Why do Pakistanis complain about Indian 'aggression'? What India is doing is furthering its national agenda and protecting its national interests.
If friendship for Pakistanis mean Kashmir, then sorry there cannot be any rapprochement.
So is Pakistan... at least what it perceives are its national interests. However, National interests cannot deter additional positives that come from rapprochement. Kashmir has nothing to do with Kashmiris.. they can all die of indigestion of Wazwan for all Pakistan cares. ensuring critical water supply and ensuring key nodes is the main point. Water you deal with by keeping Kashmir hot.
However, lately the more business-minded and rather realistically grounded people have realized that there is much more to be gained from milking the proverbial gorging cow that is India rather than being trampled under it. That does not go down well when milking the cow needs letting the water cool down in Kashmir as that means the certain elements in the establishment with with their aspirations on certain strategies will be left at square one. i.e facing an essentially failed situation regarding its efforts vis-a-vis Kashmir. After all, what India does through its efforts in Afghanistan needs to be avenged there and in Kashmir. On the other side of the border, it means for the Indian Military to downplay its efforts in maintaining the upper hand in this game for Kashmir. Considering all the blood lost in the 90's and the tireless hours spend cooking strategy after strategy to win by sheer effort and determination....end up being bookmarked and kept on a shelf. After all, bring it down to the common soldier sitting in those heights.. and tell them..that the three comrades they lost.. one to cold.. one to being shot..and the other to a ravine.. all to keep an enemy at bay.. are now old news and they must go and hug the same fellow they literally froze their buns off to keep in vigil at. Could you, as a military leader.. do that?
So the militaries of both nations have a lot of role to play(despite the high horse of Indian Army's subservient nature.. it does have opinion that is listened to). These opinions come to the press(pushed or otherwise) and then to your ears. That cycle then repeats and so on. Now, unless one takes the steps to break the cycle despite the hurdles(and Manmohan Singh deserves credit for it regardless of him being called spineless and what not) it comes to pass that despite differing National interests.. there is still the grey and detached area where progress for the benefit of each other can be made. How does one get to that commitment to the cautious rapprochement process? Well, I see only one way and that is interaction. Unless you meet and greet.. get to know the people you hate that much.. you cannot be anything but nuclear in your thoughts.