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One day in the future, George Bush has a heart attack and dies. He immediately goes to hell, where the devil is waiting for him. "I don't know what to do," says the devil. "You are on my list, but I have no room for you. You definitely have to stay here, so I'll tell you what I'm going to...

Einstein dies and goes to heaven. At the Pearly Gates, Saint Peter tells him, "You look like Einstein, but you have NO idea the lengths that some people will go to sneak into Heaven. Can you prove who you really are?" Einstein ponders for a few seconds and asks, "Could I have a blackboard...

An American tourist in London decides to skip his tour group and explore the city on his own. He wanders around, seeing the sights, occasionally stopping at a quaint pub to soak up the local culture, chat with the locals, and have a pint of stout. After a while, he finds himself in a very...

One day George W. Bush and Dick Cheney walk into a diner. A waitress walks up to them and asks if she can take their order. Bush leans close to her and says, "Honey, can I have a quickie?" The waitress is appalled and yells at the President about women's rights and storms away. Cheney...

It was the first day of school and a new student named Pedro Martinez, the son of a Mexican restaurateur, entered the fourth grade. The teacher said, "Let's begin by reviewing some American history. "Who said 'Give me Liberty, or give me Death?'" She saw a sea of blank faces, except for...

Common guys, only 36 votes, i mean, we can do better than that. regards sincerely

it appeared in the teh news today Wednesday, January 20, 2010 BEIJING: China on Sunday launched an orbiter into space for its satellite navigation and positioning network. It was the third orbiter that China has launched for its independent satellite navigation and positioning network...

looks like a nice and decent ride, isnt it? hope you like it. regards

fracker i appreciate your opinion but instead of comparing democracy with dictatorship, please discuss the policies of the 3 generals/former presidents of pakistan. it will be appropraite to the thread as well as will generate healthy discussion/comments/points. thank you regards...

go to the forum page and you will find a section with the name of memebers introduction. introduce yourself in that section in a new thread. it is simple, try it. regards

There was this couple that was married for 20 years, and every time they made love the husband always insisted on shutting off the lights. Well, after 20 years the wife felt this was stupid. She figured she would break him out of the crazy habit. So one night, while they were in the middle...

A man walked into his backyard one morning and found there was a gorilla in a tree. He called a gorilla-removal service, and soon a serviceman arrived with a stick, a Chihuahua, a pair of handcuffs and a shotgun. "Now listen carefully," he told the homeowner, "I'm going to climb the tree and...

A wife was in the kitchen making a breakfast of fried eggs for her husband. Suddenly , her husband burst into the kitchen. ???Careful,??? he said, ???CAREFUL! Put in some more butter! Oh my gosh! You're cooking too many at once. TOO MANY! Turn them! TURN THEM NOW! We need more butter. Oh my...

Emily Sue passed away and Bubba called 911. The 911 operator told Bubba that she would send someone out right away. "Where do you live?" asked the operator. Bubba replied, "At the end of Eucalyptus Drive." The operator asked, "Can you spell that for me? "There was a long pause...

One day there was this farmer. He had 3 daughters and they each had a date on Saturday night. The first date comes to the door. the farmer answers the door. The first date says, "Hi my name is Joe, I'm here to take your daughter Flow to eat some dough." The farmer says sure. Soon the second...

I recently picked a new primary care physician. After two visits and exhaustive lab tests, he said I was doing "fairly well" for my age. A little concerned about that comment, I couldn't resist asking him, "Do you think I'll live to be 80?" He asked, "Well, do you smoke tobacco or...

A rather well built woman, Joan, spent almost all of her vacation time sunbathing on the roof of her hotel. The first day she sunbathed, she wore a red bathing suit. However on the second day, she felt a little more adventurous. She slipped out of it in order to get an overall tan figuring that...

It was many years ago since the embarrassing day when a young woman, with a baby in her arms, entered his butcher shop and confronted him with the news that the baby was his and asked what was he going to do about it? Finally he offered to provide her with free meat until the boy was 16. She...

Three nuns were talking. The first nun said, "I was cleaning in Father's room the other day and do you know what I found? A bunch of pornographic magazines." "What did you do?" the other nuns asked. "Well, of course I threw them in the trash." The second nun said, "Well, I can top...