke

[Imran Khan]

last one i like ijaz thanks for post

 

[Shoaib_Sham]

GOOD SHOW NEO ! you are 1000% right............ yes absolutely the main prob is "NORTH OF PKISTAN"" . no doubt all kind of illness, injury, an accedants, when ever happened in USA ,,ust bcoz of NORTHERN PAKISTN..but more?? now northern jihadies deciede that instead of attacking they wil breath and blow the air full of northern bacterias too USA.wow, and bush got this news and thas why he ws visiting all countries in the world.. as he said that noe he left 90 countries unity including PAKISTN and ARABS........ Good Shot Neo.

Lets drill it one level more. Its north west of Pakistan not NORTHERN PAKISTAN. Cause trust me in North we have some absolutely amazing peace loving and education crazy People.
Ever wonder whats the literacy rate in Hunza i.e. fartherest town of Pakistan's North.

 

[Imran Khan]

ایک آدمی اپنے بیٹے کے لیے طوطا خریدنے کے لیے ایک دکان پر گیا۔ اس نے دیکھا کہ ایک پنجرے میں تین طوطے ہیں۔اس نے دکاندار سے پوچھاکہ دائیں طرف والے طوطے کی کیا قیمت ہے۔ دکاندار نے کہا 500روپے۔ آدمی بولا کہ اس میں کیا خوبی ہے دکاندار نے جواب دیا کہ یہ آفس 2000کو آپریٹ کرنا جانتا ہے۔
آدمی نے پوچھا کہ درمیان والے طوطے کی کیا قیمت ہے۔ دکاندار بولا 1000روپے آدمی نے کہا کہ اس میں کیا خوبی ہے دکاندار بولا کہ یہ آفس کے علاوہ پروگرامینگ میں بھی ماہرہے۔
آدمی نے آخری طوطے کی قیمت پوچھی تو دکاندار نے جواب دیا 2000روپے آدمی نے حیران ہو کر پوچھا کہ اس میں کیا خاص بات ہے دکاندار بولا سچی بات تو یہ ہے کہ میں نے آج تک اس کو کچھہ کرتے نہیں دیکھا بس دوسرے دونوں طوطے اس کو باس(افس&#1585 کہتے ہیں۔​

 

[Imran Khan]

خواتینن کے عالمی دن کی ایک تقریب منعقد کی گئ جس میں تمام ممالک سے خواتین نے شرکت کی۔ اجلاس شروع کیا گیا۔
سب سے پہلے چین کی خاتون نے کہا کہ پچھلے سال کی تقریب کے بعد میں نے گھر جا کر اپنے خاوند سے کہا کہ کل سے کپڑے تم دھوؤ گے۔ اگلے دن میں اٹھی تو کچھ نہیں نظر آیا ، دوسرے دن کپڑے دھلے ہوئے تھے۔
پھر امریکہ کی خاتون اٴٹھی اور بولی کی میں نے پچھلے سال کی تقریب کے بعد اپنے خاوند سے کہا کہ کل سے برتن تم دھوؤ گے۔ اگلے دن میں اٹھی تو کچھ نہیں نظر آیا ، دوسرے دن برتن دھلے ہوئے تھے۔
اسی طرح تمام ممالک کی خواتین نے اپنی اپنی کامیابی کا ذکر فخر سے کیا۔

آخر میں پاکستان کی نمائندہ خاتون اُٹھیں اور بولیں پچھلے سال کی تقریب کے بعد گھر جا کر میں نے بھی اپنے خاوند سے کہا کہ کل سے کھانا تم بناؤ گے۔ اگلے دن میں اٹھی تو کچھ نہیں نظر آیا، دوسرے دن میں اٹھی تو بھی کچھ نہیں نظر آیا۔ تیسرے دن سوُجن اتری تو تھوڑا تھوڑا نظر آنے لگا۔

​

 

[was]

 

[U-571]

LOL!!

 

[A1Kaid]

LOL!!

wW09fGSp1mE[/media] - Indian men have small penises...Too small for regular condom

That video should not be in the "JOKE" thread, that is actually very serious news. A very embarrassing news story for the whole of Hindu India and it's Men.

 

[AliFarooq]

Lmao

 

[Black Stone]

lol that was funny.

 

[U-571]

PUSHTO REMAKES OF POPULAR HOLLYWOOD MOVIES

I KNOW WHAT YOU DID LAST SUMMER
ANDHERI RAAT MEIN …DIYA MALIK SAAB KE HAATH MEIN

JAWS JABRA SHAITANI

ROBOCOP BATTERY WALA POLICEMAN

ROCKY BALBOA BUZURG BOXER

AN INCONVENIENT TRUTH AL GORE KA KHANA KHARAB AMERICAN MAHOL

TERMINATOR GUL KHAN 1600 C.C

KING KONG ITNA BARA MAKRANI

PRETTY WOMAN HUSN BANO PESHAWARI

JAMES BOND 007 ZAANI JASOOS

LION KING SHER KHAN CARTOONI

SPIDER MAN BAHADUR MACHAR

BROKEBACK MOUNTAIN TEXAS KE PATHAN

FAHRENHEIT 9/11 ISHTIHAARI BUSH

 

[roopesh]

That video should not be in the "JOKE" thread, that is actually very serious news. A very embarrassing news story for the whole of Hindu India and it's Men.

How abt chineese? INDIA and CHINA taking 25% population of the world

 

[linkinpark]

NAKED LUNCH: Blow daddy

Friday, 02 Jan, 2009 | 12:46 PM PST |
Nadeem F. Paracha


Daddy?
Yes, son.
Are we going to have a war with India?
Perhaps.
Oh, goody. We will thrash them, right? Like we did in 1857!
It wasn’t in 1857, son.
Oh, okay. But whom did we thrash in 1857?
The British, son…
And the Hindus too, right?
Well…
Did Quaid-i-Azam fight in that war along with Muhammad bin Qasim and Imran Khan?
No, son. The Quaid and Imran were born much later and Muhammad bin Qasim died many years before.
Then who ruled Pakistan in those days?
There was no Pakistan in those days, son.
But there was always a Pakistan! It has been there for 5,000 years!
Who have you been talking to, son?
No one. I’ve just been watching TV.
It figures.
Daddy, why are all these people against us Arabs?
Arabs? But we aren’t Arabs, son.
Of course we are because our ancestors were Arabs!
No, son. Our ancestors were of the subcontinental stock.
Sub-what?
Never mind.You seem to like wars, son.
Yes. I like to watch them on TV.
But real wars are fought outside the TV, son.
Really? How is that possible? What sort of a war is that?
Never mind.
Daddy, you look worried.
Of course, I am, you little warmongering punk!
Daddy! Why are you scolding me?
Because TV is talking rot and so are you!
Daddy, are you supporting Hindus?
No!
Daddy, have you become a kafir?
Keep quiet! No more TV for you! Go watch a movie on DVD or listen to a CD.
Can’t do that.
But we have so many DVDs and CDs, son.
Not any more.
What do you mean?
I burned them all.
What?!
I burned them all.
I heard that! But why?
They spread obscenity.
Oh, God. Son, go do your homework. What happened to that science project you were working on?
It’s almost complete.
Good boy. What are you making?
A bomb.
What?!
A bomb.
I heard that! But why?
Because I am a true Muslim who hates America.
But only last week you wanted to go to Disney Land.
That’s different.
How come?
Mickey Mouse is Muslim.
No, he isn’t.
Is so. He converted when he heard azaan on the moon.
On the moon?
Yes. Because the earth is flat and…
What??
The earth is…
I heard that!
Daddy, do you want to see my science project, or not?
Gosh, that bomb? But your science teacher will fail you.
No, she wont.
Really?
Yes. I plan to blow her up as well.
God, what is wrong with you? Go call your mother!
She can’t come.
Why not?
I’ve locked her in the kitchen.
But what for?
A woman’s place is in the kitchen. I will not let her out until she covers herself up peoperly!
But she’s your mother!
She’s also a woman!
So?
So she should be hidden.
Hidden from whom?
The whole world and Tony.
Tony?
Yes, Tony.
But Tony’s a cat.
Yes. But he’s male.
Son, have you gone mad?
No. By the way, I’ve made sure Kitto starts covering up as well.
Kitto?
Yes, Kittto.
But Kitto’s a cat!
Yes. But a female cat.
But she’ll suffocate.
Oh, she’s already dead.
What?
She’s already dead.
I heard that! But how?
I buried her alive.
You what?
Yes. To avenge Tony’s honour. But now I will behead Tony.
But why?
To save mom’s honour!
Oh, God!
Don’t say that. Always say Allah.
What’s the difference?
Daddy, do you want to be beheaded too?
No!
Do you want to be stoned to death?
No!
Do you want to be flogged?
No!
Do you want to get your arms chopped off?
No!
Then stop asking silly questions. By the way, I won’t call you daddy anymore.
What will you call me then?
Whatever that is Arabic for daddy.
I don’t know any Arabic, son.
That’s because you are a kafir.
Who the heck are you to tell me who I am, you little fascist twit!
What’s a fascist?
An irrational, violent, self-righteous mad man!
W... aaaaaaa...
Why are you crying?
You scolded me.
Okay, I’m sorry. You have to be tolerant and rational, son. Now be a good boy and go read a book instead of watching TV.
I have no books.
Of course, you do. I bought you so many books.
I burned them.
What?
I burned them.
But why?
They were all in English.
So?
It’s a non-Muslim language!
But we are speaking English, aren’t we?
W... aaaaaaa…
What now?
Zionists made me forget my Arabic.
But you never knew any Arabic, son.
W... aaaa… yes, I did until you and mommy gave me the polio drops… aaaaa…
Okay, tell me, can you do me a favour?
Sure, dad.
Can you blow up something for me?
Oh, goody! Of course, dad. What should I blow? A CD shop, a hotel, a school...?
No, no, something a lot more sinister.
Mom?
No, no…
What then?
The TV set!
What?
Blow the TV set.
I heard that! But why?
Just do it!
I see. Dad?
Yes.
You’re so unconstitutional!

 

[AliFarooq]

Rofl tht made my day.



should have posted this in the joke section though.

 

[Beskar]

Cheap attempt at being sarcastic. The whole thing could be turned around against any nation in a minute.

Anyway, this doesn't belong here. "National Political Issues"?!?! Ha!

 

[Rajkumar]

it couldn't more funny