HAIDER
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The lead up for the third Test has been something like the closing moments of The Departed where you just dont know who will be shooting whom next. But more pertinently, its been the story of the Akmals in the shape of Munna Bhai and Circuit. Lage raho, Munna Bhai.
Sadly, the story that bhai log had made a breakthrough on the tour has been doing a round of the blogs. I doubt that. Not even Nostradamus could predict that three catches would be going in the direction they did. But what followed the end of the Test was unbelievable, even with the scripts written for Pakistani teams on tour. Kamran was not letting go.
Bole toh, the team management did the rare smart thing on this tour and announced the playing eleven with a full day to go. Doesnt happen in a team that often tells players to stand down just when theyre getting up from the bench to walk out in the field. Perhaps it was the one way to silence the media salvos that were being fired by the beleaguered Kamran. Hell make a fine Pakistani president one day.
Or at least a good cabinet member: Why should I resign? I have my partys support to continue. The Gaddafi Stadium full bench is targeting just one man. I have given so many sacrifices for sake of cricket (majority are still backing me). I am here to serve the people and I was elected by sola crore awam permanent membership and not by the selectors.
If I thought that the Pakistani team would be joining the PML-N upon their return, it now appears that Kamran Akmal will be joining the PPP. Indeed, the implied threat from the younger Akmal, Umar, was astonishing: he no play, I no play. It shows the extent of the effect that current politics have on the younger generation. But then, Umar is juvenile and should be forgiven for his misplaced loyalty to family.
Still, this incident shows the milieu in which the Pakistan team operates. Even with the vocal record of some past feudal-minded cricketers, I cannot remember a more blatant threat from a team member. It makes the notoriously intimidating Sarfraz Nawaz seem a plea bargainer by comparison.
I think the team management took a huge risk by presenting Sarfraz with the green cap on the ground. It should have taken place in the local infirmary with assistants bearing straitjackets present. Imagine if Kami had snatched it from the captains hand and run away with it keeping in mind how hes been telling the management, reporters, hotel valet and the coach driver that he will not give up his teddy bear. Would have been a hilarious scene with the whole team chasing him around the Bellerive Oval, with brother Umar encouraging Boogity, Boogity, Boogity! Watch the classic Smokey And The Bandit to see what I mean, guys.
Luckily the two keepers gave jadoo ki jhappi to each other and went their separate ways. And so ended the 42 Test run of The Man in the Iron Gloves.
But what has not ended is the realisation that the writ of the tour management is not worth the paper it is written on. There is more chaos there than in our understanding of democracy. It seemed that it would take a gunfight at the OK Corral to settle the issue between Mohammad Yousuf and Kamran publicly taking on the manager and the coach. Worse, they seemed to be winning the battle. The media couldnt believe their luck. Nor could Pontings men, who threw their support behind Kamran the moment they heard the PCB had decided to send Sarfraz to replace him for the Third Test.
Interestingly, the players knew they would win either way. Their antics would put pressure on the team management not to drop Kamran, and that would allow them to continue escaping behind the stumps given his mind set. And if the management did drop him, the split in the Pakistan camp would also play to their advantage.
But the damage had been done much before the Pakistan team did the unprecedented and announced the playing eleven a day before. It corroborated what everyone with even a malfunctioning pair of eyes and ears has been saying for some time: this aint no job for people who should be watching the cricket from their retirement homes while being fed porridge by nurses.
The intentions of the people who made the stupid decision of sending Sarfraz back from New Zealand should be investigated. Was it to guard against a situation like this, knowing Australia would be tough for Kamran as the pitches would give Danish Kaneria more bounce?
One more thing: if there had been no dictate from a besieged throne back home eager to make a scapegoat and deflect from the real issues of incompetence and laissez faire management, Intikhab Alam and Abdul Raqeeb would have been bullied into continuing with Kamran. And they would have buckled easily. Their approach to every crisis is to emphasise that the nation should hope for the best because they will try their best. After all, they have so many dollars at stake. Best to back the power players and procure their recommendation before the next tour.
Akmal’s antics — The Dawn Blog Blog Archive
Sadly, the story that bhai log had made a breakthrough on the tour has been doing a round of the blogs. I doubt that. Not even Nostradamus could predict that three catches would be going in the direction they did. But what followed the end of the Test was unbelievable, even with the scripts written for Pakistani teams on tour. Kamran was not letting go.
Bole toh, the team management did the rare smart thing on this tour and announced the playing eleven with a full day to go. Doesnt happen in a team that often tells players to stand down just when theyre getting up from the bench to walk out in the field. Perhaps it was the one way to silence the media salvos that were being fired by the beleaguered Kamran. Hell make a fine Pakistani president one day.
Or at least a good cabinet member: Why should I resign? I have my partys support to continue. The Gaddafi Stadium full bench is targeting just one man. I have given so many sacrifices for sake of cricket (majority are still backing me). I am here to serve the people and I was elected by sola crore awam permanent membership and not by the selectors.
If I thought that the Pakistani team would be joining the PML-N upon their return, it now appears that Kamran Akmal will be joining the PPP. Indeed, the implied threat from the younger Akmal, Umar, was astonishing: he no play, I no play. It shows the extent of the effect that current politics have on the younger generation. But then, Umar is juvenile and should be forgiven for his misplaced loyalty to family.
Still, this incident shows the milieu in which the Pakistan team operates. Even with the vocal record of some past feudal-minded cricketers, I cannot remember a more blatant threat from a team member. It makes the notoriously intimidating Sarfraz Nawaz seem a plea bargainer by comparison.
I think the team management took a huge risk by presenting Sarfraz with the green cap on the ground. It should have taken place in the local infirmary with assistants bearing straitjackets present. Imagine if Kami had snatched it from the captains hand and run away with it keeping in mind how hes been telling the management, reporters, hotel valet and the coach driver that he will not give up his teddy bear. Would have been a hilarious scene with the whole team chasing him around the Bellerive Oval, with brother Umar encouraging Boogity, Boogity, Boogity! Watch the classic Smokey And The Bandit to see what I mean, guys.
Luckily the two keepers gave jadoo ki jhappi to each other and went their separate ways. And so ended the 42 Test run of The Man in the Iron Gloves.
But what has not ended is the realisation that the writ of the tour management is not worth the paper it is written on. There is more chaos there than in our understanding of democracy. It seemed that it would take a gunfight at the OK Corral to settle the issue between Mohammad Yousuf and Kamran publicly taking on the manager and the coach. Worse, they seemed to be winning the battle. The media couldnt believe their luck. Nor could Pontings men, who threw their support behind Kamran the moment they heard the PCB had decided to send Sarfraz to replace him for the Third Test.
Interestingly, the players knew they would win either way. Their antics would put pressure on the team management not to drop Kamran, and that would allow them to continue escaping behind the stumps given his mind set. And if the management did drop him, the split in the Pakistan camp would also play to their advantage.
But the damage had been done much before the Pakistan team did the unprecedented and announced the playing eleven a day before. It corroborated what everyone with even a malfunctioning pair of eyes and ears has been saying for some time: this aint no job for people who should be watching the cricket from their retirement homes while being fed porridge by nurses.
The intentions of the people who made the stupid decision of sending Sarfraz back from New Zealand should be investigated. Was it to guard against a situation like this, knowing Australia would be tough for Kamran as the pitches would give Danish Kaneria more bounce?
One more thing: if there had been no dictate from a besieged throne back home eager to make a scapegoat and deflect from the real issues of incompetence and laissez faire management, Intikhab Alam and Abdul Raqeeb would have been bullied into continuing with Kamran. And they would have buckled easily. Their approach to every crisis is to emphasise that the nation should hope for the best because they will try their best. After all, they have so many dollars at stake. Best to back the power players and procure their recommendation before the next tour.
Akmal’s antics — The Dawn Blog Blog Archive
