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To get married or not to get married that is the question...

nForce

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I was thinking about this thing for quite some time,and finally I thought of starting a new thread here in PDF,where the members usually show exceptional debating skills.

Forget about perceptions,religion,society and all,and let us talk about whats there to gain or loose.Why shall we get married?What will happen if we dont get married?What do we loose?What do we gain dont marry?

I think one can lead a good and healthy life just like a married person does,or probably a much more happening,free and jocund life.Arguments are welcome.

p.s. Please dont bring countries and peoples and ethnicity and religion here.
 
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Been engaged 3 times, never married. Have co-habitated several times. All in all...glad the way things have turned out. Especialy considering I still talk to the first girl I was engaged to...I shudder to think that I planned to marry her!
 
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I am married for about 8 years. Happily so!
I used to think that only insecure men (note the gender) really want to get married. There is no shortage of women for a good looking men (like me:)) to co-habitate or...just have with.
But, like Professor Higgins who got used to Elijah, I am very used to my wife. I like her. Most of the time. Sometimes not. Our dog and me wait for her to get home from work, if I am home first.
We live happily. We planned NOT to have any kids. Enjoy life to the fullest. A dog can be a great substitute. We are not rich but most of our friends seem to envy us and seek our company for socialize. We enjoy cruises, beaches, nightlife, mountain drives... It has been almost 10 years like this, counting the two year dating period.
Life is short. I want to live it. And my marriage has enriched it. Even my favorite philosopher Nietzsche would have preferred to be married.
 
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I was talking to my elder cousin a few days back who got married about an year ago.He says being married is one of the greatest things that can happen to you.He is a family man out and out,goes to his office everyday,comes back home in the evening and helps his wife cook dinner.........I say,I can have all those things,and still choose to remain unmarried.Marriage means obligations,it means boundaries.Marriage comes along with a lot of do's and donts,with the dont's in the dominating side.Why cant one just lead life king-size,without any limitation?I can love someone too and not get married,I can even have kids too and not get married.Maradona already had two kids,before he finally chose to settle down....
 
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coming from someone who is less than 2 weeks away from being married, you will stop asking the question when you meet the right one.
good luck in whatever path you choose :cheers:
 
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Quite an interesting thread ;) Let me add one of my comments before the "married " members take over and start debating...

I think one can lead a good and healthy life just like a married person does,or probably a much more happening,free and jocund life.Arguments are welcome.

In my opinion , Bachelor days are real fun, carefree and all that , but like all good things they dont last too long .

A time comes when a person - man/women begins to live a more responsible life , no longer has the energy and enthusiasm to face everything alone -- that time also coincides with wanting some security or stability in life - by stability I mean assurances of a home , money , family life , etc .

This is when they would start looking for a suitable partner .

Just conjecturing .....:)
 
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"Let a woman in your life..." song by Prof. Higgins from 'My Fair Lady' can apply to some.

PS. I will not get married again, or even seek a long term relationship again, IF I break up with my wife. Things have been good. But there is definitely a loss of freedom. And I have told my wife that she would be the last if we ever break up. She does not believe me on that.
 
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This is like asking whether you should climb off a cliff if you see one or don't get near the edge of the cliff. Of course don't marry. This is one decision I think should be one of the easiest decision in life, yet I have no idea how so many people fall for it. I mean come on, do you really want to ruin the rest of your life? Do you really want to be controlled by a woman, bear shouting, screaming, etc? The way marriages turn out, within no time you'll be asked by your wife to tell her when you're going to the bathroom. They control all the finances, etc. Most importantly, you're not a free man anymore.

Plus if you're living in western countries, the marriage is between you, your wife, AND THE STATE. Your wife steals vast majority of your property, wealth, etc at the end of the marriage, high chance of false allegations of abuse (child abuse included), and the state enables her to do that. They give women incentive to divorce, and enable her to steal your wealth. Lawyers will often push her to file a false abuse allegations (that's if it's not already on her mind).

Even I am not married yet I can see what a farce it is. I personally want to avoid it like a plague. Vast majority of married men will tell you not to get married. Odds are it will turn into a farce, and those odds are increasing everyday in this day and age. Don't be fooled by her beauty, the innocence on her face, etc.
 
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^lol smc, you reminded me of our discussion sometime ago on this topic. it was quite an entertainment :D
 
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Come on guys, this is not a joke. This is one decision that more often than not leads to life being 1000x more miserable.
 
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In honor of SMC:

 
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Many people say,that if you love someone,and you marry that person,then it is like taking an oath to be with each other for life-time,in good times as well as when times are dark.it is like a bond.

The same is with friendship.If you have good friends then they are always out there for you.If you have bad relationship in a marriage then it may break apart as well,you end up having a divorce,which gives you depression.With a live-together relationship,you have more space and freedom,and you can rule out the divorce part,because there is no bond.

I have been in a steady relationship for quite sometime and I thought me and my girlfriend understand each other well.So I shared this idea with her.The results were, well kinda disappointing.I was called a lot of things,which on being summarized,means "Pure Evil".I just dont understand,why people have these preoccupations in mind.
 
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In honor of SMC:


:lol::lol::lol:

This video captures a lot of my thoughts. Few years after a man has been married, this song and my posts will come to his mind.
 
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@ Meengla

searching about Nietzsche..sounds interesting.
 
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IDK about anything more, but it keeps your and your life patner happy forever. You both share joy and sorrow, find mutual love and answers to problems. A woman is always insecure without a man (without her man), and a man feels too stressed (who will clean the house, wash clothes and cook dinner eh? :P)

For more details, contact:


ZAKI !!
 
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