8 Things from India that Pakistan must ban Right Now

[Laozi]

The high road is for suckers. Know what's the best way to deal with conflict? Retaliation!

First India banned our actors, then our drama serials; what's next? We need to show them who's boss.

This means that anything remotely Indian must go. Let's start with these eight:

1) Abs, especially Ranveer Singh's
We can't tell you how many Pakistani women have been disarmed by Ranveer Singh's abs.

Or how many people have been immobilised by Katrina Kaif's bod.

Surely this is a ploy to weaken us. Ban abs!

Abs are decidedly Indian. Ban them.


2) Vin Diesel
He was adorably fast and furious before he signed on to star in xXx: Return of Xander Cage with Deepika Padukone.

But now, with all that steamy cosying up, he's got Deepika cooties for sure. And Deepika is Indian, after all.

We declare Vin to be Indian by association.

So what if he's got a bod to die for? No more Vin! No more Vin!

Why Deepika, Vin? WHY?


FYI: The jury's still out on Dwayne Johnson.

We can smell what The Rock is cooking... and it smells like Bollywood


3) Coldplay
The band had no problem appropriating Indian culture and offering bit partsto Sonam Kapoor.

But they don't come to Pakistan to shoot music videos on roofs and cash in on our slums. WHY? Discrimination. Ban them!

We're not going to let them gora the explorer on our turf!


4) Mangoes
This Katrina is a big troublemaker. First the abs, then she gets up close and personal with a mango in this ad campaign.

Sorry Aamir Liaquat, we know this is the ultimate sacrifice, but anything licked by an Indian has to go.

BAN MANGOES!

That's being said, let's all lovingly look at Pakistan the way Katrina looks at this mango


5) Excessive gesticulation
Pfft, being too animated is for traitors. Aggressive arm movements are not for us.

And we thought SRK was bad, what with Modi's signature moves and all...


Aim to be a potato instead.

Here is a totally unrelated picture of our Prime Minister.

6) Weight loss
Let Adnan Sami be the prime example of how treacherous weight loss can be.

Because along with excess fat, you apparently also end up losing any loyalty you had for your country. These darn "diets" (wink wink) have got to go!

No weight loss, no abs, no treason. It all makes sense.

Let's go back to the left, to left.



http://images.dawn.com/news/1176361/8-things-from-india-that-pakistan-must-ban-right-now-for-realz

 

[Laozi]

7) Justin Trudeau
Just look at the way he's dancing, it’s like the beginning of every grand Bollywood number ever! Why you do this, Trudeau? Why you love bhangra?

Banned.

Anyone who randomly busts some bhangra moves (gasp!) ain't no friend of ours


8) Pierce Brosnan
You can't sit with us if your retirement plan involves endorsing pan masalas in India.

We bet Daniel Craig's rethinking life after Bond; it doesn't seem too pretty

http://images.dawn.com/news/1176361/8-things-from-india-that-pakistan-must-ban-right-now-for-realz

 

[Kompromat]

DAWN has vested business interests in India, you'll never see them criticizing the Indian ban on Pakistani media.

 

[Hell hound]

9 indians on PDF

 

[Max]

Ban everything, why only 8, ban pigeons too..

 

[Laozi]

9 indians on PDF

Great !!!

10. Ban Urdu

Not one of their provinces people speak Urdu which is their national language. Pakistani should officially declare themselves ARABS. And replace Urdu with Arabic. It will solve all their identity crisis.

 

[Rahim Malik]

Banning will not stop anything - we should stop consuming it individually- removing all these things from root.

 

[newb3e]

What chus article...do they get paid for writting bs?

 

[Shot-Caller]

What a load of BS. As if these things matter to Pakistanis. I know it was supposed to be funny but its garbage.

 

[The Sandman]

i knew it's gonna be dawn or tribune chawal hii mari hai author ne what a chu........

 

[kabooter_maila]

View attachment 345182

The high road is for suckers. Know what's the best way to deal with conflict? Retaliation!

First India banned our actors, then our drama serials; what's next? We need to show them who's boss.

This means that anything remotely Indian must go. Let's start with these eight:

1) Abs, especially Ranveer Singh's
We can't tell you how many Pakistani women have been disarmed by Ranveer Singh's abs.

Or how many people have been immobilised by Katrina Kaif's bod.

Surely this is a ploy to weaken us. Ban abs!

Abs are decidedly Indian. Ban them.


2) Vin Diesel
He was adorably fast and furious before he signed on to star in xXx: Return of Xander Cage with Deepika Padukone.

But now, with all that steamy cosying up, he's got Deepika cooties for sure. And Deepika is Indian, after all.

We declare Vin to be Indian by association.

So what if he's got a bod to die for? No more Vin! No more Vin!

Why Deepika, Vin? WHY?


FYI: The jury's still out on Dwayne Johnson.

We can smell what The Rock is cooking... and it smells like Bollywood


3) Coldplay
The band had no problem appropriating Indian culture and offering bit partsto Sonam Kapoor.

But they don't come to Pakistan to shoot music videos on roofs and cash in on our slums. WHY? Discrimination. Ban them!

We're not going to let them gora the explorer on our turf!


4) Mangoes
This Katrina is a big troublemaker. First the abs, then she gets up close and personal with a mango in this ad campaign.

Sorry Aamir Liaquat, we know this is the ultimate sacrifice, but anything licked by an Indian has to go.

BAN MANGOES!

That's being said, let's all lovingly look at Pakistan the way Katrina looks at this mango


5) Excessive gesticulation
Pfft, being too animated is for traitors. Aggressive arm movements are not for us.

And we thought SRK was bad, what with Modi's signature moves and all...


Aim to be a potato instead.

Here is a totally unrelated picture of our Prime Minister.

6) Weight loss
Let Adnan Sami be the prime example of how treacherous weight loss can be.

Because along with excess fat, you apparently also end up losing any loyalty you had for your country. These darn "diets" (wink wink) have got to go!

No weight loss, no abs, no treason. It all makes sense.

Let's go back to the left, to left.



http://images.dawn.com/news/1176361/8-things-from-india-that-pakistan-must-ban-right-now-for-realz

What a piece of trash. Common people people in Pakistan give a sh!t to all Indian stuff. We don't want anything Indian in Pakistan at all.

 

[unbiasedopinion]

ban the ban

 

[coffee_cup]

Never ending BS.

DAWN, Tribune and GEO.

Seems like foreign NGOs have got an increase in funding. Expect even more horse shyte coming from the above three.

 

[Chauvinist]

Ban Katrina.. even her posters must be wiped off..
Shadeed qisam ka complex hota hai is ki 28" ki kmar daikh k.

 

[Lavrentiy]

Ban Katrina.. even her posters must be wiped off..
Shadeed qisam ka complex hota hai is ki 28" ki kmar daikh k.

Eat vegies and do a lot of exercise. I pray that you reach the magical 28 inch mark.