There are 8.8 Million Pakistanis in the diaspora living in many corners of the world mainly in the Anglosphere(UK,Canada,USA,NZ and Australia) and the GCC Arab states. At least 3-4 generations have lived abroad many of us primarily speak the English language daily this forum run by expats embodies that however they are many "experts" who deride those Pakistanis that dont speak Urdu as non-Pakistani or dont know Pakistan as if expats visiting only in summers or once few years have the same knowledge or know how of daily dealings than local who was born there.For Pakistani news I do rely on Pakistani media by having relatives or my parents translate because I find the content in English tend to be biased or done by Pakistani expats abroad or small "elite clique".
I recently spoke to an elderly Multani acquittance (now retired after having worked his entire life in Pakistan) who came to the US a few years ago, and spends nearly half the year in Pakistan. This is how he explained it to me:
”Those who have migrated to western counties and gotten citizenship there are citizens of that country. They are Pakistani-.... what ever country they live in. Pakistani-Americans for example. If you weren’t born in Pakistan you are of Pakistani ancestry but you are not ”Pakistani”. Even if both parents were born in Pakistan the child can not be considered Pakistani, because the child will accept the norms of the culture they live in as their own.”
This mirrors the experiences of other ethnic groups that have come to America, except the people that don’t look “White” are still considered outsiders, to one degree or another.
Being stuck in the middle; no longer considered Pakistani but not yet considered fully American, may make you feel a loss of identity. To bridge the gap, opening or running a community center can help.
With the “browning of America”, perhaps in a generation when minorities will make up the majority, then the preconception of what an American looks like will be expanded.
IMHO, If you go back to Pakistan, make a life there, learn the language and cultural norms, only then can you assimilate back into being a Pakistani. Even then, if you don’t have a Pakistani citizenship you aren't truly Pakistani.
here is an interesting clip of an Italian-American who considers herself “Italian” in the way Americans mean “Italian”, but if you ask an actual Italian, she is as American as any other.